William Bill Hugh O'Keefe

William H. "Bill" O'Keefe, age 77, of Creve Coeur was Baptized into the Hope of Christ's Resurrection on Wednesday, October 8, 2014. Bill is the beloved husband of M. Jean O'Keefe, née Knarzer. They were married June 17, 1961. He is the beloved father of William (Melanie) II, Jeanne Marie (Douglas Knowling), and Patrick B. O'Keefe; dear grandfather of Sean, Wyatt, Hayley (Andrew), Kaitlyn, Tess, Eric, William, Alyssa, Kyle and the late Ryan; dear great-grandfather of Chorus; dear brother of Maurice (Joy), Danny (Suzanne), and the late Michal (Linda) O'Keefe; our dear uncle, cousin and friend.

Bill was a chemical engineer for Monsanto for 31 years. In his retirement years Bill and Jean enjoyed traveling. He was also an avid Bridge player. But Bill loved most spending time with his much loved family and friends.

Visitation will be from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m., Friday, October 10, at Kriegshauser West Mortuary, 9450 Olive Blvd, Olivette, Mo. 63132. A funeral mas will be held at 10 a.m. on Saturday, October 11.at St. Richard Catholic Church, 11223 Scheutz Road. Interment will follow in Bellerive Gardens. Memorial donations are suggested to the American Heart Association of the School Sisters of Notre Dame.

Eulogy:

Our Dad isn’t here with us today. He’s in Starkville, MS (with his brother, Mike) for Game Day. And you know that if Mississippi State beats Auburn today…He’s pulling the strings.

Our dad was such a truly lovely man (he was much better at this than I am talking in front of people– He was a big man that talked big). Some of the words I've heard used to describe him are "nice, kind, warm, wonderful, genuine and caring". I know he wouldn't want us to be sad; he would want us to live each day to its fullest (that's the way he lived his life), and he would want us to celebrate his life and remember all the good times we had with him. He brought so much joy to so many. He was the perpetual optimist…When things were bad, he’d say, “yeah, that’s crummy, but look at this over here…this is wonderful/beautiful.” Yep, our dad died this week, but I see our children, my nephew’s beautiful future bride and my precious granddaughter and I know the future is bright – They are our silver lining. He repeatedly would talk about how blessed he was, and we were all BLESSED to know him.

Bill O'Keefe met our mother, Jean Knarzer, on a blind date to the Sweet Hearts' Ball at Marion College in Indianapolis February 1960. It seems strange that their first date was to a “Sweetheart’s ball”, but it was perfect, because it was "Love at first sight" in every sense of the cliché... If you look up “soul mates”, there is a picture of our parents...well… at least there should be. My daughter, Tess, says because of her grandparents, she believes in "true love". Through 53 years of marriage they loved each other completely and unconditionally. Oh, they squabbled, but there was never a doubt about the depth of their love.

And that's the way our dad loved: fully and immensely.... To know our dad was to love him...in that, I mean that I don't know of anyone that actually KNEW dad that didn't really like him (when I say that to people, they say, "well, how could you not?") (Even our brother who isn't here today loved our dad....Dad was Bill’s "best man", not just because dad was his best friend, but also because he was the Best Man Bill knew.) With our dad: what you saw was what you got! And as it turned out, what you got was a really nice guy. I've heard you can tell what kind of person someone is, by the way they treat people who wait on them, and our dad was good, kind and polite to everyone...I never saw him treat a single person in a rude way. And for those he really loved or cared about, he made sure they knew it whenever he was with them. Every time it was time for dad to go he would hug me tight and not just tell me how much he loved me, but how wonderful I was and how blessed he was to have me in his life…I know he did this with all his family…

Our dad lived a life without regrets and he taught us so much by how he lived not just what he said. One of my favorite prayers, the "serenity prayer", I first heard from him: God grant me the patience to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, the wisdom to know the difference. Dad seemed to have this down pretty well. He wasn't happy with everything he encountered, but he faced adversity with dignity...he might thumb his nose occasionally at something he didn't like, but he rarely responded to a rude gesture with anything but a smile and a wave. And when he encountered things he wasn’t happy with, he would either try to change it or deal with it in a positive way. He also didn’t seem to have difficulty seeing the bright side of things.

Our dad wasn't a perfect man: he was a bit of a nerd – and proud of it, he did not have perfect manners, occasionally he even cheated in games (that didn’t really matter), he was rather clumsy and he was a bit of a slob, but he recognized this, and though he tried to be better/neater, he embraced being a slob. It seems to be a hereditary trait; we refer to our family, lovingly, as "the slob family" and he was our patriarch. Mishaps were common…and he often bared the wounds of his clumsiness... This didn't come just because he was old and lacking stability...he always had issues with this. And though he may not have had great balance in old age, he was very "balanced".

One of the most valuable lessons our dad taught me was Balance. He would say, "Everything in moderation. Balance is the key to happiness." And throughout his life I watched him live this principle. He did an amazing job of balancing work with family, friends and fun. Bill O'Keefe was never going to be the CEO of anything. He was not a workaholic. That's not to say he didn’t work hard and complete projects to the best of his ability. Our dad was brilliant, but like love and his family, he put everything into most of what he did, so that he could be proud of the results..."a job worth doing was worth doing well." So he worked hard at Monsanto for 31 years, and did contract work for them for several years later, but he also spent lots of time with his family, coached youth sports, came to all our activities, took us on family vacations every summer, took my Mom on dates frequently, played couples bridge, visited extended family regularly, bowled, played softball or poker with the guys when he could, went to church weekly, sang in the choir, and enjoyed it all.

We almost lost our dad about 10 ½ years ago, when his heart condition and the subsequent surgery to save his life almost killed him. His kidneys had shut down, his lungs were filling with blood and his heart was still not working properly. Fortunately, after several weeks in the ICU knocking on death’s door, the doctors figured out what was wrong and how to fix it. He spent a couple more months in the hospital, but recovered and we were all blessed with another 10 years to enjoy his company, and my son Will, Dad’s namesake, got to know his Grandpa. Our dad’s last couple weeks were great. He got to travel around and visit family and friends, vacation in Branson with three lovely ladies, Stay with his youngest grandson (who beat his grandparents in both Yatzee and Dominoes), watch Mississippi State beat Texas A & M, then move up to the number 3 rank, and watch the Cardinals win to move on to the NLCS…and we celebrated all this together.

The last thing our dad said to our mom before he went to bed Tuesday night was that he loved her and earlier that day he had told her how much fun she was to be with, how much he enjoyed her company. Though we would have preferred he were with us for at least another 10 years, he went the way he wanted to go…peacefully, in his sleep with no pain. I know when all of us think of Bill O’Keefe we will remember the warm, kind, loving, wonderful, GENTLE-man that he was.