Mary Jane Ford

Beloved wife, mother, Nonna and forever best friend, her extraordinary will to live and unmatched love will forever reside in all our hearts.Beautiful Mary Jane was born on December 5, 1942 in the Bronx, NY, to parents Peter and Jennie Filocco. She graduated from St. Helena’s High School and then went on to work for the FBI and Union Carbide. She attended Fordham University where she met and fell in love with her devoted husband and hero, Francis (Frank) Ford. Even in Mary Jane’s last moments she looked at her husband, partner, and lifelong caretaker with adoration and love. She is the love of his life and vice versa; they have stood the test of time as a team. Always graceful, strikingly beautiful and impeccably dressed, Mary Jane was deeply family oriented, sharing her Italian heritage cultural interests, and love of life and home, with those she loved.

Mary Jane and Frank were married in 1968 and lived together for a brief time in Yonkers before moving to Stony Point to raise their family, unknowing that the path ahead would be filled with love and honor, but also with many challenges. She will reside in the hearts and minds of her three children, their spouses and eight grandchildren forever: Nicole Turner, daughter, Zachary Turner, son in law and grandchildren Ava, Lyla and Liam, Kristen Chuckran, daughter and Dan Chuckran, son in law grandchildren Avery and Eva, and Christopher Ford, son and Elizabeth Ford, daughter in law and grandchildren Joseph, Sean and Alexis. Mary Jane triumphantly fought a fearless battle as a quadriplegic, the result of a spinal cord tumor, for the past 45 years. Her unprecedented will, determination, pure love and unmatched strength to be a wife, raise three children who were 2,4 and 6 at the time, work, pay bills, and gracefully face innumerable health challenges, will never be understood. Each new challenge was faced with unwavering bravery. Invasive and repetitive health procedures permanently stole her ability to do basic things, like walk, breathe on her own, eat and more recently hold up her head, or use her voice. Despite her constant uphill battle, she continued to thrive and beat the medical odds. Mary Jane’s children will forever remember a wonderful childhood that would have never been the same without their Mom. She raised them to be independent, grateful, and fully capable of caring for and raising their own families with her love and guidance. There was no problem or need that she couldn’t fix, mend, or lend advice, all while celebrating each of her children’s accomplishments, always elevating every moment over whatever struggle she was facing at the time. Always home, always at the kitchen table helping with homework, always making dinner for all and there to hear all about our day. Home was and always will be Mom. Mary Jane’s grandchildren will love their Nonna eternally and they will continue to appreciate her love as they grow.

The thoughtfulness she showered each of them, despite her own daily challenges will forever impact their lives. They will dance to music, walk on the beach, travel globally, peruse educational and professional dreams, love with abandon, cook, decorate, fulfill goals, take long drives, put family first, be patient, hug each other always, and genuinely smile from the heart. Stylish to the end, each holiday or birthday gift from their Nonna always brought amazement as to how she knows the latest trend, or way of talking easily relating to her young grandchildren as if she was next to them all the time. They love and adore her in return, never seeing her physical situation as a deterrent to hug, kiss, rub cream on her hands or beautiful soft face, paint her nails or bring over a pet or two, ranging from a frog to a rescued dog. In her final week, her family leaned in closer, knelt to read her lips and respond to her clicks to carry out her requests that always involved doing something for a member of her family. Memories of drawing her grandchildren close and reading the Night Before Christmas, cooking zucchini pizza, decorating a Halloween brownie, Easter Bunny cake or taking an interest in any art project or hobby will never be forgotten. She would shop all year long to buy the most thoughtful gifts, gifts from the heart for each of us, all the grandchildren and spouses. Wrapped Christmas presents, and other small gifts were put at each of our place settings from a chocolate Santa to lottery tickets and items for our home at the long beautifully decorated holiday dining room table. We would always say Mom, our gift is just being with you. And it’s the truth. So, so many holidays with Mary Jane and Frank at the head of the table in prayer together exchanging a long gaze together expressing what words couldn’t quite capture. Deep down, they knew as did we, that by the grace of God Mary Jane lived to see another year - thankfulness abounded, and a smile that said we “managed to get through again” and be at the table with their family.We will never fully know the full breadth of her physical suffering, and that while never imprisoning, her angelic spirit was always attached to medical equipment. Subjected to experimental painful medical procedures, surgeries, intensive care and rehabilitation treatments, Mary Jane was away for many months from her young family. When finally, home from her last major surgery in 1980, she managed to raise a family while directing the finite details of how to take care of her daily medical needs, or, in brighter moments, creating birthday celebrations and special dinners together. Always so elegant and refined, wearing delicate earrings, makeup, and clothing personally selected to hide the indignities of a medical apparatus, the way she could hold her head up or even breathe…she made the best of life. Mary Jane never wanted to draw attention. She simply wanted to be a part of our lives and go to stores or outings whenever possible, despite the odd stares, glances, due to her condition. Only Mary Jane truly handled all that she carried and managed. She carried it the best she could, for all of us. She would move her hand, however slowly across her table to touch ours. Every ounce of her being focused on always making the person in front of her feel better, and if that wasn’t enough, she would ask to wrap her arm around you, or put your head in her lap. Telling us no matter what, she is always here for us. These moments will always bring the tears of being loved to our eyes. We are so blessed to have received the abundance of affection and care that she bestowed on all of us. She taught us how to love to the very end, bringing us together by her hospital bed knowing that though her time was fading, it was more important for us to be there for each other. Baffling health professionals and care providers this past year, as to how she had the will to survive, was always a topic of discussion. Her advanced bladder cancer diagnosis this past February and long hospital stay permanently weakened her body, but never her heart.Even in her darkest days and terminal sentence,it never took her smile, never took her will to come home. There were days where she would smile so big that it was almost as if she wanted to paint a canvas in our mind as to how she wanted to be remembered. Mary Jane dedicated her life to her family. Always stating during a hospital stay that she would be back; from waiting on the front porch as children to see the ambulance arrive bringing her home or the warmth, she created by caring for us for all these years; her beautiful smile and kind heart amazed all in her life. Mary Jane led her life as independently as possible, celebrating each of life’s moments, birthdays, holidays, weddings, graduations, grandchildren, anniversaries and each one of our successes as if it was the best day and moment on Earth. Creating numerous dinners and family gatherings, she always, always drew us all close. Mary Jane was immensely proud of her family and leaves behind nothing but beautiful memories. As her health declined, she often repeated: "Life is for Living,” and she bravely lived every moment she could. Beyond all, Mary Jane somehow found a way to make peace with her personal strife and pain, never transferring the disappointment, suffering and unknown path to anyone. We will forever hold the deepest gratitude in our hearts. May you dance, walk, run, laugh,and enjoy the sun, taste of food and drink and above all peace. Forever our Mary Jane,our Mom,our Nonna and our Best Friend.“I am going home” and “I love you forever,” - MJ.

The viewing ceremony will be held on Thursday, January 12, 2023, from 3:00 pm - 7:00 pm at the Higgins Funeral Home in Stony Point with the Funeral Mass at Immaculate Conception in Stony Point, Friday, January 13, 2023, at 11am. The burial will take place after at the Gethsemane Cemetery.

The family requests donations in support of Tunnel to Towers, in lieu of sending flowers in honor of Mary Jane.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.MJHigginsStonyPoint.com for the Ford family.