Anne Z. Zimmerman Schilling

On August 3, 2015 Anne Zimmerman Schilling, former elementary school teacher and librarian of 30 years in the Baltimore and Harford County school systems; devoted wife of 58 years to the late Edward M. “JACK” Schilling, Jr.; loving mother of Claire Schilling Simmons and her husband Jeff, Julia S. Holley and her husband Jayce, Victoria S. Mallcott and her husband Roland and Charles E. Schilling and his wife Molly; dear sister of the late Rebecca Jane Dronenberg and Charlotte Zimmerman Kessinger; cherished grandmother of Cecilia, Jayce, Edward Clayton, Tyler, Jordan, Laura-Anne, Connor and Sarah. Also lovingly survived by a host of nieces and nephews.

The family will receive friends in the LEMMON FUNERAL HOME OF DULANEY VALLEY INC., 10 W. Padonia Road (at York Road) Timonium, MD 21093 on Wednesday, 4-7pm. Funeral Services will be celebrated in the funeral home on Thursday, August 6 at 2pm. Interment Dulaney Valley Memorial Gardens. Expressions of sympathy may be directed in Anne’s memory to Gilchrist Hospice Care, 11311 McCormick Road, Suite 350, Hunt Valley, MD 21031. A guest book is available at www.lemmonfuneralhome.com

As hard as it is to lose one parent and grandparent you adore, how much harder is it to lose the other when you are still raw from your first grief? That’s why I am reading the eulogy Anne and Jack’s children and grandchildren have prepared. Their hearts and spirits are wrenched, and they do not trust themselves to speak. But I can read for them, and then after, speak about their mother, too. Anne Schilling was my aunt.

These are Schilling children’s and grandchildren’s farewell thoughts:

Eight weeks ago we lost our Father, and here we are again in a profound state of loss to say goodbye to our beautiful, one-in-a-million Mother. Our parents were married almost 58 years and knew each other well over 60 years. These past couple of months Mother endured unbearable heartache and sorrow with the loss of Dad. Many who helped us care for Mother in these last weeks described Mother as suffering from Broken Heart Syndrome. Mother and Dad were two halves of the same whole and one could not live without the other.

Our mother was accomplished, brilliant, strong willed, and always well-mannered. After graduating from Towson State Teachers College in 1952, she taught school for Aramco Oil Company in Saudi Arabia. She travelled extensively through the Middle East and Europe. What an incredible experience for a young woman from Hagerstown, Maryland in the early 1950s. In 1966, with 4 small children and the support of Dad, she completed her master’s degree in education. She went on to teach for more than 30 years in Baltimore and Harford County schools. She shaped and influenced countless lives, including our own, with a love of reading and thirst for knowledge. She loved teaching and the library was her passion.

Mother was forever giving us lessons on how to do the right thing, how to appreciate the gifts we were given, and how to be courageous in our most difficult times. She was such an original in the way she did things. No one we knew ever had a better sense of self. Mother would regale us with stories of her travels abroad. One story in particular that we loved hearing more than any other was about a most special meeting with Dad in Paris to discuss their future. Dad was late to that meeting and Mother loved to remind him of his tardiness!

Mother continued to instill her values in her Grandchildren. Their thoughts are these:

Grandmother had a huge effect on our lives. She taught us to be kind, courteous, and instilled in us a love of reading. These are traits that we hold dear and she was a role model in so many ways for all of us. Some of us are now working in the real world and can hear Grandmother in our heads correcting our grammar, or saying come on now—you can do this!

She always read to us great books. A few books from our childhood we remember best are Petunia, Blueberries for Sal, There’s a Party at Monas, Goodnight Moon, and The Tales of Peter Rabbit. When we grew older she would always find books that would interest us at that stage in our lives.

Grandmother and Daddy Jack attended most of our high school and college graduations. We always knew how proud of us they were and would always be there to support us.

We also cherish many great times with Grandmother and Daddy Jack in Delaware. Endless trips to the beach, Kings Ice Cream, Grand Slam for pizza, Rehoboth boardwalk, Kids Catch for toys, and crabs, crabs, crabs!

Before finishing their words, I want to return for a moment to the early 1950s. Soon after her graduation, Tia, as my sisters and I forever know her, visited her sister Charlotte and very young family in Portugal, soon after the birth of our middle sister, Elaine. We called your mother Tia because that is the word for aunt in Portuguese. I’ll always remember how much our mother and her younger sister enjoyed sitting on the shore with me and little Candy while we played in the water by the sea wall in Lisbon with the brine shrimp fizzling over our feet as the water washed up to us. I had never seen the take-charge side of Tia until the terrible moment that Candy toddled too far into the water and before our mother could reach her, a big wave swept in and a rip tide washed back out with my little sister. Tia raced into the water and called out to the fishermen coming in from the sea in their dories and commanded their attention to the little girl drowning. As we all watched, the men pulled Candy into the boat and rowed to shore, and Candy was saved. In later years, Schilling and Kessinger children became great swimmers—Julie was the best swimmer (a champion) and Elaine was the best diver, and Vicki, Claire, Chuck, Katie, and Candy also all swam competitively on swim teams—Tia had her eye on all this.

Tia could be modest about her accomplishments—whether rescuing children or pursuing a professional life. While she was working in Saudi Arabia, by chance she met the actor William Holden, who asked her about her life there and what she was doing. “Nothing special,” Tia answered, to which Holden said, “You are doing something very special.” As a teacher and librarian, Tia did noble work. She understood Dr. Seuss’s words:

“You have brains in your head.

You have feet in your shoes.

You can steer yourself any direction you choose.”

Things did happen to our brainy and footsy Tia.

My sisters and I learned from Tia and Jack what it was like to be in a family with a father, a person never to be taken for granted. (Our own father was not a part of our lives after Katie was born.) When I told my sisters recently that Jack gave me my first grown-up drink (I was 8 at the time), we discovered we all had a similar experience. Jack would pour a bottle of Coca Cola over ice cubes into a high-ball glass and presented it with panache. Such a decadent luxury for us. After our bath, we would drink our glasses of coke, and play Monopoly together on the floor with Tia and Jack until bedtime. My sisters and I look now at our husbands and recognize that we learned from Tia and Jack important lessons about what to look for in husbands, and how to have happy families: Be loving and steadfast, loyal and generous, and put one foot in front of the other until you get there.

I can hear Tia now, saying (from Seuss):

“Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.

And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?

Yes! You will, indeed!”

(and for you, Anne Schilling, 100 percent guaranteed.)

Here now are the final words of the eulogy the grandchildren have written:

We always knew how much Grandmother and Daddy Jack loved each other. When Grandmother was experiencing severe health problems, we asked Daddy Jack how he was able to do so much for her and he said “because I love her so”. It’s a love that we all aspire to have one day.

Tia’s children wrote this:

We will remember that Mother and Dad graced us with their undying love for each other. We are all forever blessed with the beautiful life they gave us and the depth of their love for each other. We are comforted knowing that in the end Dad was most certainly waiting for Mother.

Thank you.