"Steve" Sait Bitlisli

Steve Bitlisli was my only brother, he was the first born of 3. He was 2 years older than my sister Lina, and 17 years my senior. I had the fortune of growing up with him as my big brother because he didn’t actually move out until he got married.

Steve really liked stocking up on things. I remember one time he brought home a 50 lb box of Almonds, it was the size of a computer box. He wanted my mom to make one of his favorite things, almond cookies. When my mom saw how large the box was she couldn’t believe it. Suddenly every meal had almonds in it, it was in the rice, the meat, the pastries, it was on the table, almonds were everywhere!

But with Steve, it didn’t end with that, he liked to really stock up on everything he loved. If you wanted any type of snack or sweet, you’d be able to find it in the back room of his Jewelry Store, Golden Castle Jewelers. The Fridge was always full of various beverages. He stocked up even the back of his cars, so if he ever gave you a ride, it would always include a bottle of a water, a kind bar, even a toothpick.

If you ever heard him talk about Costco, he would gladly take out his original card, he was very proud of this.

I can’t remember ever seeing him show up empty handed, it was always either fresh food from Paterson, Supplies, or some weird kind of illegal raw dairy product from an Amish store in Lancaster Pa, this man loved good stuff and he loved sharing it with all of us.

It’s perhaps my late father Hanna’s influence on Steve to like good food. You see, my mother Virginia is a great cook. Steve’s beloved wife Ilana is a great cook. They are both strong women, who run businesses, It’s no wonder my brother loved both of them so very much. Ilana and Virginia both share maternal gratitude for the births of Steve and his only son Johnny. Thank you Mom and thank you Jina.

My fondest memory of Steve and Johnny is depicted in a picture that is floating around, there’s a tent that’s made for kids that has a mesh, that my brother squeezed into to take a pic with Johnny, both my niece Olivia and nephew James are also part of this beautiful memory. Please look for it, my brother always wanted to go where the action was, he was the epitome of fun, and loved children. And children loved him. One of his latest sayings was, I want to see you all get bambinos, I can’t wait to be around all the bambinos!

His other love was Max, his dog. The funny thing about my brother was that he was an extremely clean person. So I never thought he’d be able to live with a dog, but he found a way. Whenever he walked Max, he would follow him around with dedicated wipes. And when he brought him inside, he’d also wipe his paws. His Garage was the most organized I’ve ever seen, everything is mounted on the wall, perfectly spaced out. He had every tool. His house was almost the most well taken care of, and he wouldn’t hesitate to fix a sticking door or anything that came upon his path.

Steve was handy. When we first came to America, I remember Steve and my late father hammering and sawing together the tables and workbenches to start their Tailor Shop, Elegant Custom Tailoring, in Chester, NJ. That was in 1985, next year my mother will celebrate 40 years in Chester, and that’s still same table she uses today.

There’s one thing nobody would deny, and that’s Steve’s enthusiasm for life. As a family leader, Steve helped us discover our first vacations, he understood that life wasn’t only about work. He would take us to see the fireworks, or even just a hot fudge Sunday at the McDonalds drive through.

It’s perhaps because of this enthusiasm that he would drive so fast. My brother knew every cop and for good reason.

But he didn’t only drive fast. He swam fast too.

So fast, that he saved my life when I was around ten. You see, my brother had purchased a large inflatable donut, it was black and it had a white rope tied to it around the circle. At the time, the NJ shore weather was such that the water was very cold, so I jumped on that donut and closed my eyes for a few mins. The wind was strong, and when I looked up, I could see that I was very far away from the beach, I started to panic and jumped off the blimp, it started to float away. I must have been screaming loud enough for someone to hear, that someone was my brother..He came flying in and rescued me..brought me to shore, then found a lifeguard with a boat and recovered the donut.

When we lose someone like my brother so quickly, it’s hard because we didn’t have a chance to say goodbye. An exercise that I’ll share today is to write a letter to whoever passed away suddenly..in the letter, apologize for anything you did wrong, forgive them fully for anything they did to you. And acknowledge them for who they were for you. Then read it out loud, with the intent that they are listening. G

I’m going to close with a quote from a favorite movie of mine

You see like my brother Steve, “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” – Ferris Bueller

A visitation for Steve will be held Sunday, October 27, 2024 from 4:00 PM to 7:00 PM at Goble Funeral Home, 22 Main Street, Sparta, NJ 07871. A graveside service will be held 11:15am Monday, October 28, 2024 at Laurel Grove Cemetery, 295 Totowa Rd, Totowa, NJ 07512.

In lieu of flowers, contributions in Steve's memory may be made to St Jude Children's Research Hospital by clicking the link below.