Helen Hirt Arnold

Born in Harrisburg on December 10, 1943, Helen graduated from Central Dauphin High School in 1961. She worked in education administration: first at the University Center in Harrisburg in the 1960s, and, later, beginning in the 1990s, as a Staff Assistant in the Continuing Education Department at Penn State Harrisburg (from which she retired in 2012).

In the intervening years, Helen was a stay-at-home mom to us, her children Michelle, Kevin, and Tricia. Whether at home or working, though, the role of “mom” was always her most cherished.

Calculated out, Helen likely spent years of her life at our playgroups, Scouts, tee-ball games, softball games, soccer games, music lessons, band concerts, band competitions, football games (to watch the band) … plus a few additional years driving us to and from those and other activities.

Helen cooked elaborate meals straight out of a 1950s Better Homes and Gardens cookbook for us every night. From scratch.

She baked amazing pies, too. Also from scratch.

And she did all of this effortlessly and matter-of-factly, while stylishly dressed in kicky fashions and with Her Amazing Hair™ immaculately coiffed.

As we grew up and were able to see her as a person (and not just someone who drove and fed us), we were awed to discover and appreciate how truly wonderful our mom really was.

Helen was kind, welcoming, and accepting.

Her sincere respect, friendship, and love was given to people of all races, nationalities, and sexual orientations. Growing up, friends would tell us of other parents who had kicked them out of the house, but our mom invited them to stay for dinner. When we met our significant others, she welcomed them into the family – and fully recognized them as being part of the family – quickly and with open arms. Additionally, as a member of the Evangelical United Methodist Church in Middletown, Helen visited shut-ins with her friend Kathy Frisbie.

Helen was resilient and strong.

After our father died in 1995 and throughout her illness, she never complained. She took care of business, she fought, and she did what she had to do, with her primary focus remaining, as always, on her family. And then she made sure we had eaten.

Helen was level-headed, discerning, and smart.

She applied a rational logic to everything and could quickly tell when something didn’t add up. Whether in response to “No, Mom, I wasn’t looking for my Christmas gifts in your closet” to happenings at work or to run-arounds from service providers, she could administer a side-eye so deftly that one often didn’t even know one was being side-eyed. She rarely lost her cool, she never swore (that is, if you don’t count utterances of “Horsefeathers!” and, let’s be honest, we don’t), and she never said an unkind word about anyone.

Helen was kind of obsessed with food.

Her day revolved around meals, with conversations about the next one often starting at least two hours before it. “What do you want to eat?” “It’s almost time to eat.” “Should I put it out to thaw?” “I thought we’d have that tomorrow night.” “Did you get enough to eat?” “You need to eat more than that!”

When asked about her day on the phone, she’d do ten minutes on what she ate that day. And she always knew how long (and on what temperature) to microwave something.

Helen was funny.

She referred to the television “Firestick” as the “Fishstick,” and family meals typically resulted in all participants reduced to sobbing laughter. At her table, we laughed as much as we ate.

Helen was cool and fun.

She loved music -- AM Gold, soft rock, and ‘80s hits. Her favorite band was Air Supply (who we jokingly accused her of stalking), and, over the years, she went with us to see concerts by artists such as Duran Duran, Billy Bragg, U2, Rick Springfield, the Turtles, Dionne Warwick, and Olivia Newton-John. She saw Bobby Vinton many times with her decades-long best friend, Jane Wagner.

She also enjoyed watching Phillies baseball, HGTV, and anything staring Nathan Fillion, as well as doing puzzles and making family photo albums.

Helen often said that she had the “best kids in the entire world” … but that’s only because we had The Best Mom In The Entire World.

She was such an absolute joy.

Helen is survived by her children Michelle (and her partner Daniel Newman), Kevin (and his wife Bambi [Bechtel] Arnold), and Tricia Arnold (and her husband Stephen Knowles); her two grandchildren, William and Toby Arnold; her cat, Sasha; her best friend, Jane Wagner (and her husband Larry Wagner); her close friend Kathy Frisbie (and her husband Ken Frisbie); her family of friends from Penn State Harrisburg; her extended family; and her friends and neighbors from all aspects of her life. Helen was preceded in death by her husband, Norman M. Arnold, Jr., a long-time photographer (via Allied Pix, Inc.) for The Patriot News; her parents, Kathleen E. (Nickel) and William F. Hirt; her parents-in-law, Carolyn G. (Crossley) and Norman M. Arnold, Sr.; her duck, Cuddles; her cats, Thomas J. “TJ” and Tiger; and her 1967 metallic light blue Dodge Dart, Bluebird.

A memorial service will be held at Neill Funeral Home on Derry Street in Harrisburg on December 27th at 11am (with visitation occurring from 9:30am to 11am). Interment will be at Rolling Green Cemetery in Camp Hill following the service.

In lieu of flowers, we ask that donations be made, in her memory, to the American Lung Association or the Central Pennsylvania Food Bank.

Our hearts are completely broken, we already miss her immeasurably, and we thank her for everything.

We love you so much, Mommy.