Abuelita que estés descansando con Dios.

Abuelita siempre nos consentía y nos daba tanto amor y cariño. Recuerdo cuando yo lloraba por no ir a la escuela y ella convencía a mi mamá para que me quedara con ella y abuelito. Y cuando me quedaba con ella, ella me consentía todo el día. Abuelita era la mejor cocinera, su arroz con guisado era uno de mis platillos favoritos. Siempre la recordaré en su jardín. Cualquier planta que plantaba siempre brotaba. Extrañare verla sentada afuera diciéndome, "mi hijita" con una linda sonrisa cada vez que yo llegaba del trabajo. La extrañare tanto, pero los hermosos recuerdos que nos dejó siempre los llevare con migo.

Yesterday began with a trip to a church in Columbus as Marisa and I search for a church home. We want to find a place that will allow us to give community to our little one. The sermon left me in a pensive mood as it talked about the process of grief and the challenges that come with it. As I reflected during the sermon I was grateful to not be grieving over the loss of loved ones. I put my hand on Marisa's belly and said a prayer for my family. I did, however, think about the preparation to grieve as both our remaining grandmothers came to mind. I thought about my grandmother and her struggles after her stroke. It took me back to my first visit to Houston after her stroke and my sadness in seeing how it had changed her physically and emotionally. She cried because she saw the sadness in my face. Every time I'd see her she'd talk to me about her sadness and I knew how she struggled with finding reasons for living. So I tried to give her many. I talked to her about graduating and finally getting the degree she believed I'd get. I talked to her about moving back to Texas and finishing up my training in preparation for starting my career. I talked to her about my future family and being excited about being a father. I filled the room with as much excitement and happiness as I could and I'd live to see her smile each time I'd see her. I'd let her tell me stories of my father and her joy to see her children and grandchildren's accomplishments. When she'd get sad and tell me that I may not see her again I'd tell her that I would because I'd have another goal to accomplish and I wanted to make sure I'd come back to tell her once I did. On our way out of Houston we stopped by to pick up my father's mustang and spend some time with her. A number of us were there chatting about old times with my dad's car and all of his adventures. We talked about my goals to restore it and the preparation to become a parent. She would look at Marisa's belly as it had grown bigger and then look at me and smile. She didn't speak to me about her sadness that day. She told me she loved me and that I needed to take care of my family. I told her I'd see her in the summer to introduce her to her great-grandson, continuing on with my pattern of telling her about another of my goals for her to live to see. 

I snapped back into the sermon realizing that although I could try to prepare for the last time, I would never be. I said a prayer and we went back home to carry on with the goals for the day. Marisa is cooking up a lot of meals to freeze in preparation for the baby. She bought 4 lbs of chicken and said, make me some mole to freeze. I thought of my grandmother again as I made a dish of hers that she knew I loved. It took me back to all my visits to see her while I lived in Houston and my calls to let her know I was coming to visit. She would ask me what I wanted to eat and I would always ask her what she'd made that day. She'd make something just for me, and most of the time it was ready before I got there. Not being able to cook for me after her stroke was something that made her sad every time I'd visit. I remember a time when she got upset at her caretaker for serving up a dish with beans in it and telling her he doesn't eat beans, don't serve him that. I realized that she'd get sad even if I turned down food her caretaker made so I made sure to eat even if I'd already eaten. To try to take her away from sadness I'd often tell her about my attempts to make some of her dishes. I lived to see her laugh at my expense because I was doing it wrong. The first time I told her that I was getting good at making mole she asked me to take her through the steps of making it and she corrected me. If I told her that my mother taught me to do it a certain way, she'd tell me that my mom was wrong and so we talked about how she would do it. As I sat there eating my mole I thought of her and hoped that she would be proud because I thought it was a good one this time. 

After hearing of her passing soon after dinner yesterday evening, I realized that although I felt an intense sadness, I knew she no longer felt it. I knew that her mind was now free of her ailing body and it became so much easier to picture her doing all the awesome things I remember her doing. I lost one of my biggest motivators but I know that she'll be with me with every goal I accomplish. She'll be with me to lift me when I struggle. She'll be with me with every meal I make and hopefully have a hand in making it a good one. 

Thank you for loving me and having all the faith in me. Today I grieve but I'm strengthened by all the wonderful memories of you that make me smile. Every mole will be for you welita

Welita made the best food! One summer she took care of me and Nikki and we ordered pizza. Nikki and I ate a couple slices and were full. Welita came into the room to ask us if she could have a slice and we understood that she was offering us more so we told her no. She was shocked that we wouldn't give her a slice. We quickly cleared up the misunderstanding and laughed about it. I miss her a lot.

If I had to describe you in a few simple words, I would simply say
You are one incredible woman
Throughout my lifetime when I needed something your maternal instinct would kick in and you would come through for me in each and every situation
I cannot begin to tell you how that made me feel
Knowing in my heart that there wasn't nothing you wouldn't do for me 
It left me with such a deep appreciation and overwhelming gratitude to have such a loving and sweet grandmother like you in my life 
You mean the world to me, Grandma
All I have to do is look into your eyes to see love and adoration you have for me and I can only hope you can see the same love and adoration in my eyes
Because I promise you, Grandma, it is surely there... 
I love you, Grandma! (ME TOO)

Mi "welita", la quiero mucho. Siempre va estar en mi corazón.

Words cannot express the sorrow and sadness that I feel. Abuelita was not just a grandmother to me, she was so much more. She was my confidant, my best friend, and another mother to me. She helped raise me and helped me raise my daughter. I could always count on her to listen and give me sound advice. She was always there for anyone that asked her for help. If you wanted a home cooked comfort meal she would gladly make it for you. Her heart and her house were always open. I am blessed to have had her in my life.

Yesterday we lost our Jefita like my dad says. My Abuelita Elvia Moreno went to be with the Lord, her husband and sons last night. It's such a tremendous loss for all of us Moreno's but I think we are finding some peace knowing she is in a better place tonight and no longer in discomfort. We've been going through old photos, and thinking of all the little things she used to do for us growing up. Things you forget about when you grow up and have your own to take care of....but things we will all carry with us forever and especially these next few days as we lay her down to rest, in peace finally. From her huevitos y frijolitos that were soooooo delicious to the tortillas de harina waiting for us as we got to the house with some Parkay butter rolled up in a napkin, and folded on the bottom so the butter didn't drip out ;) to her soft wrinkled skin on her hands she'd let me pinch as a little girl, the same hands she'd use to cup our faces in when she saw us... The hands she'd use to make tamales with my Tia's every year when we were younger, and cook on the fire they built in the backyard... To her beloved big old dog Lobo, and her rocking in her chair, and her permed curly hair! Lol! I hate that I allowed life to get in the way so much.... Don't take the time you have with those you love for granted, there isn't always a tomorrow when you can go see her...I loved her and although I know she's in a better place, my heart wishes I could feel her warmth just one more time so I could tell her - te quiero muuuuuucho Welita, y darle un besote y abrazo tan fuerte para que lo supiera ❤

OBITUARY

Elvia P. Moreno

December 20, 1929 – December 11, 2016

Forest Park Lawndale Funeral Home

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