Shirley Ruth Shapiro

Shirley was born in Brooklyn on February 1, 1931. Her parents, Esther (nee Ohsie) and

Irving Klein were Jewish immigrants from Vilna and Hungary. With younger sister Leona, the family lived in Brooklyn and Shirley graduated from James Madison High School. Expected from a young age to lend a hand in large family gatherings, Shirley and Leona learned from their mother the importance of hosting holidays and other special occasions, always with a table overflowing with food and often with all the extra chairs they could find. While Esther modeled a nurturing home, Irving shared with Shirley his spirit of adventure, a flare for fashion and a love of gardening.

For many summers, she and Leona attended Camp Tagola in the Catskills while her parents vacationed in a nearby cottage. At camp she was a color war team captain and made lifelong friends. It was there, during a polio quarantine, that she fell in love with fellow counselor and Brooklynite, Harris Shapiro. This relationship blossomed and she married Harris at age 19, leaving NYU to help Harris finish his degree in engineering. The young couple lived briefly in the family attic and at London Terrace Gardens before settling in Teaneck, NJ, where she gave birth to three daughters Elaine, Beth, and Diane.

In 1968, the family moved to Tenafly in a home that was designed to be physically accessible to accommodate Beth’s limited mobility and to be a welcoming place to entertain. She was an accomplished homemaker and a terrific cook. Her home was always a comfortable place to visit and the site for many happy gatherings. Shirley lived there for the rest of her life.

In addition to her family duties, Shirley was a general partner of London Terrace Gardens and she made a career of community service. She and Harris began lifelong commitments to volunteering, beginning with the Cerebral Palsy Center of Bergen County where Beth attended. Shirley worked diligently to support this small organization and later serving until shortly before her death on the Board of the organization’s successor- the CTC Academy. She joined the League of Women Voters, actively participating in public interest research, registering voters and moderating candidate forums. She made many friends among this group of smart hardworking women and shared their passion for grass roots democracy. She was especially active in the Jewish community, serving on the Sisterhood of Temple Emanu-El in Closter, NJ, and then on its Board of Directors until she was in her 90s. She also took an active interest in the Solomon Schecter School of Bergen County and the Jewish Theological Seminary.

For many years Shirley was a regular tennis player and she avidly followed the Yankees and tennis on tv. She loved music and the ballet, attending shows often at the Metropolitan with her sister until Covid made that impossible. She enjoyed traveling extensively with Harris, and then after Harris died, she continued traveling to favorite destinations and reaching new ones with friends and family. She loved to paper clip magazine recipes even after she stopped cooking much and did cross word puzzles daily.

Her preferred mode for communication was the telephone and she stayed in touch with many people by initiating regular calls. She also loved to write notes and collected beautiful cards so that she was always prepared to send a formal thank you, birthday greeting or get-well message. She never missed an occasion until she could no longer read the calendar itself, and she wanted to see and talk to us as often as possible. In drawers throughout her home, Shirley archived many of the letters and greetings loved ones sent her. Every room in her home was filled with family photos, so that we were always in her sights. If she did not hear from you, she called. In this, she was much like her mother. It pained her to think anyone of us might be in trouble, and she especially worried when we were on the road, always waiting for the phone to ring to say we had arrived at our destination.

Shirley avoided criticism and gave her unwavering support to her family and equally to her close friends, even throughout a rapidly progressing dementia. She showed up and paid attention to all the people in her life with kindness and good humor. While she stood short at well under five feet, she made an outsized impression on seemingly everyone she crossed paths with.

Shirley died at home surrounded by loved ones on May 13, 2024, at age 93. She is predeceased by her husband Harris and her daughter Beth Steele (James). In addition to her sister, Leona Kern, and daughters Elaine Appellof (Jerry Saunders) and Diane Shamas (Tim Morton) she leaves behind seven grandchildren: Rachel Appellof, Eleanor Stewart, Emily Steele, Sara Appellof, Jacob Appellof, Raphael Shamas, and Irene Shamas and two great grandchildren: Harris and Sally Stewart. In typical fashion, Shirley treated all her grandchildrens’ partners as children: Philip, Nate, Jeremy, Emily, and Eli, and had a special close relationship with step-grandchildren, Julia and Ben Saunders and step-great grandchildren, Nina and Noah. In addition, she adored her large circle of nieces, nephews, other extended family, and friends.

A funeral service is scheduled for 11AM on Thursday, May 16, 2024 at Temple Emanu El of Closter, 180 Piermont Road, Closter, NJ

Please direct Memorial Donations to CTC Academy, 29-01 Berkshire Road, Fair Lawn, NJ 07410 or to a charity of you choosing