Commander Loretta “Lori” Raff, US Navy retired, age 59, of Fairfax, Virginia, gently weighed anchor on April 7, 2020, slipping quietly from harbor into the seas of the Heavenly Kingdom. Lori was diagnosed with a rare type of ovarian cancer in August 2018. Even as she determinedly sought the best doctors and treatment possible, she knew that this disease was especially deadly and worked hard to prepare her seven children for a future without her. As a faithful Christian, she was a strong believer in eternal life, and she awaits a joyous reunion one day with the children who were so precious to her.
Lori was the daughter of Marietta Raff, who lives in Albuquerque, NM, and LtCol Theodore L. Raff, US Air Force, who predeceased her. She was very proud to be a New Mexican, but she also liked to say she was born “in the shadow of the ICBMs at Minot Air Force Base, North Dakota.” She grew up in many different locations and her own Navy career added to that list; during her lifetime she moved about 26 times. Lori believed living in so many different places was valuable because it taught her that she could successfully face the unknown. One of her favorite proverbs was, “variety is the spice of life,” a belief evident in decisions made throughout her life.
After graduation from high school at age 16, Lori graduated from University of New Mexico, attended Naval Officer Candidate School in Newport, Rhode Island, and was commissioned an ensign in 1982. She later completed a two-year strategic intelligence program at National Intelligence University. Her first permanent Navy assignment was Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, which she described as “paradise.” She served 20 years as a naval intelligence officer and loved to share stories of her adventures around the world. Lori worked as a defense contractor for several years, then found her second career as an officer in the CIA’s Directorate of Operations. She always said she could never imagine two more exciting and worthwhile careers. She considered herself extremely lucky to have worked for some of the most critical organizations in the world and to do her small part in service to the greatest nation in history.
But Lori regarded her greatest lifetime achievement to be raising her seven wonderful children. 22 years after giving birth to her sweet Natalie, she began a series of adoptions of what would eventually be five more children. Lori traveled overseas to find older children who desperately needed a mother. She didn’t intend to adopt so many, but said she kept finding more room in the house. She welcomed her children over a period of 14 years, when they were between the ages of two and eleven. She considered herself especially privileged to have also raised her delightful niece, Felicia, from age 11.
Lori is survived by her mother, Marietta; her children: Natalie, Felicia, Ella, Miranda, Maria, Biniam, and Moses; her granddaughter, Eden; and her son-in-law, Bob Marsteller. Lori always described herself as “the luckiest mom in the world” and she loved each of her kids more than life itself. She told friends that raising her children was her life’s true purpose and most important legacy, and she was grateful she had as much time with them as she did. Lori’s spirit lives on through each of them.
Lori will be laid to rest on April 14, 2020 at Quantico National Cemetery. This ceremony will unfortunately be limited to her children only due to pandemic restrictions. A memorial service for friends and extended family will be held at a later date, to be announced.
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