My husband and I met one day in a very unique way, I was waiting for a bus at the bus depot in Los Angeles, There I noticed a young man also waiting for the same bus. While waiting for the bus to come we had a nice conversation, we also continued our conversation inside the bus until we each arrived at our destination.
We did not exchange names or phone numbers and lost communication. I kept thinking about him after that day and wondered what his name was. After 2 weeks, I was at the bus depot again, traveling back to the city. There I saw the same young man waiting again for the same bus. This time my mother was with me and he immediately approached me . I found out he was also thinking about me. I introduced him to my mom at that time we exchanged names and after talking for some time, he asked my mom’s permission to have my phone number so he can call me.
He called me after a short time and asked to take me out. We first became friends, and after we began to date, then with time, he asked me to marry him. At that time I was of catholic faith and he was of Christian faith. My mom accepted but with the condition to get married by the catholic church, he happily agreed.
Years after we were married, we had our first daughter, Yolie and then 2 years later our second daughter, Brenda was born, both were our joy.
My husband was a person who was much loved by everyone. Not a single person disliked him. He always had a smile and was very polite to whomever he met. This is how we raised our daughters,
from his example. He was a strong man of faith and very dedicated to God. We had a life full of joy and happiness also full of love and laughter.
My husband loved to joke, (he used to put scarecrows in the shower so I could get scared), he loved to laugh, and to hug his friends in such a caring manner. He loved history very much and loved reading the bible and always talking about it. He loved to make special projects and make inventions around the house to make things work better. He also loved to cook and every weekend would do pancakes and waffles for us. He loved baking pineapple upside-down cakes, and would always make cakes for me to take to my work so my coworkers can enjoy.
He loved planting trees. He had a green thumb, especially his avocado tree. He would give all of his fruit and avocados to his neighbors and friends all around town.
We lived our life very happy together, we would go everywhere together to run errands and my husband knew everyone. Everyone would talk to him and know him by name. They all remember him and how kind and caring he was.
He loved his family so much – he took care of his daughters in every way he could. He would say that he would take care of them even until they were 100 years old. My husband was also very much loved by my family. He loved my mother so much. He would take care of her while I worked, and would wake up early each day to make her breakfast and give her, her medication. It was a very special relationship between my husband and mother.
What I loved about my husband is that he was so loving to me. He treated me with genuine care and would always spoil me. He made all my favorite breakfast dishes. If I fell asleep on the sofa watching my TV shows, he would come and nearly carry me to bed and put my pajamas and socks on for me. Every night we would pray together to complete our day. I always will remember him for doing everything possible to help me. He would tell me “I want to help you as much as I can because I want to be with you forever and I don’t want you to do too much. I have to take care of you a lot so we can grow old together because I can’t live without you”
I will miss him very much and all that he did for me and my family. He will be forever remembered by his friends and both of our families. He is with us in spirit and we’ll see him again in heaven with God.
From Daughter, Yolanda Fernandez-Marquez:
It is difficult to say all that I want to say about my dad. I have so many beautiful memories about my dad. When I think about my dad, I feel so blessed to have one of the greatest dad a girl could have asked for. To me he was no ordinary man. To me, my dad was my teacher, mentor, and most of all my superhero.
My father was the kind of man that brought great comfort simply with his presence. My favorite place was to be nestled underneath his armpit. He would bring me close, hug me, and kiss the top of my head, and say, “I love you, mijita”. Instantly anything that I may have been going through was quickly dissolved and suddenly I could face anything.
I have so many precious memories of my dad. Like how he taught me how to ride a bike, how he would read me a bible story every night, help me with my school projects, how as a young adult he would insist on driving me to and from school when I had a night class so that I wouldn’t have to walk to my car
at night. How he would check my gas tank every day and insist on putting gas in my car when I was close to being empty to ensure I wouldn’t get stranded somewhere. How he surprised me with a puppy the first time a boy broke my heart. How he prided himself on buying us a birthday cake with a personal picture imprinted on it, How just over a year ago stood by my bedside praying over me while I was in the hospital. I have so many memories detailing how special my dad was, that I could go on for days.
Something significant about my dad was he had a tremendous peace about his life. I never saw my father upset, grumpy, anxious, or worried. In fact growing up my father discouraged all of us from using the word “mad” to describe our feelings. Instead he challenged us to examine our blessings, and in the
end instead of feeling mad we were laughing and making jokes. Throughout our lives, whenever we faced hardships, my father without fail would say, well let’s pray about it. It didn’t matter where we were. Whether it be in the waiting room of a doctor’s office, at the airport, in the supermarket, on the curve of our street. He would quickly without hesitation, reach out his hands to hold ours, and begin to pray. The peace that he had about his life was remarkable.
A few weeks before his passing, while we gathered at his bedside, my father prayed out loud thanking God for the many blessings he had bestowed upon him and his family. He had endured so much pain, and suffering the last few months of his life, but he was praising and thanking God regardless.
His love for people and his family was also noteworthy. He had a genuine love of all people, and expressed it to them regardless of who they were. One of my last memories of my dad was when he was in the rehabilitation center. As we would make our way out of his room out into the halls there was
not one person that he would let go by without giving them a smile, a wave, shaking their hand, or patting them on the back. He had every right to be grumpy, upset, frustrated. But instead he chose to be happy, to love, and to remain full of peace.
I am extremely blessed that my dad got to meet his grandson, Isaac. Isaac was completely in love with my dad, and my dad was completely in love with him. One of Isaac’s first words was, Pa; short for grandpa. My dad would make Isaac steam veggies. It is because of my dad that Isaac loves vegetables.
My dad would venture out to the stores, and bring Isaac back a set of pajamas, shoes or some goodies for Isaac. Every day, my dad and my son would take their naps together, and if my son would cry all my dad would have to do is lay his hand on Isaac’s belly and he instantly was calmed. After several days in
the hospital I thought Isaac may not recognize my dad after being apart from him for so long. But their bond was strong. As soon as Isaac saw my dad, he wanted to run to him and sit on his lap. Some days towards the end of my father’s life, he was not talking much, but once he saw Isaac his face would light
up, and he would reach out his hand towards him and Isaac would reach out his hands towards my dad.
My father was a man with extreme love in his heart for his family and for anyone that knew him. He had complete trust in Jesus, and therefore he lived a peaceful life. The way my father lived his life inspires me to pass down the same unconditional love my father had for his family down to my family. My
father passed down a legacy which provided deep spiritual, social and emotional roots that will continue to grow with his children and his grandchildren and for generations.
Daddy I cannot thank you enough for all that you have taught me, for the immeasurable love you expressed to me despite my faults and most of all for being my superhero. I will miss you greatly, words cannot express what you have meant to me in my life. Because of you I had a wonderful life, am a better person, and will pass on such a positive heritage to my family. I love you so much.
From Daughter, Brenda Contero
There can never be enough time to say everything I’d like others to know about my dad. I wish that everyone can know everything special about him. I truly believe that my sister and I were very blessed with an amazing dad who exceeded his role as a father. He did anything possible to ensure our happiness.
When we were little and first beginning school in the early 80’s , my dad worked the night shift, so he signed up to be a part of the PTA at our school.. He was the only father amongst all mother’s in the PTA. This didn’t bother him because he knew that he could spend more time with us at school. Part of being in the PTA would involve the chance to serve and sit with the students during our lunch time and it brought us joy to have our dad with us at school. He braided our hair everyday for school and would make us our favorite snacks after school until my mom came home from work. When he would pick us up from school, he’d have surprises for us in the car waiting for us, I particularly remember our first set of baseball gloves and a bat and ball set. Up until he got sick in June, I would still come home from work and find a bag on the door knob with a surprise from my dad.
When I moved into an apartment by myself one year, I was sad because I didn’t have a chance to buy a Christmas tree for my place. One night, I was home and received a phone call, it was my dad at the apartment gate with a long box with a Christmas tree inside. I cried at how thoughtful my dad was. Several years ago, there was heavy rain while I was at work and a co-worker said there was a person outside in the rain by your car. I ran to the window to look and it was my dad standing in the pouring, rain getting soaked changing my windshield wipers for me. I quickly ran out and had him come inside to dry off.
He was a very sensitive man, he would love to hug people. He would even break the toughest of people into a smile because he would give them a bear hug instead of a handshake. Just knowing how much my dad loved us, gave us all such joyful lives. We cannot recall a single moment in our lives where we felt unloved or that he was too busy for us. I could always come to him for everything. I can honestly say he was my best friend and I enjoyed spending time with him. He would tell us that he would brag to his coworkers and his friend how his daughters are not ashamed to be with him and take him out to places. I’m thankful that we never went through that stage in our lives where we were too embarrassed to be with our parents, we took them everywhere.
When I met my husband, he instantly became close to my dad. Tony cherished the small things like talking about boxing, hearing his stories, and joking around with him. Their bond was evident until the very end where my dad’s face would light up every time tony would enter the hospital room. I’m blessed to have married someone who resembles my dad so much in how he cares and loves me. And I’m also thankful that Tony also enjoyed taking my parent’s out and spending time with them.
In 2012, my dad and I began to go to the gym every Monday. We would do our work out and would sometimes even sneak over next door for an ice cream cone and eat it quick in the car so my mom wouldn’t know. I took him to the gym every Monday until just this year, prior to him getting sick. I didn’t realize we held our tradition for 3 years. Every time I dropped him off, he would thank me so much for letting him come with me.
My dad was very special, he was always happy and a positive person. We never saw him sad or upset. I truly believe that my mom, sister and I have been kept safe while traveling driving short or long distances because of my dad’s prayers. He prayed for us every day. We couldn’t walk out of the house without my dad stopping us to pray for us. I know that is what protected us all these years.
To hear him laugh and laugh with him. was a privilege and beautiful experience that all of us have shared.
I will miss you daddy, until we see each other again.
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