Wai Cheong Wong

No complaints, no regrets. That’s how Dr. Wai Cheong Wong, a beacon of grace, wisdom and

kindness to everyone he met, lived his life and how he left this world on November 9, 2023.

The Traveler

Born 67 years ago in Kowloon, Hong Kong, Dr. Wong moved to the United States after high

school to pursue his education. After spending time in nearly every region of the country -

South, Midwest, West Coast - he settled in the Northeast, seemingly continuing in the same

nomadic fashion, working in Maryland, New Jersey, Connecticut, and then in New York, where it

would be his destiny to meet his future wife and life compass Lifen Chang, through the close

network of friends currently known on What’sApp as the “Boys and Girls.”

“Dr. Wong,” as he was known to the Boys and Girls and his work colleagues of the past 17 years,

is survived by Lifen, of Jericho, New York, their darling daughter Jasmine Ya Hsin Wong, also of

Jericho. Dr. Wong was the youngest of 5 children, and the following are his closest family

members, many of whom survive him:

● Father Sui Cheun Wong and Mother Suk Ying Ng. His father owned a hardware store,

and his mother managed the family. Both parents moved from Hong Kong to Houston,

with his mother living in the Lone Star State for nearly the last 40 years of her life. Both

are deceased, his mother only several years ago.

● Oldest sister Lai Ying Wong (deceased), nephew Jimmy Chau (wife Christine Lin and

daughter Ianna Chau), niece Cleo Chau (husband Charles Chan), all of Hong Kong

● Oldest brother Dr. William Wai Lun Wong and sister-in-law Susannah Lee Wong, niece Dr.

Christina Wong, nephew Princeton Wong (wife Dr. Mimi Wong, son Kingston Wong and

daughter Meiomi Wong), all of Houston

● Sister Lai Chun Wong, niece Nicole Chan, both of Hong Kong

● Brother Wai Keung Wong and sister-in-law Florence Wong, nephew Gabriel Wong, all of

Houston

Dr. Wong graduated from the prestigious Catholic boys high school St. Francis Xavier’s College in

Kowloon, Hong Kong, and he would later learn that several men in his close-knit U.S. friend

family also hailed from the same alma mater. The school had a reputation for bright,

mischievous students, boys who were rambunctious in creative ways. It is commonly referred to

as a “fei jai” (teddy boys) school, full of smarty pants creative geniuses with a quirky, cocky side.

Dr. Wong certainly fit the description. Speaking to him, one could occasionally detect a twinkle

in his eyes, a sure sign that there was still fun and hilarity going on in that brain of his. In the

U.S., these boys were far from where they originated, and all were trying to make a life for

themselves in their new country. It was a source of comfort and bemusement to this mini,

unofficial East Coast Chapter of the St. Francis Xavier’s College Alumni Association. Boys and

Girls member Agnes Mak shared St. Francis Xavier’s College’s motto: “Gentle in Manner,

Resolute in Action,” and she stated, “That’s exactly who Dr. Wong was!”

Dr. Wong earned a B.S. in Chemistry from Texas Lutheran University, a M.S. in Medicinal

Chemistry from Kansas University, and a Ph.D. in Medicinal Chemistry from Purdue University.

He did his postdoctoral training at University of California Berkeley.

This wanderlust didn’t end when Dr. Wong started his family. Traveling became one of their

favorite pastimes. Dr. Wong, Lifen and Jasmine traveled to Taiwan, Hong Kong, Japan, Paris,

London, Philadelphia, California, North Carolina, and Texas, many of them multiple times as

they enjoyed their visits there.

International Gentleman of Mystery

It may come as a surprise to his close friends and colleagues of the past 30+ years to learn that

Dr. Wong was known as “Wilfred” at Kansas University. Just recently, his brother William and

sister-in-law Susannah were dumbfounded to hear that the person they always called “Wai

Cheong” is almost exclusively known as “Dr. Wong” to almost everyone in his New York work

and social circles. He did, however, encourage clients to call him “Wai.” William and Susannah

noted how uncharacteristic it was for their brother/brother-in-law to not only accept, but to

seemingly embrace, this honorary title, as he was the epitome of unassuming behavior,

someone who never put on airs. “That’s so unlike him!” said William. Why did “Dr. Wong” rarely

ask people he knew for decades to call him “Wilfred,” or “Wai Cheong” or “Wai?” Perhaps he

thought it was rude to correct the first person who started calling him “Dr. Wong,” so the name

just stuck. That is just one of the mysteries of this multi-talented man of honor who put

everyone at ease.

Dr. Wong was a wicked mahjong player. Lifen tells a tale of how Dr. Wong, playing in a mahjong

tournament, organized by his good friend, Dr. Sung Lap Kung, with students at Columbia

University in the early 1990s, won first prize and cherished the Chinese gold ingot presented to

him as winner. He continued to enjoy playing mahjong with friends, neighbors and at the many

multi-generational gatherings of the Boys and Girls Club, saddling up to the table with senior

citizens. Friends chalked up his willingness to spend time with their senior parents as just

another example of Dr. Wong’s regular gestures of self-sacrifice and considerateness,

entertaining the older folks while their kids and grandkids ate, played and joked for hours

nearby. But was that the full story? Could it be that Dr. Wong saw these as opportunities to

sharpen his skills and MJ prowess? Although Dr. Wong, like many Hong Kong children of his day,

learned mahjong by playing with parents and family members at home, not everyone mastered

it like he did. It’s a game that requires a competitive and cunning nature, again, something that

seemed at odds with Dr. Wong’s image as a carefree guy whose default mode was yielding to

others.

On Track with a Taskmaster

Without Lifen, and later Jasmine, the past three decades of Dr. Wong’s life would have been a

very lonesome journey. Their lives were sewn together by their shared pursuits and passions.

From the time Lifen and Dr. Wong met in 1992 through Lifen’s Baruch College classmate Vicky

Lee and husband Dr. Wai-Keung Tang, it was obvious that she brought much joy to his life. Lifen

was the obvious driver in their relationship, the one who confidently set the course for their

journey together. Their life-changing decision to welcome Jasmine into their world began with

Lifen’s dream of being a mother.

Although Dr. Wong was initially reluctant at the idea of bringing a child into what he felt was a

perfect relationship, he led the effort once he and Lifen decided to adopt. He used his creative

side to compile a book showing the qualities and the networks he and Lifen had in place that

would qualify them as devoted parents with a strong foundation and support system for a child.

Dr. Wong was a doting father once Jasmine came into their lives. He quickly took to his new role

and flourished in the father-daughter relationship. He and Jasmine were always seen together,

lovingly teasing one another, playing sports and quite clearly enjoying every minute of their

shared time, especially after Lifen's mother came to live with them.

The arrival of Dr. Wong’s mother-in-law was a sudden decision, and he questioned Lifen about

whether or not it was the right move for two working professionals, knowing the level of time

and commitment involved in caring for an older parent. But Lifen’s love for and devotion to her

mother was overwhelming, and again Dr. Wong found himself a hesitant supporter of a

decision. Once his mother-in-law arrived, however, Dr. Wong rose to the occasion, giving up his

bedroom so that Lifen could care for her mother 24/7, taking them to doctors’ appointments

nearly an hour away, ones in which he repeatedly had to load the wheelchair in the car and lug

it out. They even included Lifen’s mother in their continued travels.

With Lifen so fully occupied as caregiver to her mother, Dr. Wong also had to pick up some of

the parenting responsibilities that were previously handled by Lifen, like driving Jasmine to

violin practices and recitals. Father and daughter grew much closer as a result. This was where

the jokes between the two skyrocketed, often earning a “無聊” from Lifen. They had a lot of

inside jokes that no one would understand. They spent more time playing badminton together

and showing each other funny videos and laughing about them. Though they fought sometimes,

they always knew how to make up and how to get back to the jokes and fun that they always

had. They had a father-and-daughter relationship that many envied. The two were very close

and always knew how to make each other laugh. Their bond and relationship only continued to

strengthen as the time they spent together increased.

Throughout the three-plus years that Lifen’s mom lived with them, Dr. Wong never complained.

He did what needed to be done to help his mother-in-law, wife and daughter, whatever was

needed to care for his family.

This seemed to be a constant in Dr. Wong’s home life. He attended to a majority of the

household chores and repair work. “He spoiled me rotten,” Lifen said about her husband’s many

efforts to attend to her needs and care for the family. Lifen would do the food shopping, cooking

and house cleaning, while Dr. Wong took care of vacuuming, hand-washing the dishes,

washing/folding/putting away the clothes, maintaining the interior and exterior of the house,

paying the bills, attending to both cars, and even filing their tax returns. Lifen declared, “I’m the

C.P.A., but HE did the tax returns!” Go figure!

Sportsman and Volunteer

Dr. Wong was drawn to racket sports, an avid, three-times-a-week badminton player who

sparked the same interest in Jasmine; he was also known to play tennis, squash, and ping-pong.

Dr. Wong shared the badminton court with a close circle of regular players (including Boys and

Girls member Jack Chung, who had also been a colleague in the law office), his daughter and

the other parents in Jasmine’s Chinese school.

Chinese school also gave Dr. Wong an outlet for volunteering. Every Sunday, he would stand

outside the school and direct traffic. He did this right up to the time he was diagnosed with

Acute Myeloid Leukemia in April 2023. When Dr. Wong didn’t show up at his traffic controller

post the next Saturday, parents and kids were confused because he was such a fixture there.

Dr. Wong and his family were also active in Tzu Chi, an international Buddhist charity

organization focused on humanitarian aid and spiritual ministry. In addition to directing traffic,

his volunteer activities with Tzu Chi and the Chinese School involved fundraising, Chinese New

Year celebration preparations and activities as well as winter coat and food drives and

distributions.

Few are aware that Dr. Wong studied Wing Chun, the martial art form popularized by Bruce Lee,

who was an idol to the young Wai Cheong. When he and Lifen were newly married, they would

drive from Newark, New Jersey to Manhattan’s Chinatown every weekend - Lifen to learn tai chi,

and Dr. Wong Wing Chun.

At Work

Dr. Wong could boast of a long history in the pharmaceutical industry, although he never did.

When he met Lifen, he had already moved from his first job as a research scientist at Nova

Pharmaceutical in Baltimore to his next position at Synaptic Pharmaceutical in Paramus, New

Jersey. Perhaps fate was moving him closer to the love of his life, who also lived in New Jersey.

Dr. Wong rose to the position of senior scientist at Synaptic and left to accept a position as

principal research scientist in the Pharmaceutical Division of Bayer Healthcare, West Haven,

Connecticut. This set him up to become group leader at Imclone Systems in Brooklyn, New York,

where he supervised a group of 12 chemists until that company gained nationwide notoriety in

the Martha Stewart insider trading scandal.

At this point in Dr. Wong’s career, he pondered his next move. Could teaching be right for him?

Well, Boys and Girls friend Dr. Anna Cheung certainly thought so. She recruited him to work as

an adjunct professor at Manhattanville College in Purchase, New York.

At the same time he was teaching, another Boys and Girls friend, Dr. Kit Chan, saw Dr. Wong’s

potential and invited WW (as he would come to be known in the office for the next 17 years) to

work in his intellectual property law firm as a scientific advisor, helping inventors apply for

patent applications. The Law Offices of Albert Wai-Kit Chan, PLLC, in Whitestone, New York,

would be Dr. Wong’s last professional home. WW worked hard to reinvent himself in this new

role, challenging himself by taking and passing the patent bar exam so he could practice as a

registered patent agent before the United States Patent and Trademark Office, quite an

achievement for someone who had been out of the exam-based world for many years. Dr. Wong

was no stranger to innovation, himself an inventor in over 40 granted or pending patents, and

the author of more than 50 scientific journal articles and meeting presentations. Law firm

clients felt a kinship with Dr. Wong because he could understand their work and coordinate with

them to find the best way to protect their inventions using their patent applications. Dr. Wong

worked with large research institutions as well as individual inventors and, ironically, he was

treated at one of these research centers during his illness. His friend and now colleague Kit

suggested many times that Dr. Wong consider going to law school, which would have added a

layer of knowledge and prestige to his credentials, but WW demurred. Lifen recently explained

why Dr. Wong didn’t pursue this degree: He could not see himself involved in the litigation side

of the law, the part where one side has to fight with another. He enjoyed collaboration, not

conflict.

Boys and Girls

Before Dr. Wong met Lifen (and possibly in another stroke of fate that led him to her), he

discovered the Boys and Girls. The group, which at the time was called the Hong Kong Student

Scholars Society (HKSSS), came to know each other because of the Tiananmen Square Protests

in 1989. Many were students at Columbia University in Manhattan at the time of the event. Far

from their Hong Kong home and yearning to express their support of the students, the group

met to discuss the situation and how they could help from afar. They set up a table on College

Walk, the main promenade that cuts across campus, and asked people to sign a petition

supporting the students in China. Dr. Wong’s work with Nova, which later merged with Scios,

included lab work on the Columbia campus, and that was when he became part of HKSSS.

A sporty guy, HKSSS friends Wai-Keung and Vicky invited him to play squash in the Columbia

gym. In 1992, Lifen was there as Vicky’s guest, as they were graduate school classmates at

Baruch. Since both Dr. Wong and Lifen lived in New Jersey, Vicky urged Dr. Wong to drop off

Lifen on the way back to his place. In between athletics and arguing about Hong Kong and China

politics and social reform, these new HKSSS friends would travel together. A big group of them

packed into cars and drove to visit Columbia Teachers College grad student Dr. Arthur Lau, who

was teaching at Cornell University. The driver of one packed car was Dr. Wong, and Lifen was

one of his passengers. This group also visited other locales, like Cape Cod for whale watching

and Baltimore for blue crab-tasting. Lifen enjoys cooking, and she would cook a week’s worth of

meals for Dr. Wong so he wouldn’t have to work so hard. They married in 1996.

By this time, other HKSSS friends had married as well, with some starting to have children and

parents living with them. The growing group would gather regularly for food, fellowship and,

yes, mahjong! Decades of experiences and stories fill the hearts of every member of this group

of about 15 families, many of whom stayed in the Tri-State region and some who moved to

other states. Laura Ho, the group’s social media maven, gave the bunch the What’sApp name

“Boys and Girls,” and it stuck. The children in this group grew up together and now refer to

themselves as “Cousins” in their text group, even though none are biologically related.

Dr. Wong is the first of the Boys and Girls to pass away, so it’s a particularly somber time for the

group which went through so much together and who are now even considering moving closer

to each other for companionship in later life. When news of Dr. Wong’s death broke, the Boys

and Girls immediately gathered on Zoom to process what happened, discuss how they could

support Lifen and Jasmine, and reaffirm their devotion to each other as de facto family

members.

Impact

If every person Dr. Wong knew was interviewed separately about his character and his role in

their lives, it’s highly likely that the same descriptions would be repeated. He was gentle,

humble, kind, and joyful. He expressed his love with his actions and didn’t care about getting

credit for the so-very-many things he did for others. After Dr. Wong performed an act of service,

he never asked for acknowledgement or recognition.

Lifen may have expressed it best when she said she will be forever indebted to her husband for

his contribution to her life and their family. “He never complained, no matter how sick he was,”

Lifen said about the suffering he endured in the months before his passing. “He was such a

great husband. I was just so blessed.” And Dr. Wong’s wry humor stayed with him all the way to

the end. During his illness, when Lifen expressed her gratitude for giving her the best 30 years of

her life, Dr. Wong retorted, “You’re such a BS-er!”

The author David Brooks describes in his book “The Second Mountain: The Quest for a Moral

Life” how some people reach a point in their lives where joy overtakes them, and their mission

is clear. This happens only after climbing the first mountain, the one defined by academic

achievement, career success, accumulation of prized possessions, all the things that ego drives

us to pursue, that we go through a valley and a wilderness and reckon with the meaning of life.

Dr. Wong reached that second mountain long before most people, and he stayed there for the

rest of his life.

We are all better people because we had the good fortune to know this outstanding gentleman

who touched so many lives so deeply.