It's been 7 years of being without my Mom.
She's been with me constantly in my heart.
She's shared my joys, my hopes, and my fears.
She gently guides me through my life 
with lesson learned from childhood.
I am proud to be her daughter...

Lily Mei Ling Fong Quattrini
01/24/2023

Mom, six years later, it seems like yesterday you are still with us. I have shared all my joys and sorrows with you in my heart daily.  I believe that you are with me always...  I miss you...  I love you...
Your daughter, Lily

I have very fond memories of the Fong family from Aliquippa, Pa. I always remember our times at the Woodlawn Presbyterian Church and the Boy Scouts. May our Lord welcome into His arms Sue N Fong

Although I did not know Sue N Fong personally, I feel that I knew her through the love, care and compassion of her daughter Lily. Let me explain the three word I used.Love was watching and listening to Lily everyday when she was in California taking care of her mom. The text messages and phone calls she made to me. I knew in my heart that Lily was where she needed to be taking care of her mom.  The care she did for her mom was ever ending from the time she woke up and the time she went to bed.  She never gave up being there for her mom. The compassion was endless, knowing that she was getting weaker, and the daily care was getting harder, Lily kept on  doing what she does best helping and encouraging her mom in ever possible way. Lily and her family loved their mom and the empty void has been so hard for Lily since she came back home. My thoughts and prayers are with the whole family for the loss of their mom who they all loved dearly.  I know in my heart that their mom is looking down everyday and smiling and saying how proud she is of her family..

I recently attended the Aliquippa High School Class of 1971, 45th reunion.  I want to share with you a memory that one of my classmates had of my Mom and Dad.  

As many of you know, my folks had a Chinese laundry (surprise!) and it was a major bus stop going to West Aliquippa.  My classmate remarked how very kind and generous it was that during many a snow and rain storm, my parents allowed the riders to come into the shop to wait for the bus.

Mind you, this was 45 years ago, what a legacy for 2 immigrants, the only Chinese family in town, during a time of racial divide, to leave behind - to be remembered in such a manner.

Prouldly, I can say -- Yep, that's my Mom and Dad!

[Parts of this entry was written several days before my mother, Sue N. Fong, died.]

I sit here watching my mother slowly slipping away; she does not struggle - she is peaceful.

I start to think of times when she may have sat at my bedside, watching as I do now: that bout of chicken pox and those horrible migraines.

During the 10 months that I spent with her, I knew this moment would happen - never.  I recall her comments about being so glad she had daughters. How could this be, a daughter of China not just wanting more sons?

In this January 2016, my sisters and I diligently watch her rest.  We turn her from side to side and wipe her furrowed brow. Our tears flow large and fast. Could we be selfish to ask our Heavenly Father to restore her Mind, Health, and unique Personality?  Did she not deserve a final rest?  Indeed, we would be selfish.

I do not minimize the emotions of my brothers, their Grief is real and just as heart breaking. I see their tears; I hear their breaking voices; I feel their struggling minds seeking one last motherly, knowing smile.

My mother, Sue N. Fong, was a complex woman.  She witnessed many things in her days on Earth. She was a Wife, a Daughter, a Sister, and a Best Friend - I never knew to label her that.  No matter what I did, I always felt I could come home. She was very proud of her Family.  

So, as you see us grieve today, you know we lost one special Lady and Heaven gained one.

I love you Mom, and always will.  When Dad died nearly 13 years ago, I echo this phrase -- TO LIVE IN THE HEARTS OF THOSE WHO LOVE YOU, IS TO NEVER DIE.

Mom, you will always live in my heart.

                                                         Mummy..
We called her mummy not mom, mother, matre, or ma
D is for devoted wife. Since childhood, to the day that she passed she constantly thought of Dad. I admire that quality in her. When we thought Dad was too strict and too demanding there was always, the Shhhh, he's your Father, listen to him.
Mom and Dad were constantly thinking of their family! Just think of the incredible distance she traveled; half way around the world by herself with a two year old child to dedicate her life to our father in America in 1950, and especially to spend her entire life among strangers, first not being able to understand the language, but to simulate into the culture. To this day she was proud to say she was from Aliquippa, Pennsylvania.  Devoted her life to her husband,  our  father and dad.
There were a few constants in life back east like Brady's Run Park. Today you call it Disneyland, we called it Kennywood Park with the cousins, 14 of us all packed into a 1953 Ford. There were many examples of that  devotion.   She would say they were able to raise five children and provided each one of us tuition through college and towards becoming doctors, pharmacist, optometrist, and certified  financial planner. Mom dedicated her life towards supporting dad. Mom would remind us to visit Dad at the cemetery. Each month and on holidays never forgetting to remember Dad!
D is for the dedicated mom. Mom was always there. We didn't have many toys so we had to invent our thrills from getting cardboard boxes and sliding down the J&L hill from top to bottom (we were sort of snowboarding before the invention of the snowboards, but on dry land). There were the times she would treat us to ice cream at the Blue Bell store. We played stick ball in the freight yard where the home run was the lumber yard fence. We had to share baseball glove and bat, The Black Beauty.  Mom was constantly worried how us kids would weather the future. The yearly Christmas gifts included savings bonds which would prove helpful toward the down payment of our home.
Mom , through her prodding, showed us constant examples of love. Thank God she did not cook the oatmeal, Dad did. The daily breakfast before school was always oatmeal . Yes, we had to eat the entire bowl of oatmeal before we left for school. To this day I couldn't choke down another spoon of oatmeal.
L is for Love. Mom was always about love. I can see her now, Don, Lie seel (hold my hand)  as we crossed the street. At first as a child I would follow.   When she  was fragile, I now held her hand on our walks.  Or to bundle up because it was cold outside.  I nee mall, put on your hat before you go out. Here take this, when going back to college  in Philadelphia she would slip in the choicest cut of meat, especially the center cut pork chops or just load your car to the gills because you might starve in Philly. She would slip us money and shhh don't tell Dad. These were the physical manifestations of love. That later became words of love. She would specifically say, in English I love you! to make sure you felt her love and care. Especially, when we thought no one cared or when she would sense that it was us against the  world . 
G is for Grandma! Then there was the grandmother Love! Countless times she spent her energy raising Rebecca and Eric. First cradling them,  to cooking for them,  to singing lullabies to them.   Later, there were times of silence shattered by Eric's loud cries of Hi, Yin Yin! as we drove by or he would come to visit. Rebecca too, would call out to her in her soft voice, Hi, Yin Yin! Love was the constant lesson.
Mom wanted to make sure we would be independent, self sufficient and standing on our own two feet. That meant a strong work ethic, constant hard work to insure that if you fell down you got  back up and tried again. MOM, we Fong kids are here for you. Mom was always so proud of us. When she visited   the office, she would come up to total strangers (my patients) and proudly say; this is MY son, Don! It made my heart sing!
Mom was the messenger from God to guide us through our lives. She was the angel without wings.  Now God has called her home as job well done to give her earned wings.   Just  as  she  was  so  proud  ,   when each of the five children were inducted into the National Honor Society.    Now, she is before God to receive her angel wings.
She was the matriarch of the family.
We love you mummy, you'll always be here, in my heart! Thank you for sharing your undying love! We will be eternally grateful for the time you shared with us! We will watch over each other for you.
God bless you, God keep you and may His countenance shine upon you forever and ever. Amen.

What can I say about my mom, Sue Ngan Fong? Well, for a small person she could and would often be a big influence.  Most often she would give you the look letting you know that that you had disappointed her.  She was a hard worker putting family first while diligently doing her part in the
family business.  One of the things I remember  was  her unique way of patching holes at the elbow and knees. She usually ended with a pattern of zigzags all over the patch to insure that no hole would ever develop in that area again! She had a personal need for pockets  .  If her clothes didn't have pockets,  she sewed at least 2 pockets to meet her needs. Very few of her clothes did not need modified. 
She taught us about hard work and saving for that something in the future. I had no clue for what I saving as a little child. I really had no needs except for a pony, but where was I going to keep it?! Little did I know it was for a house later in life when she handed it over. 
I remember once a year getting dressed up at Christmas for pictures as a family and an individual one that was taken in the corner.  I never looked happy.  I always looked forward to getting a store bought prefilled Christmas stocking that was hung on the mantel with  coat hangers.  I also got to play with my battery operated police jeep cruiser which backed up when it hit an obstacle and went in another direction. Barb played with her battery operated space ship which had spinning lights and also reversed when it hit an obstacle.  Once Christmas was over , the toys went back into the box for another year.
For the longest time my mom dressed Barb and I alike probably because  it was easier to buy 2 kids close in age the same outfit. People would ask if we were twins  and I would look at them incredulously and say, Nooooooo, can't you see I'm bigger?!
Growing up , my mom didn't seem to be the huggy  type. But looking back I can remember the few times she held me while cleaning my shoes of something I'd stepped in or the time I had my tonsils  out (my throat hurt so bad). There were times when she asked what she could cook   just for
me.  When I had the mumps , she tried to comfort me by putting tiger baum on my neck. She used tiger baum on everything and it worked! 
Later in life she was more verbal of her love for her family. She was very proud of all her children,grandchildren  and great grandchildren.  She wanted us all to be happy.  She was also very generous and caring . When she sensed something was wrong she pressed to know, maybe to pray for us?
She encouraged- telling us to try again as that is how we learn.
She was quiet about her faith and prayed without making a show.  She observed tradition because it was  part of the Chinese culture.  She was tolerant although she didn't understand.
She was always doing her part, even up to the very end, helping us to help her as we cared for her. She wanted to be at home and really   appreciated   our decision to honor her wishes.
She is with Jesus and dad now.  No better place to be.  We love you, Mom. We will see you in a little while. What a reunion It will be!

Although I did not know Ms. Fong, I would like to express my condolences to her family and friends. I am so sorry for your loss. I promise that I will pray for your family tonight. (John 11:1-44)

AVIS DE DÉCÈS

Sue N Fong

25 février 1926 – 24 janvier 2016

Harry A. Nauman & Son

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