Elizabeth “Liz” Hemenway (née Elizabeth Gillmor Stidger) passed away peacefully of heart disease at age 94 on Sunday April 2, 2023 in Marietta GA with loving family comforting her. She lived with brio to the last hour.
Liz was deeply curious and wholly engaged in life, giving of herself with unmatched generosity, tact, and grace. She was treasured for her knowledge, intelligence, counsel, and laughter. With her husband Brewster Roe Hemenway of Buffalo NY, a diplomat with the US Foreign Service, she travelled and everywhere embraced the people and cultures she encountered, making lifelong friends while maintaining close family ties back home, no matter the distance.
She generously supported the music, theater, and visual arts everywhere she lived, advocated for many causes and instilled a deep appreciation of creativity and service in her children and grandchildren. Most of all, she inspired friends and family to be their best selves and never failed to lift them when they faltered. Liz lived the Christian ethic throughout her life and later reflected “classical music became my religion.”
Liz loved small gatherings with great food, wine, and conversation, especially about her beloved Buffalo Bills (she rarely missed a game) and the latest family, geopolitical, and cultural insights. She wielded her terrific sense of humor skillfully to bring friends and family together, break inevitable tensions, and express her boundless joy in life. Never lonely when she was alone, she also valued the quiet hours of her days.
Liz was born March 11, 1929 in Orange NJ to Ivan Read Stidger, M.D., of Moundsville WV and Ethel Bogart Graham, a nurse, of Lee MA. “Lizzie” was the youngest of three siblings, with Anne S. Pickering, also a nurse, and Bill G. Stidger, a businessman. Liz loved singing and dancing, was a gifted pianist, and delighted in the NY Metropolitan Opera. As an adult she sang with The Pitch Pipers, a female barbershop a cappella group, and with the National Cathedral Choir in Washington DC.
Liz graduated from Allegheny College in Meadville PA in 1951 with a BA in French and a minor in Secretarial Studies. She became a program planner with the US Department of State Fulbright Program in Georgetown, DC, where she met Brewster (“Brew”), then married him in 1956 to begin their journey with the Foreign Service starting with their first posting in Barcelona. The couple soon had their first child, Caroline (“Cari”) and Liz immersed herself fully in her career as Foreign Service Officer (FSO) spouse, with a lifelong delight in gathering people around common interests and in fostering mutual understanding through cultural exchange. Together with Brew, she hosted many dignitaries including three American presidents-to-be and even musician Louis Armstrong.
The next 20 years included posts in Quito, Ecuador (where her son Roe and daughter Janet were born); Montevideo, Uruguay; Bogotá, Colombia; and Vienna, Austria; she always represented the best of her country and culture with grace and skill. At every post, Liz dedicated herself to helping the local community, taking keen note of local needs and becoming involved in establishing systemic solutions, always in partnership with local women. She worked to improve schools and hospitals, educate and support disadvantaged women, and promote the arts as a scaffolding for mental and spiritual well-being. Liz also took on leadership roles with US and international women’s organizations that were instrumental in successful diplomatic relations. And in the early 1970s, Liz joined the internal worldwide campaign of Foreign Service wives to change Foreign Service policy on spouse evaluation and unpaid work – “I was happy to be on the front end of the endeavor with my angry letter!” The result was a new directive that abolished the policy and opened up opportunities for thousands of US women.
These experiences were punctuated by stateside posts in New York, Rhode Island, and around Washington DC. Home-leaves allowed Liz to reconnect with family in Buffalo, Gettysburg and Ontario, catch up with US culture, and, most important, visit her own kin at their rustic family cabin on a modest pond in the Berkshires. She spent weeks there every summer, truly at home, alone or with her family. She skinny dipped, walked the woods, read, told stories, enjoyed Tanglewood and art centers nearby, played Up-Jenkins, and taught everyone how to use the oil lamps, water pump, and wood stove. It was her sanctuary and touchstone.
Retiring from the Foreign Service to Buffalo with Brewster in 1985, they continued to venture abroad with many of their lifelong friends and family, ever fostering new experiences. The couple fully embraced Buffalo’s rich cultural and social scene. Liz joined the Garrett Club for its lively lectures and contributed to its success as board member and bridge champion. She volunteered with Meals on Wheels and Canopy of Neighbors, became a docent at Wright’s Darwin Martin House, fundraised, and supported the Burchfield Penney Art Center, the Albright-Knox Art Gallery, the Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra, and more. She participated in both Trinity Episcopal Church and Westminster Presbyterian. Liz even created her own rabid Bills Mafia group and remained a member in good standing until her last breath.
When Brew passed away in 2002, Liz continued to travel extensively, win at bridge and golf, ride ziplines and mopeds, spoil grandchildren, and retreat yearly to her Berkshire sanctuary. She never stopped finding ways to express her deep love for sister Anne and Anne’s husband Jim and for her dearest in-laws and “out-laws” (including Dodie, Georgia, Jackie, and Prudy). She even created a Covid-19 pod with her Buffalo Mafia friends, meeting every Tuesday at her place for cocktails and hors-d'oeuvres and securing a home for companionship and joy even in difficult times.
In 2021, as living alone became more chore than pleasure, she moved into an independent living community in Marietta GA, just a few miles from her daughters. There, her charm, insight, warm personality and worldly experience won her still more new friends. Above all, Liz relished the frequent visits of all six children/spouses, and eight grandchildren and their spouses.
Elizabeth Hemenway was alight with life and had a calendar filled with future events, anticipating the births of her first two great-granddaughters, due in April and August. Liz was known as a trusted and gentle soul who welcomed and drew out the best in people. Effortlessly sensitive to others, she was quick to mend rifts, offering and receiving sage counsel on a foundation of deep personal integrity.
Liz was preceded in death by her parents, husband Brewster Roe Hemenway (1928-2002), sister Anne Stidger Pickering (1923-2005) and brother William “Bill” Graham Stidger (1925-1967). Survivors include her three children: Caroline Graham Hemenway of Marietta, GA and spouse Earl Martin Chamberlin, Jr., Brewster Roe Hemenway, Jr. and spouse Sharon Rudolph Hemenway of Painted Post NY, and Janet Hemenway Taylor and spouse Mike Taylor of Marietta GA; and eight grandchildren ( Austin, Matthew, Samantha, Daniel, Stephen, Christopher, Andrew, and Benjamin) and their partners (Natalie, Hannah, Emily, Maebdh). Liz passed away just days before her first great granddaughter (Carter Emilia Taylor) was born; as Liz’s granddaughter-in-law Hannah affirmed, Carter gained a guardian angel to watch over her.
Liz will be interred at Fairmount Cemetery in Lee MA beside her ancestors and husband, and with ashes scattered among the white pines and sassafras and upon the quiet waters of her cherished Berkshire pond.
Please join us as we celebrate Liz’s life on May 13 at 1:00pm at Parc at Piedmont East Cobb, 999 Hood Road, Marietta, GA.
Please post any loving remembrances you have of Liz in the section below, and any photos too. Or email them to her family at [email protected]. In lieu of flowers, Liz would have appreciated donations to causes she supported. Here are a couple of suggestions:
Marietta Cobb Museum of Art: https://mariettacobbartmuseum.org
Canopy of Neighbors: https://canopy.clubexpress.com
Buffalo Philharmonic Orchestra (https://bpo.org)
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