Irene Rice Staver

Irene was born in Philadelphia, PA on September 19, 1926, the second daughter to Carolyne Dudas Ryszeleski and Joseph Caesar Ryszeleski (Rice). Irene, her parents and two sisters, Eleanor (Elly) and Joan (Ducky) resided in a brownstone on Richmond St. where Joe had his law practice on the first floor. Because the family moved quite often during and after the years of the Depression, her two sisters Elly and Ducky were her constant companions, best friends and occasional rivals. Her fond memories of Philly included living across the street from the exciting Philadelphia street car, sitting on the front steps during hot summer months, the annual Maypole dance in town, and the dreaded polish language and tap dance classes in which her parents insisted the girls enroll (she recalled excelling at neither one).

The family then decamped to Haddon Heights, New Jersey. Irene attended St. Rose of Lima Catholic School where she remembered once being publicly chastised for misspelling a word on the blackboard. She later wrote, “We wore our hearts on our sleeves, yet so often in those early Depression days we buried the hurts as best we could, and let life carry us on to the next adventure, happy or sad.” This early-adopted philosophy seemed to buoy our mother much of her life.

Her memoirs also describe the mundane: helping her mother “bank the coal furnace at night” and the joyful: Christmas celebrations with their large extended family. At one particular Christmas, her uncles pooled together their savings and presented the girls with their very own bike which no doubt instilled in Irene a lifelong love of bike riding. Stories about the fights over the shared bike are embedded in Staver family lore.

In 1934 The Rice family moved again to Detroit where the highlight was Irene’s ascension to the Detroit Free Press’ Spelling Bee Regional Competition (she lost–stage fright). She remained an avid reader, unchallenged speller, Boggle and Scrabble player and author of countless hand-written, unpublished children’s stories about and for her grandchildren. These books will be forever treasured.

After several moves during the Depression, the family eventually settled in the D.C. area and Irene graduated from Bethesda-Chevy Chase High School, the alma mater of 3 of her 4 children, where she played basketball and sang in the acapella choir.

As mentioned in her obituary, Irene held several secretarial jobs in the 60’s and 70’s. Her writing and editing abilities were superb, her typing prowess and speed (wpm), legendary. She proudly completed her BA in Communications from American University at age 50 after countless hours of night school. She received her paralegal degree at The University of Maryland soon after and she enjoyed working in the legal division of the F.D.I.C. until she retired; her interest in this field undoubtedly influenced by her father’s lifelong practice of law. In her free time she read historical biographies and murder mysteries, often 2-3 at any given time. A visit to the Little Falls library was a weekly pilgrimage.

The Staver home always had dogs and cats, many from local shelters or through friends, all with their own family stories. When 2 of the kids found rescues (at different times) in dire straits, Irene did not hesitate to bring them in and care for them with a laugh and a cuddle. At one Christmas, Ken and Irene excitedly encouraged everyone to bring their dogs. Chaos ensued. While Irene quickly put a stop to that tradition, her love of animals endured.

In hindsight, Irene’s athletic pursuits may have emerged on the streets of Detroit with her introduction to sandlot baseball (hardball, no less!), although she and her sisters were mostly relegated to the outfield by the neighborhood boys. She wore her tomboy moniker with pride all her life as a high school basketball player, Bethesda bike-rider, and avid tennis player into her 60’s. She was once paired with a “much better twenty-something young man” at the Bethesda YMCA mixed doubles “championships” and they won. She loved telling the story of that match, usually giving all the credit to her partner, and keeping the trophy close until she moved out of her Bethesda home in 2021. Baseball was probably her favorite sport to follow. In addition to attending games with her kids, she often listened to Orioles games on the radio, carefully recording the stats on a clipboard for fun. She and Ken also were members of University of Maryland’s Terrapin Club for at least a decade, spending their Saturdays at (formerly) Byrd Stadium.

Her lifelong love of swimming grew into regularly swimming laps in the summer at Little Falls swim club and throughout the winter at the outdoor heated Bethesda Y.M.C.A pool, no matter the temperature. She continued swimming into her 80s. Her last athletic undertaking would be tai chi classes in Potomac where she described the instructor as “a great burst of sunshine”.

Her children were of course her passion above all. She rarely missed her 3 son’s track meets, baseball or basketball games or daughter’s sports games or musical performances. She sewed and constructed our Halloween costumes, led Cub Scout meetings and was the queen of stuffing at Thanksgiving and French toast on Saturday mornings. She often sent letters reminding everyone that ___ was graduating or having a birthday and to please reach out to them. She planned her parents’ 50th anniversary party with great fanfare. She wrote packing lists weeks in advance for upcoming trips. She treasured all written cards sent to her and kept them taped to the cabinets or in neat folders.

Irene’s love of music and art was well known. In her youth she sang in several choirs and as she grew older never passed up an opportunity to listen to anything from Beethoven to the Beatles. She loved musical theater and derived great joy in attending her daughter’s and grandchildren’s musical concerts and plays. She often organized outings to the Kennedy Center, The National Gallery of Art and the Hirshhorn Gallery in Washington D.C., reminding all of us how lucky we were to have these international gems in our “backyard”.

Irene approached traveling during her life with passion and enthusiasm. She and Ken and family spent countless memorable summers in York Harbor, ME with Ken’s parents until their beloved Preble Island family house was sold. She and Ken then began taking annual vacations to see friends for July 4th at Bethany Beach, anniversary trips to Gettysburg and New England, the DelMarVa coast and later Irene hosted family weeks in Rehoboth Beach, DE and Sandbridge, VA. When visiting her children and grandchildren on weekends, she was game for anything. She would derive equal pleasure from going to an art gallery or a swim meet as she would betting at the racetrack. Later, she would embark on more ambitious adventures with friends and family to Mexico, Hawaii, China, Italy, the British Isles and the Southwest, each meticulously recorded in her voluminous photo albums over the years.

Undoubtedly, some of her greatest adventures occurred on her own back sunporch. Under a window seat, she kept Legos, toys, bird books and notebooks at the ready. Over the years, she played games, composed stories and created adventures with her (then) young grandchildren; hoping to spark their interest in the greatest adventure of all—the world around them and the stories and memories it inspires.

She influenced all of us with her unconditional love, generosity, laughter, energy and infectious optimism. Our mother was one-of-a-kind and we will miss her dearly.