Afton Romaine Barber Romney was a loving wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. She passed away peacefully in her sleep on Tuesday, December 27, 2022, in Irvine, California. Romaine was 97 years old. She lived a long and full life and leaves a legacy of precious memories.
Romaine was born on November 15, 1925, in Salt Lake City, Utah, to Wilford Whitaker Barber and Alta Robinson Barber. She had two older brothers, James Wilford Barber (Betty Jo) and Donn Richard Barber (Elsie). Romaine grew up in Denver, Colorado, enjoying the mountain views and winter snow. She often retold stories of her brothers playing with her in the snow or her parents taking her for a ride in the family’s Ford Model A. Romaine attended East High School in Denver and was an excellent student with a bright imagination. She learned humility and charity from her parents while growing up during the aftermath of the Great Depression. Her father was a pediatrician who made countless house calls during the depression era and the polio epidemic, often accepting food or other in-kind items from families that couldn’t pay for medical services. These early lessons provided the foundation for Romaine’s deep sense of compassion and charity.
In 1943, during the heat of World War II, Romaine attended nursing school at the University of Colorado at Boulder. She was a proud member of the Alpha Chi Omega sorority house. That same year, she met the love of her life, a handsome shy Navy cadet, at a school dance. They were introduced by a mutual friend and quickly fell in love. Romaine and Antone Kimball Romney (Kim) were married on June 30, 1945, in Denver, Colorado. They were married in the uncertain yet hopeful period between Victory of Europe Day (May 8) marking Germany's surrender in Europe and Victory in Japan Day (September 2) marking Japan’s surrender and the end to World War II. It was an historic time and a formative beginning to Romaine and Kim’s relationship and their understanding of sacrifice and service.
Kim and Romaine shared a life full of love, comradery, and respect. They were the young military couple, the busy parents of five children, the struggling academics, the socialites, the conversationalists, and finally, the sweet old couple down the block. Kim and Romaine recently celebrated their 77th Wedding Anniversary. Their time together and raising their five beautiful children were Romaine’s proudest accomplishments. She instilled in her children a sense of kindness, a love of animals, the joy of giving, the comfort of a mint chocolate brownie, and the confidence that comes with unconditional love. Romaine’s favorite times were spent with family around the dinner table with a meal she prepared or sitting in the living room talking. She often said all she wanted was for everyone to be together and for her children to be happy. By quiet resolve and stubborn example, Romaine can rest in peace that her role as mother, confidant, and friend to her children was accomplished tenfold.
Much of Kim and Romaine’s early years of marriage were spent traveling across the country while Kim pursued his education and research studies in anthropology. Supporting the life of an ambitious academic, Romaine packed up the kids every few years and created a new home for the family relocating from Brigham Young University to Purdue, University of Wisconsin to University of Chicago, and Stanford and Harvard. Over the course of Kim’s studies, Romaine raised a growing family while actively participating in his research and fieldwork. In the early 1950’s, Romaine and Kim traveled to a small barrio in the town of Juxtlahuaca, Mexico, to study the Mixtecan Indians. She had two young children and was pregnant with a third. They lived in an adobe house with no running water or electricity. They conducted fieldwork in Juxtlahuaca for nine months and together co-authored the book The Mixtecans of Juxtlahuaca, Mexico. Romaine also gave birth to their third child, Xochitl Patricia, while in Juxtlahuaca. Upon returning from Mexico, Romaine was appointed as a research assistant at Harvard. The fieldwork in Mexico epitomized their lives together as one of curiosity and adventure. For decades, Kim and Romaine continued their research of indigenous cultures including fieldwork with the Navajo in New Mexico, the Maya in the highlands of Guatemala, and the Kuna Indians of the San Blas Islands off the coast of Panama. This intrigue of other cultures fostered a love of travel in Romaine that continued throughout her life.
Romaine loved her muffins, purple pansies, and going on cruises. After Kim’s retirement from teaching for more than 30 years at the University of California, Irvine, they set off to travel the world. Kim and Romaine traveled to all seven continents and have been on almost 50 cruises. Some of Romaine’s favorite trips include a river trip down the Amazon, the full solar eclipse in China, a lava rock steam bath in Japan, walking among whale bones in Antarctica, sitting with seals in Galapagos, a camel ride in Cairo, retracing Paul Gaugin’s Tahiti, visiting the Library in Ephesus, and a river cruise to Odessa. Romaine often said travel provides perspective. Each trip adds to one’s fabric and creates bridges to new places. Romaine was a true traveler rather than a mere tourist in life.
Perhaps most defining of all, Romaine was a faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. She dedicated her life to the Church and served in many prominent roles such as serving in the ward and Stake Relief Society Presidencies. She could organize a party for the entire ward or sit quietly one-on-one as a visiting teacher. She loved teaching and sharing her testimony with others. She continued teaching Relief Society classes into her nineties. Romaine was a devoted follower, but also an independent thinker willing to share her perspective. She was a diligent servant to her faith and relied heavily on the gospel and all her brothers and sisters throughout her life and particularly in her final years. She was always grateful for the sense of community and comfort the Church provided. Most of all, she was so very grateful for all the amazing and compassionate people it brought into her life.
The greatest moments in life are those you share with others. Kim and Romaine embraced this concept with deep conviction through their own connection to each other and their connection with family and friends. Romaine loved to entertain guests at their home. She enjoyed attending book club and her 40-year running bridge group with the ladies. In her last game with the ladies earlier this year, Romaine was still the best scorekeeper. Romaine was a true friend and provided an unspoken solidness that brought people together.
Romaine was preceded in death by her parents, her brothers, and by her daughter Rebecca Anne McCauley (Chad). She is survived by her husband Kim, son Robert Kimball Romney (Lenore), daughters Xochitl Patricia Conner (Frank), Katherine Romney Thorn (David), and Lisa Gretta Romney (Mary). She also leaves behind six grandchildren: Gretta Stone (Remington), Emily Spears (John), Kate Hindes (Jeff), Cameron Rawls (Hannah), Anna Thorn (Ian), and Jessica Johansen. Romaine had 10 great-grandchildren: Brett Rawls, Kylie Johansen, Nova Medina, Everett Stone, Alta Medina, Margaret Hindes, Vera Stone, Meara Hindes, Stellar Johnson, and Remy Johnson.
A memorial service will be held at 11:00 a.m. on Friday, January 6, 2023, at The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints located at 2150 Bonita Canyon Drive, Newport Beach, California 92660. A grave side service will be held for family members at 11:30 a.m. on Thursday, January 5, 2023, at the Pacific View Mortuary located at 3500 Pacific View Drive, Corona del Mar, California 92625. You may send flowers to the family home or to the Pacific View Mortuary or you can donate to one of Romaine’s favorite charities. Romaine was a champion of many causes and a constant supporter of those in need. She regularly donated to dozens of charities. Some of her recent favorites include the Orange County Rescue Mission, National Wildlife Federation, Finally Home, Doctors without Borders, Yosemite Conservancy, Disabled Veterans Charities, Mercy Ships, and the American Indian Services.
Romaine was the best wife, mother, and friend to all of us. She was a beautiful light in the world and will be deeply missed.
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