Jay was born on June 12, 1933 in Berlin, NH. His parents were Marion Oleson and George Edward Lafleur. Jay was the grandson of Catholic French Canadian and Lutheran Norwegian immigrants. This mixed marriage, not without consequences, taught Jay to respect diversity.
In 1943 Jay’s brother Jon was born on June 11, just two hours before Jay’s 10th birthday. Marian and George were kind parents whose home was a sanctuary of peace and respect. The boys grew up among fabled autumn foliage and the majestic Mount Washington. They picked wild blueberries and, watchful for brown bear, wild raspberries which their mother baked in her famous pies. Jay and his father fished for pickerel, catfish and trout, always ignoring the limit. Jay would eat rabbit, partridge and venison but refused to hunt.
Jay graduated from Berlin HS in 1951, acting in the senior play and managing the cross country ski team, coached by his cousin Edward Oleson. Inspired by his chemistry teacher, Mr. Owen, Jay attended Massachusetts College of Pharmacy in Boston at a time when the mostly male students wore ties and white lab coats.
Destined to become a military officer of some distinction, Jay was not afraid of manual labor. One summer job was unusual. The Brown paper company floated softwood logs down the Androscoggin River and Jay’s crew, using long barbed poles, poked the stragglers back into the mainstream.
Upon graduation from MCP in 1955, Jay became a soldier in the Army. In Texas in the 50’s it was not easy to find a venue for the Christmas party of his racially integrated unit. There were many refusals. Finally one cautious owner agreed but stipulated that minorities had to enter by the back door. No problem. Jay’s invitations read “Everyone please use the back door”.
In 1960 he was sent to Korea and worked in a MASH unit, the very one on which the famous book was based. The officer who fell asleep at his desk was Jay’s boss.
Phyllis (“Fe”) Mehuron from Rutland, VT was a nurse and when Jay met her it was love at first sight. They decided to marry in Korea. They had to go into Seoul to fill out many confusing forms. Jay and Fe assumed they were getting a marriage license. No. By signing a lot of paperwork, they had actually become married. An unexpected consequence!! Being devout Catholics, a proper nuptial Mass soon followed.
When their tour of duty was over they sailed home. When the ship passed under the Golden Gate Bridge, they wept.
Under orders from the Pentagon, Jay established a pharmacy tech course at BAMC. He held high standards, poking the stragglers back into the mainstream when he could and transferring them when necessary. When Jay documented the incompetence of a pharmacist and gave him notice, the fellow pleaded to the General, not realizing that he and Jay were friends. The General asked if Jay might give him a second chance.” “Yes”, Jay countered, “if you assign him as your personal pharmacist.” The General laughed: “okay, you win.”
Jay earned a master’s degree from UM in Ann Arbor, interned in Denver and returned to San Antonio. Then it was on to Fort Gordon, GA. When Ike and Mamie were in town, Jay filled their prescriptions.
Between 1976 and 1981, Jay was Chief Pharmacist for Europe and the Middle-East based in Heidelberg. It was the family’s first trip to Europe and they made the best of it. Jay soon learned that to order just one beer, he had to raise only his thumb! They went on Volksmarches with the locals and put the medals on a walking stick. Favorite places were Garmisch-Partenkirchen Germany and Wengen, Switzerland and the majestic cathedrals of Ulm and Cologne.
In 2006 Jay returned to Heidelberg and a young officer told Jon that “in pharmacy circles, Jay is a legend”. The Pentagon agreed and that summer gave the first “Jay Lafleur Pharmacy Award” to the Colonel himself.
After retiring from the military Jay worked in hospitals in San Marcos and Sequin. In San Marcos the CEO realized that Jay was a treasure and he sought his advice. In Sequin he met Al Gill who remained a true friend.
Jay bought a spacious home in Cibolo and had a lot of company including an aunt and cousins from NH, RI and OK. Jon brought three CT friends, one of whom always arrived on Amtrak. Everyone enjoyed Jay’s hospitality. He cooked delicious meals, bravely using the pressure cooker for beef pot roast. They played Mexican Trains into the night.
Jay never saw combat, but in 2012 he was ambushed by Parkinson’s and his life changed. Forced to abandon the house he so loved, he resided for a while at Gruene Senior Living, New Braunfels, where everyone loved him. When his condition advanced, he was cared for by his selfless, steadfast friend Joel Esquivel, assisted by Tina, Ule, Joel T, Jesse and Cameron.
Parkinson’s may have ravaged his body but Jay never surrendered his soul. A Mass of Christian Burial will be at 12 noon, Wednesday, January 13, 2020 at Sunset Funeral Home Chapel. The officiant is Jay’s good friend Deacon Terry Guilbert, a retired pharmacist Lt. Colonel whom Jay met in Landstuhl, Germany in 1979. Visiting hours at Sunset Funeral Home Chapel, 1701 Austin Highway, San Antonio, TX 78218 are 11 am – 12 noon, Wednesday, January 13, 2020. Interment will follow at the Ft. Sam Houston National Cemetery with Full Military Honors at 1:30 pm.
Jay leaves his son Mark, daughter Lisa, brother Jon, grandchildren Jennifer, Mathew and Jessica and great-grandchildren Callie, Jacob and Thorin, many relatives and friends, especially Joel Esquivel. Jay was predeceased by his wife Phyllis, all of his 20 aunts and uncles, and lifelong friends Joan Antonsen Wilson and Bob Hanson.
Donations in Jay’s memory may be made to Wounded Warriors.
“Dear Jay, you have walked through the valley of the shadow. May the angels lead you into Paradise and with the saints may you have eternal rest.”
FAMILY
Jay leaves his son Mark, daughter Lisa, brother Jon, grandchildren Jennifer, Mathew and Jessica and great-grandchildren Callie, Jacob and Thorin, many relatives and friends, especially Joel Esquivel.
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