Patricia A Becker

Patricia Ann “Pat” (Matthews) Becker of Yarmouth, ME, beloved wife, mother, grandmother and great-grandmother, died on Wednesday, February 8, 2023 at the age of 86 at Falmouth by the Sea, of complications from a recent fall.

Pat was born on June 22, 1936 in West New York, NJ, the third child (after her brothers John and Robert) of Irish immigrants Patrick and Catherine (Tallon) Matthews. For much of her childhood, particularly after her father’s untimely death in 1939, she lived with Ita “Nana” (Gogarty) Tholen, her mother’s best friend and her father’s cousin, Ita’s husband Walter Tholen, and their two children William and Rose Marie in West New York. The Tholens became a second family to her. She graduated from St. Joseph’s Catholic High School in West New York in 1954, where she was a member of “the Clowns,” and went on to become a member of the first female graduating class at Seton Hall University in South Orange, NJ in 1958. Pat obtained a bachelor’s degree in nursing and began practicing her lifelong profession soon after graduation.

While at St. Joe’s, she met Joseph Charles “Joe” Becker, the love of her life. After a tempestuous courtship, Pat and Joe married on June 25, 1960 in Morris Plains, NJ. Pat and Joe had four children: John Michael (1961), Mary Kathleen (1962), Janet Ann (1965), and Patricia Mary (1967). In 1962, the family moved to Ridgewood, NJ, where they raised their children, made lifelong friends, and participated in the community, especially Our Lady of Mt. Carmel parish and elementary school, which their children attended. In 1986, Pat and Joe moved to Londonderry, NH. During a portion of the 1990s, they also spent time at a beachfront condominium in Ocean City, NJ. In 2014, they moved from Londonderry to Yarmouth, where they could be close to their daughter Mary (Becker) Highland, her husband James and their children, Carolyn, Robert, and Matthew.

Caring for others was both a profession and a passion for Pat. No matter whether she was working as a registered nurse, navigating the ups and downs of her marriage and friendships, raising her four children, volunteering at her local church, or enjoying her second act as a grandmother, Pat’s full heart, sharp wit, and thoughtful counsel were ever-present. Her diverse nursing career included positions as a traveling home health care nurse, inpatient medical and psychiatric nurse at various hospitals, and a stint as a nursing home nurse late in her career. A highlight was her decision in the 1970s to help start the first hospice care nursing agency in New Jersey, where she worked for many years. She was dedicated to the principle that, whenever possible, people should be able to die at home surrounded by their loved ones.

Family and faith were keystones of Patricia Becker’s life, as reflected in so many of the choices she made, including taking in and caring for Rose Marie’s infant son James for several years after her beloved Rose Marie’s death in 1971, cooking meals for her mother and Nana so they could remain at home near the end of their lives, devoting many volunteer hours to the food pantry at St. Thomas Aquinas in Derry, NH, and embarking on a solo trip to Ireland in the 2000s to reconnect with her relatives there. In her last years, attending Mass multiple times a week – either in person or over video - was a solace. Among Pat’s friends she counted many Catholic priests and pastors.

Pat loved all aspects of nature; her love of butterflies was obvious to anyone who had been in her home. During the 1990s, she served as a beach guide in Ocean City, NJ, informing visitors about horseshoe crabs, piping plovers, and other aspects of the seaside ecosystem. In later years, she enjoyed watching the birds, deer, foxes, and other wildlife that visited her Yarmouth home.

As her grandchildren will attest, “Pat-Pat” enjoyed her retirement years immensely. Her washcloths, blankets, and other knitting projects grace the homes of her children, grandchildren, churchgoers, and other friends. Her banana breads, Irish soda breads, and chocolate chip cookies are legendary. But what many will remember most are her sense of humor, her excellent advice, and her mastery of the fine art of conversation, whether in person, over the phone, or, lately, via Skype and Zoom. Watching Pat and Joe engage in their witty repartee, with Pat’s occasional pointed barbs (or “zing-da-zings”, as they became known) in response to one of Joe’s comments, was a joy for family and friend alike.

Patricia Becker is survived by her husband of 62 years, Joseph Becker, her son John (Mary Christin), her daughter Mary Highland (James), her daughter Jahnet Sims (Tim), her daughter Patricia “Trish” (Hiro Saito), grandchildren Carolyn Highland, Robert Highland (Katelyne), Matthew Highland, Hannah Sims, and Ahleah Sims, and great-grandchild William James Highland, and numerous nieces and nephews. She was predeceased by her brothers John Matthews and Robert Matthews, Rose Marie Tholen, and William Tholen.

Visiting hours at Lindquist Funeral Home, 1 Mayberry Lane, Yarmouth, Maine will be held from 3 p.m. to 5 p.m. on Sunday, February 12, 2023. A Mass will be celebrated at Holy Martyrs Church, 266 Foreside Rd., Falmouth, Maine on Monday, February 13, 2023 at 11 a.m.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.LindquistFuneralHome.com for the Becker family.