Cecilia "Lily" Kachelmyer Varley

Our beloved Cecilia “Lily” Kachelmyer Varley sadly passed away on August 21, 2022, at the age of 90, surrounded by family and friends at INTEGRIS Hospice House. Lily was born on January 28, 1932, in the Philippines, and was the oldest of five children. She lived in Del City, OK and was a wonderful wife, mother, sister, aunt, grandmother, and friend, who was always there when we needed her and had a kind and generous heart. She made lifelong friends in every place she lived including the Philippines, Michigan, Missouri, Oklahoma, Idaho, New Zealand, and Rhode Island.

When Lily was a young girl, her family lived on an island with a sugar cane refinery and an airstrip to transport refined sugar by plane. During World War II, when the Japanese invaded the island by landing on the airstrip, she fled with her family to the mountains. When the U.S. liberated the Philippines, she fondly remembered receiving a Hershey’s chocolate bar from an American soldier, and it was the beginning of her lifelong love of chocolate.

Lily loved to dance, and, in the Philippines, she performed a dance in costume at the Abellana Playground, at the age of 18. Lily mastered the Philippine folk dance Pandanggo sa Ilaw (fandango with lights) or candle dance performed by balancing a lit candle on the top of the head while holding two candles in each hand. In the late 1970s when disco music became popular with the Saturday Night Fever movie soundtrack, Lily bought the double album, and loved disco dancing.

In her twenties, Lily learned secretarial skills at the Cebu Technological University and later worked near Clark Air Force Base in Manila, Philippines. She met her first husband Frank from Mankato, Minnesota when he was in the U.S. Air Force and stationed at Clark AFB. They met on a blind date and were married on June 23, 1960. They lived at Clark AFB, where their oldest son Steve was born, then in Battle Creek, Michigan where Rick and Kevin were born, all within a little over three years, and two years later in Springfield, Missouri, their youngest Cynthia was born.

After the Air Force stationed Frank at Tinker Air Force Base, they bought a house and the family settled in Del City, Oklahoma. With relatives living in Florida, Arkansas, Minnesota, Washington, Alaska, and the Philippines, Lily was happy to settle in a city with a large Filipino community and they became like her own family. The Filipino summer picnics and pig roasts Lily’s family joined with her many friends were filled with laughter, happiness, joy, and great Filipino food. Lily was an excellent cook, and friends and family remember her lumpia, sweet and sour pork, shish kabob, pancit (bihon & Cantonese), fried rice, and chicken adobo. Lily learned Frank’s favorite dishes from her mother in-law Mary and the German dishes became favorites of her children. Lily made holidays special with delicious food, festive decorations, baked goods, candies, and she was impeccably dressed in the latest styles.

In 1970, when the kids were all in school, Lily started a job at the Base Exchange selling shoes. Wearing a size 5, a size that did not sell well and often marked down on sale, Lily amassed a shoe collection like Imelda Marcos!

After her husband Frank passed away in 1976, Lily continued their children’s Catholic upbringing, she gave them generous support, and encouraged all her children to never give up and that persistence pays off. All four graduated from college.

As a young girl in the Philippines, Lily’s dream was to travel the world. By the late 1980s, having worked at the Base Exchange for so long, Lily amassed much vacation time and spent it traveling on her first cruise to the Bahamas in 1989 with five other widowed friends, to Hawaii, Europe, and other trips within the U.S. visiting friends, before retiring in 1990. She married her second husband Tom Varley in 1991 and his children Tommy and Becca embraced and loved Lily like their own mother. Tom and Lily lived in Idaho, one month in New Zealand, while living in Idaho, and then Rhode Island. One of Lily’s favorite cruises was with Tom on the Cunard Queen Elizabeth II and one of many fabulous cruises with Tom.

After Tom passed in 2009 Lily moved back to Del City and her friends were happy have their dear friend close to them again. Lily traveled to countless countries and cities during cruises on most of the luxury cruise lines. On cruise ships, she enjoyed excursions at ports of call, dressing formally for the Captain’s Farewell Party, the champaign glass pyramids, and dancing in the ballrooms. Her friend Faye became her constant traveling companion and Lily introduced Faye to her second husband Frank while they were on a cruise.

Lily enjoyed visiting her daughter in New York City and in Golden, Colorado, especially the Mother Cabrini Shrine and the hot springs in Hot Sulphur Springs, Colorado. Lily traveled with her sons to the Philippines and on many cruises. She planned to travel to her homeland on her 90th birthday and COVID-19 put a damper on her plans. Her friend Raquel organized an outstanding party with a roast pig for this special occasion and Lily danced the night away, after being fashionably late to her party. When the party ended, Lily wanted to keep dancing and wished the night would never end.

Even though Lily loved luxury cruises, she lived a simple life at home. She was a devout Catholic and active in the Catholic Women of the Chapel (CWOC) group at St. Francis of Assisi Chapel at Tinker. As part of CWOC she visited residents of a nursing home during Christmas parties. A true romantic, she loved attending the CWOC Valentine’s Day parties and other events and danced every time. She attended Holy Days of Obligation, sang in the choir, and joined friends for prayer group meetings. She received last rites on Wednesday, August 17 and on Sunday, August 21 surrounded by family and friends. After her final last rites, she briefly opened her eyes, saw her friends, and passed peacefully 11 minutes later.

This summer, Lily planned to renew her passport and marked pages in cruise ship catalogs of trips she wanted to travel in 2023. Up until to the end of her life, she was full of life, kind, thoughtful, and generous. While in hospice, Lily made sure cousin Genevieve received the special lumpia she made with ground turkey because of her restricted diet. Lily loved to garden, shop for bargains, and cook and bake for family and friends at parties and holidays. Her favorite TV show was “Dancing with the Stars,” and we all knew not to phone her when the show was airing. Lily’s last trip was this past May to her grandniece’s wedding in Oregon, where she enjoyed reconnecting with family and dancing at the reception.

We dearly love Lily, she was a special lady with a huge heart, and everyone who knew her will miss her.

Lily was predeceased by her parents Teofila Llerin and Epitacio Dadula, mother and father in-law Mary and Francis Kachelmyer, husband Francis Kachelmyer, second husband Thomas Varley, brother Artemio Dadula, sister, Fely Dadula, sisters in-law Arlene Kachelmyer, Sandra Myer, Angela Quirk, and Diana Parcon Dadula, brothers in-law James Kachelmyer, Paul Kachelmyer, William Kachelmyer, Wesley Stelk, Joseph Kachelmyer, and John Quirk II, and nephews Steven Quirk, Wayne Kachelmyer, and Andrew Quirk.

Lily is survived by her children, Stephen Kachelmyer, Alan Richard Kachelmyer, and Kevin (Sabrina) Kachelmyer, Cynthia Tyler (Kurt Gunckel), stepchildren Thomas Varley and Rebecca Varley, brother Orlando Dadula, sister Lydia Stelk, cousin Liberty Analucas, sister in-law Lucy Kachelmyer, nieces Claire Anne Paulene, Sandra Magnuson, Lisa Wilson, Catherine Thurmond, Teri Speakman, Susan Mros, Marlene Miller, Lucita Butohan, Teofila Mancol, Llepa Katalbas, Daily Tingal, and nephews John Quirk III, Michael Quirk, Timothy Quirk, and Ordie Dadula, Thomas Kachelmyer, her grandchildren Daniel Kachelmyer and Rachel Kachelmyer, and many grandnieces and grandnephews.

The family would like to thank INTEGRIS Southwest and INTEGRIS Hospice House for the great care given to Lily, for making us feel at ease, and for making Lily comfortable during her last days.

Visitation is Tuesday, August 30, 2022, 2:00PM to 8:00PM, with the rosary at 5:00PM, at Sunny Lane Funeral Home & Cemetery, Del City, Oklahoma. The funeral mass is Wednesday, August 31, 10:00AM, at St. Paul’s The Apostle Catholic Church, Del City, Oklahoma, followed by the Commitment Service at Sunny Lane Funeral Home & Cemetery, Del City, Oklahoma. A reception follows at St. Paul’s The Apostle Catholic Church.

Prayer for Eternal Rest (The Requiem Prayer)

Eternal rest, grant unto them, O Lord,

and let perpetual light shine upon them.

May the souls of the faithful departed,

through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

Amen.