Compassionate and kind are two words used repeatedly by friends remembering Sara Button Conboy, who passed away on April 16, 2025 in Fresno at age 67 after a brief final battle with aggressive cancer.
Born at Fresno’s old St. Agnes Hospital on December 24, 1957, Sara grew up in Old Fig Garden and attended Fresno State Lab School, Ahwahnee Middle School, and Hoover High School before graduating from California State University, Fresno with a French major and Russian minor.
Before attending Boston University for graduate classes in Art History, Sara embarked on a multitude of world travel adventures with family and with her good school friend . (“We might have hitchhiked a couple of times.”) She spent time in Geneva and Florence, and attended classes in Aix en Provence, France and what is now St. Petersburg, Russia but at the time was Leningrad, USSR.
Living in Boston, Sara worked at Rudy’s Cafe where her thrill in meeting celebrities was piqued by those such as Kevin Bacon, Julia Child, Cher, and a number of others. But it was while employed at Steve’s Deli, where she was working to earn money for a typewriter, that her co-worker whisked her away after their shift one evening to introduce Sara to the man who would become the love of her life. Tim says the attraction was instant. Sara worried that she smelled of whitefish from traveling directly from the deli; Tim was smitten nonetheless. Within a few days he borrowed a dime from his sister to call Sara for a first date to see the Boston Celtics, the tickets for which he had had to save money for two weeks. After the game they went to Lansdowne Street Disco, though Tim’s old Volvo with the bad battery kept dying between venues. Even so, Sara was willing to go on a second date. They were married September 20, 1986 in Fresno.
Sara and Tim spent their first five years together in Boston. But getting into their car one January morning Tim saw, from the driver’s side window through the car, Sara disappear from view. When he rushed around to find she’d lost her footing on the ice and slid under the car, she implored him through tears to move back to California. Tim, working as a high-tech recruiter, convinced his boss that their company needed an office in Silicon Valley.
Sara held positions as an Executive Administrative Assistant at several Silicon Valley firms, one of which had her speaking occasionally by phone to Bill Gates’s secretary. She “mothered” 35 software engineers whom she had to often remind to go home and shower. One of her bosses allowed his office to be turned into a nursery for Tim and Sara’s first child Benjamin so that the firm wouldn’t lose her as an employee.
Sara and Tim eventually returned to Fresno where they raised their sons Benjamin and Thomas. She spent many hours involved with the Malloch Elementary School PTA and was a passionate sports mom. Though first and foremost a devoted stay-at-home mom, Sara did some work for Fresno Unified School District as a substitute office assistant, and, after their sons were grown, as a vault manager for Gottschalks Department Store. Sara was by her husband Tim’s side for many Rotary events and projects.
Sara loved attending the holiday concerts of Mr. Earl Meyers, and the performances of Fresno Community Concert Band, Fresno Master Chorale, and Coro Piccolo, where her profound appreciation of the music often moved her to tears. She was a member of the Fresno Art Museum and the San Joaquin River Parkway, and was a loyal second-generation attendee of Valley Town Hall.
The seed of a lasting friendship that was planted, as Sara told it, by the chance meeting in a bathroom at Fresno State (though it may actually have been in a classroom) eventually grew into what would come to be known as The Tea Ladies. And by “tea” what is meant is “prosecco.” Meet-ups for coffee or lunch by two or three blossomed to add new friends, real and chosen sisters, teas with full sets of china, art excursions, a six-year-belated baby shower, "emergency teas", bocce ball picnics, and often but not mandatorily, tea. A consistent feature being laughter, the conversation at one particularly memorable gathering came to center on personal diaries. Sara told of having rediscovered in abject horror a journal from her adolescence. The attendant snickers grew as she described her imperative to destroy the book. Absolutely certain that torn-out pages deposited into the trash would come flying out of the back of the departing garbage truck only to be found by aghast readers, Sara rent the paper into miniscule pieces and soaked them in water to ensure their thorough destruction. By the end of the story all listeners around the tea-set table were in utter and tearful hysterics. Maturing over the span of greater than twenty years, sharing the heartbreaks of illness, death, and divorce and the joys of marriage, new beginnings, and grand-parenthood, the group of ten women now heartbreakingly numbers nine.
Sara was a Red Sox and Grizzlies fan. She had a deep appreciation for, and was a patron of, the arts. An Anglophile and royal watcher, Sara would get up in the middle of the night to see royal events on television and text together with a like-minded friend: “You up? You watching?" "Yes and yes!” Sara loved gardening, sports, PBS, everything French, and car shows. She always wrote thank you notes. Sara loved baking and was famous for her persimmon cookies, tamale pie, and Irish soda bread. She adored her morning routine of reading through the Fresno Bee and walking their dog Leo. Sara was well-read, had sharp political acumen, and was always current on politics, a trait learned from her Fig Garden mentors. Witty and attentive in conversation, Sara possessed a wonderful sense of humor and an easy willingness for laughter. She cherished her amazing medical team, some of whom had given her care for many years.
From her psychologist father, Sara absorbed a deep understanding of people, and she was a nurturing caregiver. A dedicated and devoted mother and spouse, Sara had a deep pride in creating the sense of home for her family. She was the family “glue” who organized gatherings, adventures, and vacations, and she resolutely guarded her time for regular Zoom meetings with her grandchildren. Sara loved entertaining her steadfast circle of Tea Sisters and staying in close contact with former classmates and colleagues.
Sara was preceded in death by her parents Dr. Alan Dewitt Button and Patricia Gilmour Button, and uncle Steve Button. She is survived by her husband of almost 40 years Timothy D. Conboy; sons Benjamin and Thomas; stepsons Matthew (Karen) and Daniel (Natasha); and devoted dog Leo. Other surviving family members are brother Adam Button and sister Jennifer Button; step-grandchildren Jackie, Gabriel, and Daniel; nieces and nephews Stephanie, Addison, Ava, Alex and Asher; Aunt Carrie Ketchum; and cousins Dana, Emily, and Steve; brothers-in-law Fran (Joanne) Conboy and Ron Conboy, and sister-in-law Barbara Daigle. In addition to blood relatives, Sara’s life was marked by countless deep, long-time, sincere friendships that extended her family.
Sara’s ashes will be spread at her beloved Hood River, Oregon. A celebration of life will be held in August, date and location TBD. In lieu of flowers, you may make a donation to Fresno Art Museum, San Joaquin River Parkway, or Shinzen Friendship Garden.
DONATIONS
Fresno Art Museum 2233 N First St, Fresno, California 93703
San Joaquin River Parkway 11605 Old Friant Road, Fresno, California 93730
Shinzen Friendship Garden323 W. Cromwell, Suite 101, Fresno, California 93711
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