Mary Carolyn Tolbert Smith was born in Oklahoma City on December 13, 1931, to James R. Tolbert and Mary Noble Tolbert. She grew up in Oklahoma City. She attended Classen High School and graduated from the University of Oklahoma where she met her husband, John Dickerson Smith of Clinton, Oklahoma. She moved to Atlanta in 1956 when her husband and family came to develop and run Lenox Square.
Carolyn was known for a ready smile and very quick wit. She was easily recognized by her voice and laugh. She was open to people and ideas and took and gave good advice. She was a kind, strong and smart. She was a generous, ready friend who went the extra mile. Her love and values were clear. She lived with game, enduring grit and good humor. Carolyn called her shots.
As a young girl she was an accomplished horseback rider and she continued to be fond of all things having to do with Oklahoma and ranch life. In keeping with family tradition, she read avidly. Throughout her life in Atlanta, Carolyn played and enjoyed competitive tennis. She loved her dogs. She drove quickly but not too fast.
Carolyn was a devoted wife, mother, grandmother and great grandmother. With her husband, she travelled the world bringing back art, mementos and stories of friends and places. Her house was always home base to the children and grandchildren on the Holidays. One example of her dedication to family, when she was told her son was marrying into a Spanish speaking family, she learned Spanish. Her grandchildren especially remember her for her impromptu drop cloth picnics in the yard or the den, and a refrigerator in the garage full of Cokes, cream soda, ginger ale and Orangina for the taking. Carolyn celebrated the news of the birth of each of her eight great grandchildren with wonder, laughter and pride.
Throughout her life Carolyn was an active participant, organizer and leader in numerous Atlanta organizations including Presbyterian Village, whose board she chaired, the Women’s Shelter at First Presbyterian Church, The Center for Performing Arts, Meals on Wheels, the Junior League, and numerous other roles and activities for the benefit of others. She was a leader but, importantly, chose to work as an active and everyday participant in the organizations she served. As one example, Carolyn regularly spent nights in the women’s shelter at First Presbyterian Church.
Carolyn Smith is survived by her brother, James R. Tolbert III, and his wife Elizabeth McMahan Tolbert of Oklahoma City; her two children, Carol Ann Schaffner of Los Altos, California and John F. Sandy Smith and his wife Maria Susana Gancedo Smith of Atlanta, Georgia; and her grandchildren Kate Schaffner of Battle Creek, Michigan; Michael Schaffner of San Francisco, California; William Smith and his wife Kaitlin Smith of Lafayette, California; Dr. Susana Smith Harbutt and her husband Chris Harbutt of Atlanta, Georgia; Cristina Smith O’Brien and her husband Dr. Colin O’Brien, of Atlanta, Georgia; Erich Smith of San Francisco, California; and her eight great grandchildren, Halden Smith, Inés Smith, Eliza Smith, Fisher Smith, James Harbutt, Alicia Harbutt, Emilia O’Brien and Sofia O’Brien.
She is missed and loved by her family and all who knew her. A service for family and friends will be held at The First Presbyterian Church of Atlanta at 11:00 a.m. on Monday, January 9, 2023. In lieu of flowers please make gifts to The First Presbyterian Church of Atlanta.
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