Sean Matthew Struckman

How can someone even begin to describe Sean? This is far too soon for an obituary to be written about Sean Struckman. There would never have been enough time. He was his own special entity, a person unlike any other. He had endless moments of staggering kindness, unsurpassed wisdom, amazingly astute observations, unmatched humor, gentleness beyond what anyone else showed. He also had darkness and some demons to battle, and it could be hard to understand what to do. He was the person you heard stories about and wondered how that could possibly be true. He had embellishments enough that sometimes there was doubt, but then you’d find out that the story was true, and it was incredible.

He was a cherubic child, wild corkscrew curls and a huge smile. He was all heart and kindness. He would hold a bumblebee in his hand, astonished by the creature, and then be shocked that it would sting him, or fly away. He thought if you showed kindness, you would get kindness in return. This was a recurring theme in his life being taken aback by the way kindness could be paid back with betrayal or cruelty, and while he certainly learned to trust less as he got older, he still had a shining optimism, a feeling that it would be okay.

Growing up, he was clever and hilarious. He could draw well for as long as anyone can remember. He was a devoted brother - woe to anyone that messed with his sisters! Even with his older sister, he was passionately protective. Everyone in school knew him, and constantly related stories of him doing backflips, or the splits - either way - or impressions, jokes, anything to entertain and brighten the lives of those around him. When he was young, he was full of light and mirth and joy, which stuck with him for most parts of his adult life.

Sean was a follower of Jesus Christ. He had unwavering compassion for the underdog, and a bottomless capacity for love and acceptance of people as they were, not as they were expected or desired to be. He would hear a criticism of someone and explain that they were simply doing the best they could in that moment. He would forgive people that hurt him, over and over. It could be maddening at times, but he also had times where he needed forgiveness, too, and he recognized that, and then moved on.

He always had time to sit and contemplate, time to wonder about life, the world, human nature, anything. He knew about philosophy, religion, history… but he had a perspective that often cut straight to the central truth of an issue. He had a depth of understanding that sometimes was kept below the surface humor and cheeriness, and then it would be revealed in a statement that floored you with his insight and emotional intelligence. There were conversations that could never have been had with another person - only Sean. There were endless inside jokes and secret handshakes, where each person knew they shared a personal world with him when in his presence.

He picked up guitar as a child, and if you ever saw him play, you wondered why he wasn’t traveling the world in a band. He picked up songs by ear, and when he was in the moment, he played better than anything you could hear on the radio. He played guitar constantly, and there were times when the music he made transcended comprehension. He would get an effects pedal out for an echo, and then catch up to the echo while playing, making intricate multilayered musical tapestries that would get you lost in stunned awe. It was hard to imagine how someone could be that good, and yet be unknown to the wider world.

He had his struggles, and he fought the bad things in his world that tried to harm him. His health battles were never-ending, with a level of asthma that was far beyond what anyone should endure. He was rushed to the hospital many times. Sean often said “I’m not afraid to die. I know where I’m going, so don’t worry about me.” He was always looking forward to how things were going to be better, but enjoyed the moment, too.

He loved his son Angus more than anything, and he was always working to improve things for him. He was motivated by love, and he had big plans for the future. It is devastating that the future he was working for has been ripped away from us all.

He was a joker, a brave defender, an artist, an entertainer. There will never be enough words or pages to summarize Sean’s life, or the impact he made on the lives of those who truly knew him. He will be missed forever. I love you, dear Sean. I love you forever and always, as you said to me, too.

“Loving you changed my life - it should come as no surprise that losing you has done the same.”

One of Sean’s favorite verses is “I loved you at your darkest. Romans 5:8”