Mary Louise Fochtmann

Mary Lou was born April 14, 1930, in O'Fallon, IL, to Josephine (nee Lienesch) and Earl Asbury. She spent her early years in O'Fallon, IL, along with her older brothers Earl and James (“Jim”). Her father passed away when she was 8 and, when she was 10, her mother married her husband’s brother, Ernst Asbury, M.D., who had also lost his spouse. Mary Lou and her family then joined Ernst and his daughters, Ruth and Virginia, at their home in New Baden, IL. Dr. Asbury’s office was located in their home, so Mary Lou’s piano playing was often heard by his patients and provided them comfort. In high school, Mary Lou was class valedictorian and also received music awards as an alto clarinetist and pianist. She then attended Millikin University in Decater, IL, where she was a member of Tri Delta sorority and Sigma Alpha Iota (SAI) honorary music fraternity. She earned her Bachelor of Music Education along with an English minor in 1952 and started teaching music at the elementary and middle school levels. During these teaching years, she corresponded frequently with Gerald “Jerry” Fochtmann, whom she had known in school since she was 10 years old. Gerald finished his Navy service in March 1955 and they were married in New Baden, IL on June 18, 1955. Following their marriage, they lived in Lebanon, IL, and Mary Lou continued teaching. After the birth of Laura and Jerry, Jr., a job opportunity for Gerald led them to move to St. Louis County, MO, near Creve Coeur, in 1961. Daughters Ginny and Jane soon followed, and in 1968, they moved up the road to a new house, where Mary Lou lived for 48 years before joining the Friendship Village community in Chesterfield.

Faith, family, friends, and music were always an integral part of Mary Lou's life. She attended St. Paul's Evangelical Free Church in Creve Coeur, MO, since 1971 and shared her love of music with her church family by singing in the choir and teaching Sunday School music for many years. She and Gerald were very active in the church and Mary Lou participated in Bible Studies, church council, Pastor search committees, and other volunteer opportunities and church events.

Mary Lou loved spending time with family. Growing up she had many cousins and extended family members close by and, through the years, she was excited to attend family reunions, including wonderful trips to Estes Park, CO. She was always supportive of her children and grandchildren. She made every effort to remember family with notes and cards and to attend her grandchildren's special events, including grandparents' days, sports competitions, and other events including musical, theatre, dance, and Winterguard performances. She cherished being together with family – for holidays, birthdays, or just an informal get-together.

Mary Lou was enthusiastic about sharing her love of music, as evidenced by encouraging her children’s and grandchildren’s musical pursuits and her lifetime of providing music education. There was always music in the home–children playing rhythm instruments to a rousing march, acting out little musical stories, singing while doing housework, or sweet lullabies at the end of the day. In the 1950s, she taught music at schools in Charleston, IL, Denver, CO, and Mascoutah, IL (Wherry School). She taught music at the preschool program at Mt. Zion Methodist Church in Creve Coeur, MO for 26 years (1969 to 1995), and gave private piano lessons for 48 years (1969 to 2017). Throughout the years, she stayed involved in the SAI music organization. She enjoyed all kinds of musical performances, including the St. Louis Symphony and the Muny, where she was a long-time season ticket holder. At Friendship Village, she continued playing her own piano and participated in the Chimers group.

Many other activities were important parts of Mary Lou’s life. She was active in the P.E.O. women’s organization for over 68 years. She also relished visiting museums, especially related to art and history, reading all the detailed information provided. Travel opportunities expanded her interests and intellectual horizons, whether by attending International Workshops conferences for music teachers, performers, and artists in France, Russia, Japan, Switzerland, and Hawaii or through trips with family or friends to places such as Alaska, Israel, Norway, Italy, Austria, and Germany. She always brought a spirit of adventure to her journeys as well as an innate curiosity about the arts, culture, and history of other countries.

Mary Lou was preceded in death by her husband Gerald Fochtmann, Sr., her brothers Earl (Sara “Sally”) Asbury and James “Jim” Asbury (Bonnalee “Bonnie” survives), and her step-sisters Virginia (Frank) Deming and Ruth (Robert) Bann. She is survived by her children, Laura Fochtmann, M.D. (Nisson Schechter, Ph.D.), Gerald “Jerry” (Cindy) Fochtmann, Jr., Virginia “Ginny” (Steve) Bretzke, P.E., and Jane Pierce; her grandchildren Hillel Schechter, Shula Schechter, M.D. (Aaron Brinster, D.D.S., M.D.), Caitlin (Danny) Lozano, Kevin (Kristen) Harvey, Connor (Meagan) Harvey, Elizabeth Fochtmann (partner Max Loduca), Anna (Nathaniel) Griffen, Kristen Bretzke (Austin Bench), Sarah Bretzke (partner Ethan Davis), Alex Pierce, Garrett Pierce (partner Rachel Wilhoit); and her great-grandchildren Cooper Craddick, Lane Harvey, Josie Harvey, Archer Bench, Iris Bench, and Roscoe Griffen.

In addition to her immediate family, Mary Lou will be deeply missed by her many nieces, nephews, cousins, other relatives, friends, past students, and all who knew her.

A visitation will be held on Thursday, January 2, 2025 from 4:00pm - 7:00pm, at Kriegshauser Mortuary West Chapel, 9450 Olive Blvd, St. Louis, MO 63132 and Friday, January 3, 2025 from 10:00am - 11:00am at St. Paul's Evangelical Church, 9801 Olive Blvd, Creve Coeur, MO 63141. Funeral Service to follow at 11:00am.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to St. Paul's Evangelical Free Church, Cottey College, or the Alzheimer’s Association in Mary Lou’s memory.