Janisteel Heather Bonner

March 28, 1944 – December 24, 2012

Jani, Heather, Sissa, Mom, Tiger, Switzie, Nana…

Whatever name she was known by, everyone would agree that she would light up any room when she walked in. Heather, as she preferred to be called more recently, was a vibrant person with an infectious amount of energy. Always with a smile, and usually with a pet, she was the epitome of the Eternal Optimist throughout her life.

Jane Steel Bonner, Jani, was born March 28, 1944 near her hometown of Byfield, Massachusetts and was the second child of Ruth and Norman Bonner. Norman was a Technical Director at Carbola Chemical and a true chemist at heart, known for his short sleeve dress shirts and ever-present pocket protector. Ruth, whom Norm met through a Vermont Theatre group, was also highly intelligent, but known more for her literary skills and for her nearly insatiable urge to converse with people. In that regard, Jani was most like her mother.

A middle child by definition, Jani was two years junior to her brother, Daniel, and two years older than her twin siblings, Marcia and Phil. All six of the Bonners lived in the parish of Byfield until 1960, at which time the family was moved by Norm’s employer to Natural Bridge, New York. While in Byfield, Jani was known for helping creatures of all types. Whether it be friends with hearts in need of mending, or animals in need of attention, she could always be counted on for TLC.

At 16 years old, Jani left her friends behind and began as a student at Carthage High School in Carthage, New York, where she quickly earned the nickname “Tiger” or “Tige”. This nickname appears to be a stark contrast to her reputation of being the female personification of St. Francis of Assisi, but only a few people, like her sister “Blondie”, know the details resulting in her nickname.

1962 proved to be a rocky year for Jani as she narrowly escaped with her life when the house provided to them by Norman’s employer, often referred to as the Carbola house, was burned to the ground. If not for the truly heroic efforts of her dog, Jani would not have made it out of the house. In fact, it is an amazing feat that the Labrador known as Sheba left her own doomed puppies, managed to turn at least one doorknob with her mouth, and successfully dragged Jani from her bed to freedom. Fortunately the family survived, but lost in the fire were some of Jani’s long time pets, including Gypsy the dog and Shuggie Baby, the talking parakeet.

It was also in 1962 that Jani married her High School sweetheart, James M. Fletcher, aka Butch. He and Jani had a baby boy that same year named Scotty, but sadly, Scotty was still-born. Although heartbroken, both parents decided to try for another child and were blessed with the arrival of Martin Joe Fletcher, yours truly, on September 27, 1963.

Butch, Jani, and Marty lived on the new property Norm acquired in Natural Bridge. More accurately, and somewhat more romantic, they lived in a trailer that was installed under the apple trees of the orchard next to the family home.

1964 was a tragic year. In April, Danny, the eldest brother, perished in a car accident while driving his car with his mother, Ruth and sister Marcia as passengers. Danny was ejected from the car and died. Marcia and Ruth were ambulanced to the local hospital where Jani was on duty as a nurse’s aide. Pause on that for a moment…

Ruth and Marcia had not yet fully recovered from their injuries when Norman, Jani’s father, died suddenly at the family home. That was June. And later that year, Butch and Jani split up as a couple and filed for divorce.

1965 marked Jani’s diagnosis of a rare neuromuscular disorder called Myasthenia Gravis, which impacts a person’s nerves and severely weakens the muscles controlled by them. MG was a disability that was previously unknown by most, yet ironically was made noteworthy that same year following the announcement that Aristotle Onassis had contracted the same disease.

Painful as the preceding years were, it could be argued that they provided the fuel for the next phase of Jani’s life, and a philosophy that she carried to the end. One of freedom, living for the day, and yes, acquiring a few (ex)husbands along the way…

The chronology of Jani’s life from 1965 onward takes us to Syracuse, New York, where she attended school and ultimately landed a job with her sister Marcia at the Telephone Company. She then met her second husband, James (Jim) Rand, and moved with Jim and Marty to Lansing, Michigan. That marriage ended around 1969, following which, Jani took Marty to stay with Ruth in Natural Bridge while she followed a friend to Dover, Delaware to start a new life there.

Marty officially moved to Delaware in 1977 after Jani, now Heather, married her third husband, Gary. Citizens Band (CB) radios were the rage then and though nobody remembers Gary’s last name, we all knew him well as “The Texas Drifter”. Given his “handle”, it didn’t surprise too many that he wasn’t part of Heather’s life for very long and that left Marty and his mother the next three years to get to know each other.

In 1980, Marty moved to Ocean City, Maryland to attend private school and work for a company he had been employed with for the previous summers. Heather also lived in Ocean City during the summers, but otherwise enjoyed travelling in her MG convertible, her Honda 125cc motorcycle or her customized van emblazoned with the word “Utopia”. She also had two mopeds and a camper trailer she used to take from place to place.

It was during those travels that Angeldust (her CB handle) met a Country Western musician named Roger Russell and they were married. They both moved to West Virginia for a while, but Heather moved back to Dover when their marriage ended around 1983. This was the same time that Marty moved to California and so Heather was on her own in Dover until she met Barry Neumann and moved to Minnesota in the late 80s.

Barry and Heather came to California in the winter of 1991 and decided to leave the Minnesota ice and snow behind to live in Long Beach. Barry moved back to Minnesota in the mid 90s and Heather spent the rest of her years in Long Beach, Big Bear, and Oceanside, California.

Heather’s final years allowed her the time to be with her son, her loving daughter-in-law, Cindy, and her newly expanded family of Ed & Wilma Kearey. She also became a Grandmother when Jacob Edward Fletcher was born on August 5, 2004 and would always smile when Jake or his twin brothers, Caleb James Fletcher and Seth Martin Fletcher (born August 10, 2007) would come to visit her.

Until her hospitalization in 2006, Heather lived a life full of the things she cherished most: laughter, smiles, adventure, family, friends, and pets. Whether human, dog, cat, bird, rabbit, fish, or turtle, (yes, she had pet turtles), we were all blessed by her presence.

Heather would never want to be forgotten, but she would only want to be remembered a certain way. Her wish would be for each of the people she knew to think of what they admired most about her, and then carry that trait forward with them as part of their own lives.

I’d like to ask a final wish

of those whose hearts touched mine,

Make a part of me

a part of you,

That I may live through time.

So as we say goodbye to Heather, Jani, Sissa, Tiger, Switzie, Nana, Mom, let us please honor her wishes and her memory by breathing in what made her special. Whether it was her Independence, Fun Loving Spirit, Seize the Day Attitude, Thriftiness, Determination, Stubbornness, Optimism, Sarcasm, Wit, or her never-ending Passion for Pets, People, The Ocean, Chocolate, Flying, Fishing, or Seafood… Together, each of us can ensure she lives on.

We’ll miss you Mom, but we promise to always smile when we think of you.

Our Father in Heaven,

Please watch over the soul

Of this most precious lady

Who has now returned to Your side

And restore for her the joy

She once knew and shared

While on this earth.

-Amen