Michael Kenneth Serino, 86 of Des Plaines, a proud veteran of the United States Air Force, born December 10, 1936 in Chicago to the late Frank and Florence (nee Kanarski) Serino, passed away peacefully September 1, 2023.
Preceded in death by the love of his life and wife of 62-years Jacqueline R. Serino (nee Niemczyk); loving father of Michaeline (Mark) Nemes, Marcelline (Hector) Diaz, David (Donna) Serino, Melanie (Robert) Wessell, Jennifer Serino, and Deanna (James) Aliosius; cherished grandfather of Mellissa, Mallory, Monique, Nicole, Jared, Jordan, Charlotte, Tim, Kevin, James, Amanda, Adam, Brianna, Nicholas, Samantha, and Kaitlyn; great-grandfather of Joanna and Connor; dear brother of Dolores (late, Larry) Dorner and the late Valerie (Pat) Curley; fond uncle of many nieces and nephews.
Visitation will be Tuesday, September 5, 2023 from 3-8 PM at Oehler Funeral Home, 2099 Miner St., Des Plaines. Prayers will be said Wednesday, September 6, 2023 at 9:45 AM at the funeral home and proceed to Our Lady of Hope Church, 9711 W. Devon Ave., Rosemont for funeral mass at 10:30 AM. Interment will be in Saint Adalbert Cemetery, Niles. Memorials may be made to the National Kidney Foundation @[email protected] or the National MS Society @nationalmssociety.org.
Funeral info at OehlerFuneralHome.com or 847-824-5155
Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.OehlerFuneralHome.com for the Serino family.
Message by David Serino
Family, Friends, Faith
There are numerous paths to take when sitting and reflecting on a person’s life and attempting to boil it down to a few basic, simple thoughts and ideas.
From a backwards-looking perspective you might ask the question; “What is it that created the foundation and truly grounded a person in life?”
Conversely, if you choose to take a forward-looking perspective, the question might become; “How has a person’s past affected their present life and influenced their, and their loved one’s futures?”
In either case for dad, I tended to find my thoughts converging on three central intertwining topics - Family, Friends, and Faith.
Reflecting on Family and starting with dad, his parents, and his sisters Dolores and Valerie, the thing that seems to standout most is the unwavering bond between him and his sisters.
Fast forwarding a bit and looking at what added to the attraction that brought our dad and mom together, it’s not much of a leap to see the common value they shared in recognizing and relying on the importance in sibling relationships that they both had within their own families. These values continue within the relationships between my sisters and me, knowing we can come together and make anything happen, when necessary. Gratefully, we see these bonds carrying into the next generation with our children as well.
Add a few, okay maybe several, children to the family mix and dad’s focus shifted to that of “Provider.” This came through hard physical work as a route sales and delivery person for Pepsi. While in high school, I personally experienced this physical labor on frequent occasions when he would take me along to work on Saturdays. While he was delivering and loading Pepsi products onto the sales floor, I was relegated to the back room, sorting and loading empty bottles onto the truck. An experience that provided me with an appreciation for what is achievable through dedicated hard work. For our family this “Provider” mentality translated to knowing that we had everything we needed, and most of what we wanted, including encouragement and support for each of us to pursue our own dreams and paths in life.
While dedicated hard work was one part of the Family picture, another was the recognition that celebration and family gatherings were just as important. Dad never sought out to be the center of the social scene at celebrations, but also never shied away from or discouraged them. And with each grandchild that was welcomed into the family, celebratory engagement, maybe even to the level of instigation, became more of the norm for him. Imagine this – our dad was obsessed with shredding any junk or other mail that might have their name or address on it. Come September/October he would start saving this shredded paper in large recycle bags in the basement. Come New Year’s Eve, when several of the grandkids were over at Yanni & Pa’s and allowed to stay up until midnight to watch the ball drop, dad would bring the bags of shredded paper up into the family room and allow the grandkids to have their own “ticker-tape-like” celebration at midnight. It’s a safe bet that up until Easter, maybe even the 4th of July, we would still be finding shredded New Year’s Eve paper in, behind, and under pieces of furniture.
While this was one side of our dad that most people didn’t get a chance to see often, those that knew him well, occasionally encountered another side. This even extended to his doctors. During one doctor visit I attended with him, the conversation went like this:
“How’s it going, Mike?”
To which dad replied, “Ah, okay. But all these women in the house, always coming and going.”
To which his doctor replied, “Mike, all those women are your daughters, and you want them there and
you know it.”
And dad followed with, “But all the talking, its non-stop.”
And his doctor, with a slight shake of his head as he looked at dad over the top of his glasses, replied,
“Mike, you’re becoming a grumpy old man.”
Dad’s only response at that point was a shrug of his shoulders and a silent nod of his head in
acknowledgement.
While these and other actions and stories reveal that although he tried to hide it at times, dad did have the capacity to have fun and truly appreciated having family around, they really didn’t tell the whole story of, what I would call his “Sinister Sense of Humor” – With dad it wasn’t the belly-laugh type of humor, but more of a calculated and thought-provoking sense of humor, with the “got-ya” tell-tale sign being the smirk that would come across his face. And no one was off-limits as a target of his antics; this included Mom, his children, and especially his grandchildren.
So, then the question becomes “where did this sense of humor develop?” Based on stories that have been shared it’s a safe bet that “Friends” were a strong contributing factor to this part of his personality.
I’m not talking just casual friends, but rather “Lifelong Friends” – The friends whom you know, that no matter how long it had been since your last conversation or get-together, whenever you do reconnect, it’s effortless to simply pick-up where you last left off. We had the privilege of experiencing this with dad and his friendships with the Spades, some of which went back as early as his grade school years. Whether it was at the family picnics, maybe a sporting event or other casual get togethers, or seeing pictures and hearing stories of the multiple vacation trips they took together, or hearing about the dances and ball games back-in-the-day, it was evident that these relationships were more than just friendships.
I tend to believe that due to dad’s friendships like this, he never discouraged any of us from having friends over at the house. And with six kids, this equated to a steady flow of friends through the front and back doors, regular overnight guests, and additional contributors to make certain his observations of “non-stopping talking” were indeed, true, and accurate. And for those of us who are fortunate enough to have developed similar lifelong friends, we know we are truly blessed.
When looking at the mix between family and friends, at the center of this for dad, was our mom. When talking with any of their friends, one word that frequently came up was “inseparable”. 62-years of marriage speaks well on its own to this. But witnessing him caring for her through her illnesses, including being at her side and holding her hand until the moment she passed, demonstrated to us a level of compassion and fortitude that provided us the strength to care for him through his last months and days.
Probably the most difficult thing for dad after mom passed, was the need for him to rely emotionally more on himself. While mom was no longer at his side for him to turn to, he thoughtfully began to turn inward and relied on faith to find answers. Part of this was having faith in establishing a new norm without mom physically at his side and how this would help him navigate day-to-day living. Another part being religious faith, that there is something bigger and greater than what we have here. During his last months, he would regularly turn to praying, which at times seemed to provide comfort and probably some distraction from trying to comprehend what he was physically and mentally experiencing as his illness continued to progress.
While going through items to put together for his visitation, I came across a short prayer that seemed to sum up dad’s struggles, his reliance on faith, and his thoughts of mom during these inconceivably difficult moments. I will close with this verse titled “Tired”.
Tired
The cross is heavy, Lord
And I am weak to bear it
But I have faith:
For Thou hast promised, Lord,
That Thou wilt surely share it.
The way is rough, my God!
And I am, so weary!
But I have faith:
For Thou the same hast trod
Alone, in paths most dreary.
Make short the journey, Lord!
For I am oh, so lonely;
And I have faith
That one beneath the sword
For whom my heart yearns only.
These eyes shall greet once more
In a fairer land than this,
Where sight, not faith,
Will reign, and partings o’er,
Love may have its perfect bliss.
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