Shirley was born on April 30, 1927, at the Old Lebanon Hospital in the Bronx, New York. Her father, Joseph Epstein, had immigrated to the United States in the early 1920s from the Minsk Province of Belarus, followed by her mother, Sarah Lulov Epstein, and Shirley’s older sister, Bessie.
Joseph, who worked as a garment presser in the U.S., died from complications from asthma when Shirley was just four years old. This was during the height of the Great Depression in the early 1930s.
Quite heroically, Sarah and Bessie, who was fourteen years older than Shirley, raised Shirley during those difficult years, and Shirley had fond memories of her childhood that she could vividly recall many decades later.
Growing up in the Bronx in the 1930s, Shirley came of age in a vibrant, now-faded world of immigrant working-class Jews. Her neighborhood teemed with life, with Yiddish spoken everywhere. She remembered peddlers selling goods in the streets, children cooling off on fire escapes, and fiddlers serenading crowds in her backyard.
As a child, Sarah would take Shirley all around New York City, riding together on the subway, to meet with friends. To Shirley’s delight, they would sometimes go to the Yiddish theatre. “She schlepped me wherever she went,” Shirley recalled, with a chuckle. “We were always going someplace. We’d come home late at night, and I’d fall asleep on her arm.”
Sarah worked as a seamstress and “really knew how to stretch a penny,” said Shirley. Sarah was always singing Yiddish songs and lullabies, and one song Shirley remembered clearly was “Rozhinkes mit Mandlen” (“Almonds and Raisins”), which, she said, was about a widow who sold goods to feed her sleeping child. Even during tough times, Shirley remembered looking forward to new clothes on the high holidays of Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur and Passover.
It could be said that Shirley also had a second mother figure: her older sister Bessie, who taught Shirley to dance and would bring her little bags of candy. “My sister was very good to me,” she said.
Going into the 1940s, the world was changing rapidly. Shirley went into her teenage years just as the Depression was ending and the U.S. was entering World War II. She remembered her teenage years being very fun: socializing with friends and going to prom dances. She started working when she was 14 years old, including one summer at a torpedo factory in Newport, Rhode Island.
In May 1947, Shirley went on a blind date with a strapping young veteran named Philip Seidman. They had grown up just blocks away from each other, but had only then met for the first time. “She was the prettiest girl I’d ever seen,” Phil would recall, glowingly, nearly six decades later.
Phil remembered sitting on a stoop in the Bronx the night after their blind date. “I just can’t forget that Shirley and how pretty she was!,” he told his friends. “I was smitten. Oh, was I smitten!”
Shirley often joked that she needed a few more dates to fully fall for Phil. But 11 months after their blind date, on April 4, 1948, this smitten couple was married at the Burnside Manor in the Bronx. They remained married for nearly 71 years, until Phil passed away in 2019.
In 1952, Phil and Shirley had their first child, Joseph. They soon moved from the Bronx to Flushing, Queens. In 1955, they had their second child, Helaine.
For the next few decades, Shirley and Phil raised their family and built a community of friends in Flushing. Shirley was an active member of the Jewish community in Flushing, and was involved in both the local Parent Teacher Association and the local theatre.
When she was 45 years old, Shirley attended night school at Queensborough Community College, making the Dean’s list, and in 1975 she was awarded an associate degree in accounting.
Phil and Shirley moved to Coram, Long Island in 1980. Shirley was active in the Long Island Democratic Organization, working for Congressman Steve Israel. In Coram, she was also involved with the Organization for Rehabilitation Through Training (ORT), a Jewish educational organization, and was awarded ORT’s Woman of the Year for the Suffolk Region in 1988.
Shirley’s older sister, Bessie Ross, who she loved deeply, died in 2007.
In retirement, Shirley and Phil moved to West Palm Beach, Florida, where Shirley became a golfer and played in a ladies league, and then on to Las Vegas, Nevada, and, finally, Brighton, New York.
Shirley lived a long and full life. She was a loving wife, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, and aunt. She was adored by her family and friends. She was a cherished member of the Jewish community. We all miss her dearly, even as we celebrate her life.
Shirley Seidman (née Epstein) was preceded in death by her husband of nearly 71 years, Philip Seidman. She is survived by two children, Joe Seidman (Nitsa Papouras Seidman) and Helaine Hunter Smith (Paul Smith); four grandchildren, Derek Seidman (Alma Carrillo), Alison Seidman, Michelle De Barros (Paul De Barros), and John Seidman; and three great-grandchildren.
Shirley will be laid to rest on Tuesday, June 25, 2024 at 11:00am in White Haven Memorial Park. In lieu of flowers please consider making a donation to Serenity House Comfort Care, 1278 Brace Road, Victor, New York 14564, https://serenity-house.org/
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