Herbert L. Sobel

On August 2, 1927, Herbert Lowell was the second son born to Harry and Lillian Sobel, joining big brother Mort. After growing up in Brooklyn, NY and losing his dear mother at the age of 12, he became a “survivor”, fending for himself most of the time to figure out his path in life.

He was given the “gift” of being very bright and passed a difficult exam to get into a special high school in Manhattan. As soon as he graduated high school, he enlisted in the Navy that same month, August, 1944. As a result of serving his country in WWII the last year of the war, he was eligible for the GI bill, giving him the opportunity to graduate from college and then law school.

He met our mom, Lois Trope, a beautiful young woman from Charleston, W. VA while at Syracuse Law School and they were married in 1950. They began their married life in Queens, NY. Jan Laurie was born in 1955 and Vicki Lynn in 1958. At six months old, Vicki got pneumonia , Herb was tired of shoveling snow so Herb and Lois “took the risk”, left their jobs and moved to Florida. It’s difficult to imagine that the first house they rented in the Killian area (often referred to as “the sticks”) had no A/C! That’s probably when Herb began to question shoveling snow versus intense heat and humidity but Florida became our home-and remained my dad’s primary residence for the next 54 years.

Herb worked “smart” instead of hard and he was so playful when he came home. His older daughter, Jan, had a grocery store made out of cardboard with little cardboard boxes hidden behind the counter. Herb would always prompt Jan that he needed something special and he was sure that she didn’t have it in her store. Jan would say, “Ask me, ask me!” This “game of love” went back and forth for what seemed like an eternity when, in truth it was probably only three or four minutes. Finally, Herb asked little Jan for the product and…lo and behold….she had it.! It was Niagara cleaning detergent. He was very creative and knew how to bring this out in kids….and that leads to Herb and his now infamous title as “Mr. Dooly”.

All the “Doolies” (kids in the neighborhood) would gather outside and impatiently wait for him to come out with his megaphone and mix of activities for our three hours of excitement. We would have kickball competitions, tug of war, memory games and much more. He continued to call us Doolies throughout our lives and even called his grandsons Dooly Aron, Dooly Troy and Dooly Seth. He was proud of the lifelong gift and memory he gave to so many but was always too humble to take much credit for that wonderful experience he gave so many of us in life.

We moved to BelAir, CA in 1965 and got a taste of the early sixties. Herb and Lois decided to take the family on a drive up the coast to San Francisco and Berkeley. Although Jan and Vicki were still quite young, Herb and Lois were in their 30’s and probably wanted to see what this new sixties scene was all about. We got an early vision of Woodstock to come. “Hippies” lined the streets of Berkeley¸ holding up signs for Phily, Boston, NY, etc and then…..there was a guy with a cardboard sign which said, “Anywhere”! Where is anywhere, Jan wondered? I think Lois and Herb realized we’d better get these kids back to Florida….and so the four Sobels headed back to Florida!

One particular event stands out in Vicki’s mind from the early years on Riviera Drive. She was in the 7th grade and getting a ride home from a party nearby. When her friend’s father approached her house, he said “Wow, are you Herb Sobel’s daughter?” Vicki proudly said “YES”, and he said, “Your father is the smartest man I know and so successful, that I would love to have the ideas that he thought of and threw out in the garbage, and I bet I would be a millionaire.” This was in the 1970’s.....that ultimate compliment from a virtual stranger stuck with Vicki for these last 40 years as it was the first time she heard something like that about her dad-but certainly not the last...

When Vicki was in college, she wanted to change her major from Accounting to General Business as she struggled with a few difficult upper level accounting classes. She was going to possibly get a “C” in a class or two and she was always an A/B student. Her dad said, “Vicki , it’s better to get a “C” or two and get your degree in Accounting and become a CPA, certified public accountant, and then you’ll be set for life and always have job security anywhere in the world”. Although he rarely gave others advice, he was adamant that Vicki needed to do this, so she followed his advice. Again, he was absolutely right, as Vicki has a very successful career in Accounting, and so she thanked him over and over for that excellent advice that provided her with a great career.

Herb and Lois built a beautiful home on the Coral Gables waterway. Lots of entertaining, boating, ping-pong competitions, a great home, a great life, sleepaway camp in the North Carolina mountains for many years, one of the best experiences according to Jan and Vicki. Our parents taught us to be humble, get a job at 16 years old while in high school. Herb’s favorite mantra to his daughters, and what a great life lesson he instilled in them to this day was, “The more you do for yourself, the more I will do for you”. In essence, prove yourself to be worthy, responsible, respectful, humble human beings. Herbert Lowell Sobel grew up with much adversity, learned to overcome and was amazing father and human being. By 1980, Herb and Lois had parted ways after 29 years but remained friends over the years.

In 1987, after being together for many years, Herb married Bobbie whom he had met indirectly through his sister-in-law, Doris Sobel. Herb and Bobbie traveled the world, dined in fine restaurants, loved Paris where Herb could speak the language along with Spanish, some Italian and some German¬¬-another “talent” he was very humble about. They finally decided to rent a place in Queens NY so they could be closer to Bobbie’s two daughters, Carla and Lisi and their families. We never saw the place they rented but remember Bobbie telling us it was very close to where MY parents lived when Jan was born…… a full circle experience.

It was in NYC at a restaurant that Herb had his first stroke in 1996. He was 79 years old and hadn’t been a patient in a hospital since he was born. In his strongly decisive manner, he decided he did not want to be taken to the hospital. Shortly thereafter, a full-fledged stroke occurred where Herb remained in South Miami Hospital for four months, then rehab and more rehab. Bobbie was his biggest advocate while he was in the hospital and in treatment and, for that, his daughters, Vicki and Jan, will always be grateful.

There were accomplishments and there were setbacks, a couple of more cruises, lots more fine dining in Herb and Bobbie’s favorite Gables restaurants….until Bobbie had a recurrence of breast cancer in late 2008, early 2009. In January 2010, Bobbie passed away and Herb was despondent….heartbroken.

Jan and Vicki, both living about three hours away, needed and wanted to take responsibility for their dad’s well-being . Jan created a new team, Team Sobel, to rally around Herb- Jan, Vicki, Gloria, Deysi, his loving caregiver, many support staff at The Palace during his entire year and a half at The Palace. Over time, the “team” grew and so many people were supportive of Herb¬, visiting him and just spending time with him which really gave him such pleasure. Aside from Vicki and Jan, there was Jeff, Terry, Bob, Elliott and so many others. Of course, his nightly calls from his former tennis partner, Al, every night at 9:15 p.m. were very special to him.

After all the amazing things Herb had taught to his daughters about life-integrity, independence, love and, of course, “The more you do for yourself, the more I’ll do for you”, Jan and Vicki didn’t hesitate to step up to the plate and get the best care possible for their dad. They always told him, especially in these last few years that they got to spend so much time together, how AMAZING he has always been as a father, through thick and thin! He would have the most beautiful smile on his face when he heard those sincere words.

Herb was a “fighter” from the time he lost his beloved mother 12 weeks before his Bar Mitzvah to the time he fought diligently as a stroke victim who had so many limitations as time went on. How life teaches us lessons, a man who was so self-made and fiercely independent to one who became so dependent on others to do almost everything for him.

Herbert Lowell Sobel grew up with much adversity, learned to overcome and was amazing father and human being. He rose from that adversity to become a GREAT man, living a great life, making a difference in so many people’s lives, being an individual, a creative thinker who lived and died on his own terms, when he was ready¸ on February 29, 2012.

Rest in PEACE, Dad, Mr.Dooly. You deserve it. We will love you forever.

Your daughters,

Jan and Vicki

Arrangements under the direction of Lakeside Memorial Park and Funeral Home, 10301 NW 25th Street Miami, FL.33172