This is her oldest granddaughter, Maguire, writing. It feels necessary to introduce myself because my words will inevitably fail, as all words do. Especially any words made in an attempt to describe a truly indescribable woman. She gifted me a love for words, the least I can do is try to give those words back to her. So here lies merely an attempt, simply a glimpse at the most incredible woman I have ever known.
We’ll start as we always do. My grandmother was born July 4, 1950, a birthday she loved sharing with America. Every year, she donned red, white, and blue and claimed the fireworks as her own. The entire country celebrated her, whether they realized it or not, and she freaking loved that. When I was younger, she had this little hamster we would put out on her birthday, and she would dance to it, arms raised in front of her, giving us a little rocking back and forth, a little bouncing up and down. She would then launch into her Fourth of July Speech, which she won a scholarship competition for reciting in the 8th grade. It went something like, ‘On July 4, 1776, the Declaration of Independence was signed. It was adopted by 50 members of Congress, 50 men who, by writing their name at the bottom of this document gave to me the most wonderful birthday present I will ever receive, my American freedoms.’
She was born to Lavonia and Thomas Robinson, affectionately called Teeny and Totas. Her father passed when she was in her 40s, and she spoke of him so regularly it was like I knew him, though I never did. I’m sure if you asked my brother or my Uncle C-Bo, they would probably say every fish they’ve ever caught was owed to Grandaddy Totas. She would stand on the bow of a boat, shouting C’mon Muntsy in honor of her father until the bites came.
She married my grandfather, Kerry Campbell, her high school sweetheart, when she was 21. She put her hand on his thigh on a couch during the Orange Bowl on January 1, 1966, and the rest was history. I think that’s something people forget about Grama Cat, she was a little bit saucy. She was, and I know my grandfather would agree, the most beautiful woman. She had legs I could only dream of inheriting. She competed in the Miss Atlanta pageant at 17, coming in first runner-up after performing the most dramatic monologue the pageant had ever seen, dressed as a madwoman trapped in a cage.
She had two children, Cannon and Laurie (my mom). She wanted nothing more than to spend time with them, to spend time with all of us together. She liked the family to feel complete. We’re lucky to have had many of those moments.
Her life comes to me in anecdotes, small memories sprinkled throughout time. I could keep going, write about her time as a teacher, how she always had a hairbrush, or the cars she used to pick us up from school and drive us to our dance/baseball/art class/piano/drum lessons/voice lessons/I could go on, but I’m going to diverge from the script here.
My grandmother and I were very close. We often finished each other’s sentences, and sometimes she would call me late at night asking if something good or bad had happened because she had felt like something had from wherever she was, no matter if it was across the country or an ocean. She was always right. Something had always happened. I think she had ESP, but maybe it was just us. Anyway, I don’t think she would mind this, me putting words in her mouth.
Here is what I think she would want you to know, past the biography, the litany of her life.
She cared for you. Every person reading this, I promise she cared for you. I promise she worried about you. Worried incessantly. She wanted to know about your careers, your families, your relationships, your sports teams. She wanted to know because she thought of other people all of the time, more than she thought of herself. I don’t know that she really ever thought of herself without thinking of someone else alongside her.
She wanted you to find love. It was the thing she cared about more than anything in the world. She wanted you to find romantic love that rivals the one she shares with Papa (good luck beating them at being the best couple you’ve ever known, you can’t). She wanted you to find friendship, good friendship that helps you be the best version of yourself, ‘leads you down the right path.’ She wanted you to find your family. To love people with all of yourself.
She wanted you to do your best. She never settled for mediocrity. She was always pushing all of us to be our best versions, to strive for the greatness she knew we all held. She saw that greatness in everyone. She wanted it for you more than anything.
My grandmother wanted you to remember. To stay present, stay awake, stay alert. She wanted you to explore, to see the world you never thought you would. She wanted you to be safe. To not dive shallow, to stay off drugs and finish school. To tap the side of the airplane three times before boarding. She wanted you to raise your hand before you spoke, to push in your chair when you got up from the table. To say yes ma’am to people you respect and to respect a lot of people. To stand up for yourself. She wanted you to gossip. She wanted you to take a lot of pictures, and she wanted to see them. She wanted you to answer the damn phone and get a good haircut.
Mostly, she just wanted you to live. To live the life she taught you to live, whatever that may be. Because it’s different for all of us. For me, it’s a life of kindness. A life of caution, a life where every joy and sadness is precious, cherished. Where you hold things close and don’t let them go if you can. She wanted you to live a life where there’s always someone there to hold your hand, squeeze three times. Squeeze one back. I love you. I love you more.
She is survived by her husband, Kerry C Campbell; her two children, K Cannon Campbell (Kristin Campbell) and Laurie C Wilder (Preston Wilder); her beloved pup, Lilly Rose; her grandchildren Cathryn Maguire Wilder, Lawton Elaine Campbell, Holden Campbell Wilder, and Ella Cathryn Campbell; and her honorary grandchildren Lauren Schoenborn, Kai Williams, Reece Williams, and Landry Miller; as well as everyone else who thought of her as a grandmother. If I were to list all of those people, it would read like Matthew 1.
A celebration of life will be held on Friday, February 10, 2023, at 3pm at Heartwood Acres, 333 Harmony Road, Eatonton, GA 31024. Honorary pallbearers will be Dwight Allen III, Jacob Anderson, Trystan Bulmer, Wyatt Copeland, Jordan Dawson, Hayden Harrington, Sanders O’Kelley, and Luke Vernon Paul.
Grama Cat always said that if she were to win the lottery, she would give all the money to service animals (she was particularly fond of the allergy-sniffing dogs). In this spirit, please send donations to Dawgs Raising Dogs, an organization in which UGA students raise service dogs, in lieu of flowers. Venmo: @AthensPuppyRaisers. Donations can also be made at https://www.guidedog.org/gd/gd/gdf_donatenow.aspx, with “Athens Area Puppy Raisers at UGA” in the comment section.
Bernstein Funeral Home, Athens, is in charge of arrangements.
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