Peggy June Ray was born in Coleman, TX June 23, 1933, to Euel Clifford Ray and Margery Butman Ray and passed away January 8, 2023, at Orchard Park Assisted Living in Odessa, TX after a lengthy battle with Alzheimer’s. She is preceded in death by her parents, her brothers Kenneth Ray and Vernon Ray, her sister Loyce Hicks, and her spouse Melvin Q. Thorne. She is survived by her sister Becky Pyburn of Abilene, TX and her sons David B. Rudd and Nathan D. (Danny) Rudd both of Odessa, TX plus several nieces and nephews.Peggy was a graduate of Coleman High School and received a bachelor’s degree from Hardin-Simmons University in Abilene, TX in 1952 when she was but 19 years old. She received her Master of Art and Education from Sul Ross State University in Alpine, TX on May 1,1977. A Doctorate in Leadership and Cultural Studies was awarded to Peggy by the University of Houston in Houston, TX in 1979.
Peggy’s lifetime of service and education began with the Ft. Worth, TX public schools. In 1955, her first year of teaching, she was named Favorite Teacher by The Ft. Worth Press. She later taught in Springfield, MO where, in addition to her normal teaching duties, she was the “Television Teacher” for a weekly science education program on the local CBS affiliate. She then taught in Waterloo, Iowa and eventually taught sixth grade at Burleson Elementary in the Ector County ISD,Odessa, TX from 1965 to 1976. She was active in many educational and civic activities locally and across Texas. She was an active, member of Belmont Baptist Church in Odessa, TX. And was a leader in expanding the church’s outreach programs. She guided the “Young Adult” program. She established a cooperative with a local halfway house to welcome reformed non-violent parolees into the church and offer the teachings of God’s word and assistance re-entering society as productive citizens. She also created specific bus routes focused on bringing underprivileged children in Odessa and West Odessa to Sunday School and Church every Sunday including students from her class and others at Burleson Elementary. Peggy resigned her position with the ECISD after the 1975-1976 school year and moved to Houston. Living with her sister she was able to dedicate her efforts full time to her studies at Sul Ross and The University of Houston. Upon the completion of her doctorate program studies, Peggy moved to Brenham, TX and resumed her education career. She accepted a position as a Principal for the Brenham ISD in Brenham, TX. It was in Brenham that she met Melvin Q. Thorne whom she wed at April Sound on Lake Conroe, TX on October 4, 1980. About this same time, she accepted an administrative position with the Spring Branch ISD in Houston, TX. The newlyweds built a new home in Katy, TX where they were to live for over 30 years. Peggy retired from the Spring Branch Schools in 1992. Her education career had many facets through the years. She had been a classroom teacher, curriculum writer, teacher appraiser, principal,and department head among other duties. She was honored to be the supervisor of doctoral interns at the University of Houston for a time. Peggy had dedicated forty years of her life to the educational, personal, and spiritual enhancement of life of others and retirement was well earned.
Retirement, however, did not mean “slow down” to Peggy. In 1989 Mel and Peggy had formed PM Publishing company specifically to publish her first book. She drew on her personal relationship in her marriage to Melvin along with extensive research to write “My Husband Wears My Clothes” which was the first book to examine the subject of heterosexual cross dressing from the perspective of the cross-dresser’s spouse. The research for the book had taken almost 9 years. Pivotal in her research was a deep study of the Bible to find an understanding of crossdressing in the context of Christianity. She had great faith in our Lord and relied on that faith to guide her on her mission to gain understanding on the subject. The book was highly praised, and Peggy was soon considered a valuable resource for those who studied crossdressing and larger transgender communities. She was always available to any member of the crossdressing community, their families, friends, or anyone else. She was always working towards better understanding between people by educating and enlightening them. She appeared as a guest on national TV programs, spoke at many conferences and other gatherings, and penned articles for various publications over the years. She authored and published three more books as well: “Crossdressing with Dignity” in 1990, “Crossdressers and Those Who Share Their Lives” in 1995 and “Who’s really From Venus? The Tale of Two Genders” in 1998.
Mel and Peggy also founded and operated Dignity Cruises which sponsored groups of crossdressers, their families, and others with interest on Royal Caribbean, Carnival, Holland America, and other commercial cruise lines. They sponsored two or three cruises per year and sailed to destinations all over the world. Spouses (or girlfriends) were cruising along, and children of all ages made the Dignity Cruises family events. The cruises also brought together participants of varied geographic, cultural, and socioeconomic backgrounds into the travel group. Another chance to educate and enlighten and Peggy always knew just how to subtly encourage the opportunity. These cruises allowed the crossdressing participants to “dress up” and go out into public safely. There was inevitably curiosity among the other passengers on board these cruises and Peggy was always available to educate and enlighten the “civilians.” Most of the passengers she visited with left with an improved attitude and more clarity in their understanding of crossdressing.
Early in their marriage Peggy and Mel set out with others to form a local chapter of Tri-Ess, which is the international society for the support of cross dressers and their families. She was instrumental in achieving the goal of launching this new chapter, Tau-Chi in the early 1980’s. Mel and Peggy were both active in and took leadership roles in Tau-Chi for the rest of their lives as health allowed. Tau-Chi followed the programs of Tri-Ess and assisted the crossdressing community with counseling in private meetings as well as groups in private home, motel rooms or any other appropriate venue. They also attended cultural events such as plays, the symphony or fine dining as a group. The members could choose to “dress up” for these events or not as they wished. Peggy and Mel and the others who formed this chapter were very pleased through the years with the successes of Tau-Chi. Peggy did notice over time however that the participants were overwhelmingly the crossdressers themselves with far fewer of the spouses and other family members participating. She knew the path to even greater success and effective support for all of those in the crossdressing community and their loved ones was to involve them all.
Seeing an opportunity to compliment and expand on the successes of Tau-Chi, Peggy was the primary driving force behind the formation of SPICE (The Spouses and Partner’s International Conference for Education) in 2000. This annual conference, where no crossdressing is allowed, focuses on marital relations and better lives for crossdressers and their spouses. This is achieved primarily by improving communication between husbands and wives. The conference welcomes all couples or even individual crossdressers or individual spouses/partners. Peggy and Mel created and funded a scholarship foundation for deserving young students in the Houston area. These educational grants were awarded annually to students seeking careers in Psychology and related fields to promote research and the care of transgender people.
Peggy’s entire life was devoted to educating others and being a catalyst for understanding in others. Peggy knew no prejudice and envisioned a world where there was none and spent all her available energies to move closer to the goal. In recognition of these efforts, Houston mayor Lee Brown declared April 17, 2001 ”Peggy Thorne Day” for her work in fostering unity in the City of Houston.
Melvin Thorne passed away suddenly October 9, 2013. By this time, the slow creeping fog of dementia had invaded certain aspects of Peggy’s mental processes. Her sons had no choice but to move her from the home that she and Mel had built together over 30 years earlier. They found her a new home in the Memory Care Center at Orchard Park Community in Odessa, TX. She loved the frequent visits from her sons and while she might not be able to tell you what she had for lunch that day, she could often relate events from their childhood days in detail.She read books to the other residents daily long past when doctors expected her to be able to do so. She was instinctively continuing to educate if she was able. The staff at Orchard Park supplied quality care to Peggy for the final decade of her life. They saw that although the burning desire to educate and enhance the lives of others had been diminished in her final days to a spark, the spark was still there.
The family wishes all persons to rejoice in Peggy’s life and be grateful to the Lord for the moments they were blessed to share with her over the years. Each person who met Peggy could not help but take with them some of her energy and desire to serve. Each of us carry her spark. It is now up to us to share this spark. We must joyfully continue the legacy for her and with her. Many sparks become a flame. May the flame of acceptance and unity continue to burn in her honor and as her legacy.
In lieu of flowers, please make a generous donation in Peggy’s memory to The Alzheimer's Association - “alz.org” - to help fund the discovery of a cure for this insidious ailment.
A memorial service will be held Thursday, January 26, 2023 at 2:00 PM in the chapel at Memorial Oaks Funeral Home; 13001 Katy Fwy. Houston, TX. She will be laid to her final rest at Memorial Oaks Cemetery beside her beloved Melvin.
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