Paulette Marcelle Janin Thomas Arsenault, 80, of Euless, TX passed away peacefully in her sleep at 3:43am on June 20th, 2023, at Grapevine Medical Lodge in Grapevine, TX after a brave battle with Parkinson’s Disease. In the last weeks of her life, she was blessed to have so many family members and friends by her side singing and praying over her as her daughter promised.
Paulette was born on October 14th, 1942, in Nancy, France the daughter of father, Fernand Janin and mother, Marie Marguerite Toussaint as the sixth of eight children. Paulette was predeceased by her parents and her eldest brothers: Jean Louis, Françios Edmond and Christian Jean-Marie and her sister Chantal Arlette. She is survived by her brothers Michel Aimé, Daniel Jacques and Fernand Charles and many other family members in America and France. She was also predeceased by her first husband, John Thomas.
She is survived by her son, Antony Thomas and wife Sharron of Hall Summit, LA; by her daughter Jessica Gilliland and her husband Ivey Gilliland II of Southlake, TX, and grandchildren: Anthony Allen and great granddaughter, Pepper York; grandson Dilyn Allen; granddaughter Jordan Reagan and her husband Brandon; grandsons Ivey Gilliland III his fiancée Lindsey Brimhall and Andrew Gilliland. She is also survived by her eldest son, Mark Bonner and his wife Lisa of Austin, TX; grandson Logan Bonner and his wife, Savannah, and his daughter Berkley Perry; and granddaughter Mikala Bonner and her husband Matthew Seeman Sr., great granddaughter, Kaelyn Seeman and great grandson, Matthew “MJ” Seeman Jr.
Paulette is also survived by her second husband, Jack Arsenault, and his children: daughter Kathy Lessley and her husband Rick of Sammamish, WA; grandchildren Derek Lessley, Lauren Lessley-Seran and granddaughter Rylan Lessley; son Lance Arsenault and his wife Valerie of Huntington Beach, CA and granddaughter, Kristin Arsenault; daughter Sherry Arsenault and grandson Ian Arsenault and wife Roxy of Oceanside, CA.
Paulette remained in France until moving to the United States to live with her sister, Chantal, and her family in Florida in 1961 at the age of 19. Later, they all relocated to Lubbock, TX as her sister’s husband was in the US Air Force. It was here she gave birth to her first son in 1963, and chose the beautiful gift of adoption. In 1964, she was on a date at the Officer’s Club on Reese Air Force Base. It was there that John Thomas, who saw her dancing and “couldn’t take his eyes off of her”. Although they were on separate dates, he literally swept her off her feet and they married later that year on June 12th.
Coming from France, she loved expensive perfume and high fashion, she decided to study for her Cosmetology certificate; which made sense as she was always dressed to the 9’s with full hair and make-up. She would send surprise packages to family members and friends often, which always included perfumed samples from magazines with a note to put in the drawer with your “unmentionables”.
After receiving her Cosmetology certificate, she went on to give birth to a second son in 1966. They then moved to Louisiana and later celebrated their daughter being born in 1969. They moved to Hurst, TX in 1971. After settling in Hurst, she began her journey to become a US citizen. With the help of her children and family, she studied very hard and proudly received her US citizenship in 1982.
She was a devoted football, cheerleading and roller skating mom. She loved being around animals; domestic and wild. She once bottle fed a brood of baby opossums. She was an avid golfer and was very enthusiastic about all kinds of music and dancing. She had a passion for John Wayne and the characters he portrayed. She collected his memorabilia over the years including paintings, souvenir plates and a library of his movies. She enjoyed motorcycle rides, fast cars, and worldwide travel. Although she loved to sunbathe and fish in just about any watering hole available, she did not like the water, as she never learned to swim.
She was fluent in many languages including her native tongue of French as well as English, German, Spanish and Italian. She never lost her thick French accent and many times needed Jessica as an interpreter, even though she was speaking English. When playing cards with the family, she never had a problem calling someone out for “sheeting” at the card game.
She was an exceptional artist and painter having won multiple awards and competitions in art shows. She continued creating paintings for family and friends until she could no longer hold a brush. She loved to bake and try new recipes, but if it didn’t turn out perfect or had a little too much alcohol, in her words, that was “the French way”. She rarely missed playing and winning at Bingo, where the catch phrase “winner, winner, chicken dinner” became her victory cry. She loved solving the puzzles on Wheel of Fortune and if you were not already in the room or on the phone with her, you’d have to wait until the show was over.
Paulette loved sweet treats; especially eclairs, shakes or anything with chocolate. If you came to visit and didn’t have a chocolate treat for her, you would get the finger in the air to “turn around”.
Paulette and Jessica talked about what she wanted for her service years in advance. She wanted a party with bubbles, music and dancing, bagpipes and sweets. She wanted everyone to wear purple or bright colors and tell funny and happy stories about her.
Graveside services were held at the Thomas-Wren Cemetery in Coushatta, LA on June 24th, 2023, at 2pm and a Celebration of Life will be held at Gateway Church in Southlake, TX on her 81st birthday, October 14th at 10am.
We have learned firsthand through trial and error, some of the unspoken needs of Parkinson’s and dementia patients and their families. Two of the most important needs are communication and safety; the ability to communicate with their loved ones by remote audio and/or visual equipment and keeping them safe. Other important tasks are exercises in keeping their mind and body creative and active longer. At the request of our mother, we would like to help local families avoid the frustrations of roadblocks that we faced by providing them with the devices to help them while on this journey. With your help, we can provide them with a little joy and peace of mind as well. You can donate directly to Paulette’s GoFundMe Page at https://www.gofundme.com/f/paulettes-passion-for-parkinsons . These proceeds will help us to continue Momma’s love for bringing joy to others in the Parkinson’s community.
In lieu of flowers, your condolences, love, and prayers are appreciated. If you feel led, her daughter, Jessica and son, Mark would ask that you honor their mother’s desire to help others by donating in her name to DAPS, Dallas Area Parkinson Society at www.daps.org or to the Children's Home of Lubbock at www.childshome.org; to help young mothers to get back on their feet after they have chosen the gift of adoption.
Following the service we will be having her 81st birthday party at her daughter’s home
in Southlake. The family sincerely thanks you for your love and support of our "Sassy Pants". God bless.
Paulette's Celebration of Life Slideshow can be viewed here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1LwO8UzDJ8bij8lwGoURMv4k0MhcQBmA5/view
A French version of the slideshow can be viewed here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1DZ8U9R-PEu3aFI98IgH4gOfQqV5TqfXF/view
Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.shannonrufesnow.com for the Arsenault family.
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The following is the message featured from Paulette's Celebration of Life Service that took place on October 14, 2023, Paulette's 81st birthday:
There’s an old French Cajun saying that you’ll see on plaques, t-shirts, and other memorabilia if you spend much time in Louisiana, and especially around New Orleans! In my best tex-french, it goes something like this: “Laissez les bons temps rouler”, which translates to “Let the good times roll!”. In trying to research the origins of the phrase, it was hard to determine whether it originated with Mardi Gras, Fat Tuesday, or some other festive event around the city or somewhere in Cajun Country. However, in preparing for this service, I think I found the answer! The origin of “Laissez les bons temps rouler” was on October 14, 1942 in Nancy, France, the day Paulette Marcelle Janin Thomas Arsenault was born! It just seems to me that the more I discovered about her, the good times began when she was born and continued virtually uninterrupted until she took her party to heaven on June 20th. I’m sure she entered the pearly gates to trumpets playing “When the Saints Go Marching In”! Now doesn’t that seem appropriate? This was a lady who embraced life from the moment she was born, and always made a point of getting the most out of it for herself and those around her. Paulette made the most out of her first 19 years in France, but upon moving to the United States, she really came to life! Being in the presence of Paulette left people happier about life and more fulfilled, but probably left most needing to catch their breath from being in the sphere of her energy. Her family told me how she embraced her life in America, but the truth is, Paulette embraced life, wherever she was planted! But that love of life, combined with the opportunities provided by living in the USA were a match made in heaven, of which both Paulette and America benefitted. I love what the Christian motivational speaker Zig Ziglar always said, “Success occurs when opportunity meets preparation!”. I’m not sure how prepared Paulette was as a 19 year old young lady, but it seemed like coming to America suited her, and put her in a place to use her talents to do the most good! Upon coming here, she quickly adopted Jackie Kennedy as a role model because she liked her style and the way Mrs. Kennedy carried herself publicly. But she never lost sight of her love for her homeland either, and was always ready and willing to show a naïve Texan how to do things “The French Way!”. And although she loved the style and sophistication of Jackie Kennedy, Paulette always enjoyed a close relationship with her inner child, and liked doing things in a fun and playful way! You’ll hear about some of those things as we go along, and you’ve already seen some in the pictures presented in the video. The more I visited with Paulette’s family, the more I got reminded of a lady in the Bible, who though their circumstance were quite different, their lives followed some very similar paths. I’m talking about Esther, and as we explore this small book together, see if you don’t recognize some of the parallels between Queen Esther and Paulette that I do. Let’s begin in Esther, chapter 2 verses 8-10
(Read Esther 2:8-10)
Now the fact that Esther was in the King’s court at all was miraculous, because Esther was a Jewish woman in the court of a pagan king, Ahasuerus. So, like Paulette, Esther was a young woman who found herself in a strange land. And like Paulette, Esther was very beautiful, and part of her beauty was because of her native heritage. And both women found themselves in a difficult circumstance, Paulette’s being that she was pregnant and living in the foreign land of Lubbock Texas. But like Esther, Paulette sought the counsel of her Lord and made the difficult choice to put her child up for adoption. Esther went on to find the favor of King Ahasuerus as he chose her to become his wife. And likewise, Paulette soon found favor with a young airman named John Thomas, and they married and began to build a life together. And what a life it was! Sort of, you could say, “Fit for a king. . .and queen. In 1966, Paulette and John had their first child together, a son, as she began fulfilling her passions of cosmetology and art. As Air Force families tend to do, Paulette and John moved around, first to Louisiana and finally to Hurst Texas. Along the way, Paulette gave birth to her daughter, Jessica, in 1969. And just as Queen Esther enjoyed all of the joys and privileges of royal life, Paulette and John enjoyed many fun times together traveling, riding John’s motorcycle, and driving fast cars. And everywhere Paulette went, she blessed those around her with music, dancing and her love of painting and art. Paulette loved to fish, she loved to sunbathe, but she wasn’t excited about getting in the water with the fish, because she never learned to swim. She even played golf with her son Tony! Now being a queen, Esther had to be well versed in the cultures around her and have a good knowledge of how the world outside of her palace worked. And in the same way, Paulette kept herself apprised of current events around the world. She was fluent in several languages, and could even speak Texan, although her French accent always remained strong, and I’m sure added to her allure! Jessica told me a funny story about how her mom loved to play cards, but she would not be taken advantage of in a card game. In her loveliest French accent, she was quick to call someone out for “sheeting” in a card game!
Verse 18 of Esther 2 talks about how King Ahasuerus loved Esther so much that he wanted to proclaim it to his kingdom. (Read verse 18)
Again, in reading this, I couldn’t help think of Paulette, and how she loved to celebrate with friends. A good party never went to waste around her. She loved friends, and always looked for opportunities to get together. Paulette was one of those rare souls who would spend hours sending handwritten cards to friends and relatives, she loved being a beautician and bestowing that Jackie Kennedy class to her clients. And like a favored queen, she was welcomed and adored everywhere she went! Her children and family found favor with her, and her happiness and “can-do” spirit permeated the room.
Now Queen Esther, aside from the celebrations, honor, and adornments of being a queen, also had a tremendous burden to bear. As I mentioned earlier, Esther was a Jew, but had found favor with the King of Persia, Ahasuerus, along with her cousin Mordecai. But both Esther and Mordecai were following the direction of God, to be used to rescue the Jewish nation from destruction. So as a plot was revealed to Mordecia for the King’s servant Haman to destroy the Jews, both Esther and Mordecia appealed to King Ahasuerus to spare the Jewish nation and avoid the King’s own destruction at the hands of Haman. The King had such love in his heart for Esther, and respect and trust for Mordecia, that he saved the Jews from destruction, and both nations found peace and prosperity together.
(Read Chapter 8:7,8 13-17)
Following the destruction of Haman and his evil forces, the Jewish nation established the Feast of Purim to celebrate God’s deliverance and the favor of King Ahaseurus. Out of tremendous burden comes overwhelming victory. So, what does this have to do with Paulette Arsenault? Well I think quite a lot. You see, 20 years or so ago, Paulette began to suffer the dreadful symptoms of Parkinson’s Disease. But Paulette, being her positive, overcoming self, wouldn’t let the weakening of her body destroy the sunshine in her spirit. She kept on painting and baking, she learned new skills, like Bingo, and just like cards, “no sheeting!” She never let herself go, putting on her makeup and keeping her hair done and dressing up for special occasions. And she never gave up her love of music and dancing, earning the Facebook name “Sassy Pants”! She even discovered new genres of music to dance to, like Hip-Hop and rap. She continued to exercise so that she and her son Mark could maintain their “bulging biceps” together! But most of all, Paulette, like Queen Esther, wanted to make sure that her people would stay close and connected! These people included Facebook friends, assisted living staff, neighbors, her second husband Jack, and especially her children and extended family. And this wasn’t an easy task, because like so many families, life gets busy, squabbles happen, and we lose connection with one another. But with the help of her daughter, Paulette made sure that in the end, though her body was no longer in her control, that her family was together, including that son she so lovingly adopted out some 60 years ago! And I can say lovingly adopted out, because my situation is similar to yours Mark, and I can say I ended up a better man because of my mom’s difficult decision! So yes, to say Paulette was a queen in her own way is a fair assessment. She was royalty to the people sitting in this room! And just like Queen Esther, she deserves to be celebrated!
There’s another chapter of Paulette’s story that I think is really important to tell! A few years ago, as an inexperienced pastor, I realized that it’s difficult to do a funeral or memorial service for someone you don’t know. And I didn’t know Paulette. In fact, I was planning to go see her when Ivey texted me and told me not to come, because she had passed away the previous night. So I never got to meet her when she was alive. I’d seen the Facebook posts and the videos that Jessica had shared, but I didn’t really know who this lady was. But I had a prior experience of performing the funeral for my best friend’s father, also whom I did not know. And the revelation that God gave me, and that I used for my message at Bryan’s dad’s service was that it wasn’t necessary for me to know his father, because I know his son! The book of John says it this way in the 10th chapter: (Read John 10: 22-30)
I didn’t need to know my friend Bryan’s father Henry, because I knew his son, and that gave me insight to who the father was. And I think it works in similar fashion for the Mother/Daughter relationship. You see, I don’t really need to know Paulette to be able to speak in a knowledgeable way about her, because I know her daughter Jessica. And I understand Paulette’s zest for life and love for people because she passed those characteristics on to Jessica. I know Paulette’s sense of humor, her love of music, and her gratitude for the beautiful things of life, because my friend Jessica has those same desires and qualities in her life. And in the same way that our Heavenly Father wants to remove our past sins from our lives and establish a loving relationship with Him, several years ago, Jessica realized that she and her mother’s relationship was broken. It was broken due to personal pride, an unforgiving spirit, and just some choices that both Jessica and Paulette had made over the years that made it easier for the two of them to live apart than to try and nurture a relationship. But because of her understanding of God’s spirit of love and reconciliation, Jessica made a conscious decision to try and repair the relationship with her mom. And you know what she found out? Her mom was ready to do the same thing. Years of thinking, “She doesn’t want anything to do with me!” melted away through open conversation, forgiving spirits, and just the realization that “We’re better together than we are separated!” And the results of that reconciliation are what we’ve all been able to witness over the past several years, as we’ve been able to observe a daughter not just taking care of her elderly mother during her failing health. Because I truly believe, and you won’t be able to convince me otherwise, that the way Jessica cared for her mom actually extended Paulette’s life. And I know for those of us who are close to Jessica, there have been times where we thought she was doing too much, that Jessica was sacrificing her own health and well being for this lady who was declining and was never going to get any better. But Jessica never quit. If you didn’t know it, even when Ivey would convince Jessica to come home and rest, she would monitor Paulette’s room on her phone and home computer. During the COVID pandemic, Jessica and Ivey would visit with Paulette through the window of her room. Jessica made sure that her mom celebrated birthdays and holidays, that she always had music to listen too, and that she never went long without enjoying her favorite treat, chocolate and chocolate milkshakes. But the greatest gift that Jessica gave to her mom was to reconnect Paulette with Mark, the son she lovingly but painstakingly gave up for adoption some 60 years ago. I remember the conversations that Jessica and I had when she was doing the search for her long lost half-brother. She would come in so excited, because Ancestry.com believed that they had discovered something in their search. But then she would have doubts, as to whether to pursue the search and contact Mark was the right thing to do or not. And those conversations went on for awhile! But it doesn’t take a compassionate person long to realize that Jessica made the right decision and reunited her her mother with her missing child! How many of us have the opportunity to do something like that for an aging parent, and then actually do it! But persistence and determination are just two more characteristics that Paulette and her daughter have in common.
Even though at it’s foundation, the relationship between God and Jesus are quite different than any human relationship, because as we know, God and Jesus are one and the same. Paulette and Jessica are different people, but like God and Jesus, if you know one, you know quite a lot about the other. And in the same way that throughout history, God’s supreme desire is reconciliation and relationship with mankind, if there is any message that I was asked to communicate during this service, it is the necessity and desire for family and friends to connect, reconnect, and stay closer than you have ever been! If the conflict going on in Israel and Gaza right know has reminded us of anything, it’s that life can change in an instant! What we thought we had time for tomorrow, next week, or next year may not happen. The time to draw close with one another is now. The time to put away past hurts and disappointments with each other is now. The time to offer and accept forgiveness is now. Let me remind you of what verses 27-29 of John 10 say: (Read John 10: 27-29)
The time to reconcile with the Heavenly Father is now! If you want to know more about how to do that, talk to me after this service and I’ll be glad to show you how. As rich and fulfilling a life as Paulette Arsenault led, I think if we had a chance to ask her today, even with the debilitating effects of Parkinson’s racking her body, I think Paulette would say that some of her most fulfilling years were the last 5, because she was reconciled and reconnected with her family. If there are those of you who are caregivers for an aging relative, I offer you encouragement, because I know how difficult it can be. I’ve been there myself. And if you need to, call Jessica, she can provide you a world of hope! Speaking of hope, I hope I’ve been able to provide you a little insight to the person that Paulette was, and how her life had an impact on so many. And I’ll remind you that just like in knowing the father you know the son. In knowing the daughter, you know her mom!
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