Nellie was the mother of 3 girls – Marjorie Rae, Connie Pavlicek and, Emily Gasper. In her words and, in this order – “the smart one, the funny one, and the sweet one”. She was also mother-in-law to Emily’s husband, Patrick Matott. Nellie was most proud of her children and would without reservation, brag about and show pictures of her 3 girls, her grandchildren – Jordan and Brandon Butterfield and Kathryn Martino – and her great-granddaughters, Madelyn and Mia. She passed, with joy in her heart knowing that Brandon & his wife Federica, are expecting a baby boy. To her grandchildren, she was “Grammy Ennie”.
Nellie was 1 of 5 children in her family. Her closest sibling was her sister, Marcia Tasker. Marcia and her husband, Billy, had 6 children with whom “Auntie Nellie” stayed in touch throughout the years.
As toddlers Marcia and Nellie were taken from their parents and grew up moving from place to place, orphanages and foster homes. Despite their experiences growing up they both had a strong sense of and commitment to family and they set this example for the next generations.
Through life, regardless of any distance between them, the 2 sisters remained close. In early years they penned letters to each other if they were living apart. As grown-ups and when their children were growing up, the sisters trusted and relied on each other, practicing a kind of co-parenting. Cousins have many childhood memories of times spent together at or with “Auntie Marcia” or “Auntie Nellie”.
Marcia died November 22, 2022, on Nellie’s 83rd birthday. Losing her sister left an eternal ache in Nellie’s heart. This sadness she likened only to that which she felt when the foster mother and mentor that she held dear passed in 1988. Constance Osgood was not blood-related but she was “Grammy Connie” to Nellie’s children, Marjie’s Godmother and Nellie’s middle daughter Connie’s namesake.
Some might say Nellie lived a colorful life. She married 4 times. Most recently and later in life to Jack Lentz. In 2000 she moved from NH to Tucson, AZ to be nearer to him. They married in 2005 and she moved to Phoenix where she lived until she became unwell early in September this year. She was a “bonus mom” to Jack’s son, Steven, good friends with neighbors Tom & Lucy, and Jack’s sister, Toni. To be closer to her family, Nellie recently relocated, returning to NH just before her passing. She was happy to be “home”. Jack remains in Phoenix near his family.
Despite their separation when he became unwell, she held in her heart an everlasting love for George Sheridan, and through life, even after remarrying, she omitted her given middle name and replaced it with “Sheridan”, always acknowledging it with a gracefully penned “S.” in her signature.
In her life, Nellie was happiest in the house that she and George planned and built and lived in together. She enjoyed hosting family for holidays. All in her family have special memories of Thanksgiving and/or Christmas spent with her at 494 Shaker Road, an address she was proud of. As small children, at a previous address, Marjie, Emily & Connie remember making popcorn and getting their sleeping bags out, setting up in front of the TV to watch “The Wizard of Oz”….. There’s no place like home. This house redefined “home” for Nellie, the girl who grew up as she did and she well-nested in it.
She spent hours in the garden at that house, on her own and with anyone willing and interested in being there with her. She was only ever deterred by her fear of spiders and snakes. Mother’s Day celebrations were trips to Murray Farms to purchase plants. She found peace in nature, and expressed that, to her, nature was evidence of God. Throughout her life, she intermittently practiced religion. In her later years not so much but she held strong religious beliefs in her heart and mind. A favorite song conveying related sentiments was “In the Garden” by Anne Murray.
A back injury prevented her from gardening in her later years but looking out at her garden at home in Arizona, Nellie enjoyed watching the hummingbirds visit the feeder she kept full and clean.
In NH she enjoyed fishing with Larry and when Jordan was a child she taught him to fish.
When not in the garden Nellie could be found in her home – cooking or creating. She was an early adopter of technology, a self-professed elder expert from whom others sought advice in using e-mail or the internet. Prior to that, she connected with a network of friends via CB Radio.
When not at her desk you could find her in the kitchen putting together a casserole – Tuna Wiggle or Mac & Cheese anyone? Or around the holidays, she’d make homemade chocolates for the masses. Uncle Billy, Marcia’s husband, would threaten not to allow her in their house without them during the holidays. The recipe has been handed down and making them has become a Christmas tradition. Her signature dish was apple pie and on every possible occasion, it was her contribution to the menu. Be it on the buffet or intended to be enjoyed as a treat on its own – it had a reputation in all circles as something to look forward to and not to pass up. With cheddar cheese, not ice cream or whipped cream.
Often times she’d be in front of her sewing machine, her foot on the pedal to control the needle speed, the whirring noise of it accompanying whatever tune was on the stereo as she crafted a tablecloth or apron, dresses, and bathing suits for her children in their childhood. If not the whir of the sewing needle, you could hear the click, click of knitting needles, or see the silent flow of motion as she worked with yarn to knit or crochet something. Matching, but for color, ponchos for Marjie & Connie, an afghan for “Emmy”, blankets for babies, hats she’d donate to patients going through chemo.
Inspired by the time she spent at Berea, encouraged to master a craft Nellie mastered the art of braiding rugs. She delighted in making them for friends as well as family. They are unique reminders of her, filling our hearts and homes with warm memories.
In her later years, technology kept her close to all of those she loved and cared for. Daily calls with her eldest grandson, Jordan became a thing during COVID as all in our family in various locations sought to stay connected. More often than not a game of Yahtzee or Fill or Bust would ensue. This gap in the daily routine is something all of her family will have to adjust to now. His eyes on Grammy helped tremendously as we monitored her well-being.
Games were one of Nellie’s passions. Friends and family members most likely have some memory of playing one with her and will credit her for teaching them how to play or the rules of the game. Bingo, Euchre, Canasta, Cribbage, Parcheesi, Fill or Bust, Bones, UNO, Skip Bo, Rummy, Go Fish, Heads Up, and Scrabble to name just a few. She enjoyed candlepin bowling at Boutwell’s in Concord, was lady luck at the casino, elsewhere, and everywhere she was highly competitive. If you miss-counted your Cribbage hand she’d not hesitate to score the missed points herself. Occasionally she’d allow you to score them but not without reminding you that “By rights” they were hers.
She studied English and Phys Ed at Berea College in Berea Kentucky. She often waxed lyrical about her time there. She enjoyed sports – participating when she was young, winning medals in swimming competitions, as she got older encouraging her girls to “try out for the team”, enthusiastically cheering from the sidelines during gameplay. Later in life, living in NH, she was an avid Red Sox and Celtics fan, in particular she liked Larry Bird’s buns. In Arizona, she cheered for the Diamondbacks and the Phoenix Suns.
She had a penchant for language, loved doing puzzles and crosswords. She would happily proofread text, and quickly correct spoken word – or misspoken words more like! It was important that you put the emphasis on the right sy – LA – ble. She pronounced it like that, with the emphasis on “LA”, to get the point across. She also had many unique sayings of her own, her way of commenting on a sight or situation or sharing some wisdom. These her family refer to as “Grammy-isms”.
Some funny:
Shit fire and two is eight.
Hot dog!
God bless a milk cow.
Tough titties said the kitty, but the milk's sure good.
Useless as tits on a bull.
Curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought it back.
Son of a biscuit eating dog.
Happens every time you eat.
Some frightening:
That's enough out of you.
Your ass is grass and I'm gonna mow it.
What's your beef?
Some to guide you:
Close don't count, except in horseshoes and hand grenades.
Speculation is a waste of time
Whatever, in hearing them her voice echoes.
Nellie loved music – to listen to it, to dance to it, to sing. Her alto alongside Jean Cate’s soprano, was her favorite version of “How Great Thou Art” and she would sing this, shoulders back and chin out, to find the best tone and voice. At Marcia’s graveside service, she outsang the pastor with an extended version to include all the verses.
This love of music extended to her daughters, manifesting itself in each of them in different ways. Connie, the one to demonstrate a talent to perform wrote and sings a song – “XOXO”. This has become a phrase family members exchange when they part ways, it’s our unique way of saying “love you”.
Nellie’s favorite music was classic country – George Strait, Dolly Parton, Kenny Rogers, Johnny Cash, Tammy Wynette, Willie Nelson tracks were top of her playlists, their songs definites on the soundtrack of her life. She loved a hymn, the Star Spangled Banner. Christmas carols were always sing-along. Silent Night. Jingle Bells. Santa Claus and Popcorn. Do you hear what I hear? It might be Nellie singing.
Nellie loved to remember the good times with family and friends and her travel experiences in photographs and through the years family members shared their photos with her. She got great joy out of this, delighted in seeing others happy and having fun, succeeding, and living their best life. This was her greatest source of happiness and in the sharing of photos she felt loved and “a part of it”. Receiving a postcard made her eyes light up and her collection is vast. Photo albums, photo albums, photo albums – there are so many!!
She talked often about times on the road with George or Jack, Jordan and/or Brandon, her visits to England and Ireland, and her trip to St. Croix. In a car or a camper, her adventurous soul would shine. In her 80’s, her passport is still valid.
Her favorite color was blue, in particular deep cobalt blue. All who knew her knew that her life was not without its challenges or sad times, things to be blue about. But like she’d advise others to do to get through hard times – she’d “pick up her bootstraps” and march on. “You can’t have rainbows without a little rain.” Or “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.”
Whatever Nellie did, she always did her best. In making those she loved feel loved -whether it be a card, a call, a gift or flowers, a quip or conversation - her best was surely good enough.
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