Mary Lou Duessel

Mary Lou Duessel, of Dallas, TX passed away on the 28th of February with family by her side. She was 91 years old.

Mary Lou Marshall was born on January 26, 1932, to Herman and Ruth (nee Grindrod) Marshall in Wellsville, NY. She attended Wellsville High School and went on to graduate from Cornell University with a Bachelor’s degree in Home Economics and Columbia University with a Master’s degree in Nursing.

While attending Columbia University, Mary Lou lived in Brooklyn with her sister, Dot and brother-in-law Albert Henderson. Dot and Al lived next door to the Duessel family. One day, the Duessels’ son, Harold, happened to glance outside and see a young lady sunbathing in the backyard next door: Mary Lou. And so the courtship began, with Mary Lou’s mother, Ruth, stating that Harold was much better than the other young men Mary Lou had previously brought home.

Mary Lou and Harold wed on October 29, 1955 and went on to have three sons, Peter, John, and Andrew. Dachshunds were always members of the family and they were so well loved that people would joke that, if there is a next life, they would like to come back as a Duessel dog. Schnappsie, Hansie, Fritzie, Willie, Wolfie and Otto all had great lives. Due to Harold’s career in The U.S. Navy, Mary Lou and Harold had homes in New York, Virginia, Maryland, Newfoundland, Maryland again, Longmeadow, Massachusetts, and finally Litchfield Park, AZ.

It’s hard to capture who Mary Lou was without understanding the compassionate, selfless generosity at the heart of everything she did. A devout Christian and Lutheran, Mary Lou viewed her life through the lens of service to Jesus Christ and his teachings imbued her actions. As a wife, mother, grandmother, friend, neighbor, and volunteer, she was committed to family’s and friends’ well-being. Anyone who met Mary Lou went away feeling like family.

Mary Lou felt that nursing was in her DNA from the very beginning and worked in pediatric nursing for most of her career. She was a school nurse in the Longmeadow Public School system while her children were young. After retiring in Arizona, Mary Lou began to volunteer with the First Steps program at Luke Air Force Base. First Steps was an early intervention program designed to support new mothers and their infants during those early weeks and help service members’ families get off to a great start. Over the course of 23 years, Mary Lou served hundreds of new mothers and their babies, providing a sympathetic ear, a shoulder to cry on, or helpful advice. One day in the infant changing room, Mary Lou realized how chilly the room was. She began sewing baby-wraps to help keep the babies warm. Many of these wraps became a child’s special blankie. She sewed hundreds of these, even during the first year of COVID, when residents at her apartment were confined to their rooms. Mary Lou did not like to be idle.

What Mary Lou did enjoy was good, clean fun. She loved singing, either in the church choir, Christmas caroling in the neighborhood, or humming while making dinner. Every December she worked on an annual Christmas poem greatly anticipated by a host of friends and family. She loved beadwork and made lots of special pieces. She was an accomplished seamstress. During one deployment, Harold brought home a length of silk from Italy from which Mary Lou made an elegant skirt. Along with baby wraps, Mary Lou sewed flannel Christmas stockings for December newborns at the Luke AFB hospital, a Christening outfit for a grandson, kitchen curtains, a tablecloth for a neighbor and more. She even took a millinery class and made her own hats!

What comes to mind most when thinking of Mary Lou was that she was an excellent hostess and cook. She and Harold planned many events: Naval officers’ dinners, neighborhood supper clubs, volunteer lunches, church suppers, New Year’s open houses, dinners for a new mother, and more. There were mornings when a guest could wake up to a home-cooked breakfast, freshly baked coffee cake and quiet morning conversation. Whether providing a cute little lamb cake for a Christening or withholding onions from a recipe, all of this was Mary Lou’s way of saying “I love you”.

Mary Lou is preceded in death by her loving husband of 53 years, Harold; parents, Herman and Ruth (Grindrod) Marshall; sister, Dorothy Marshall Henderson; and brother-in-law Albert Henderson. She is lovingly remembered by sons, Peter, John, and Andrew; daughters-in-law,Lynn, Nancy, and Carolyn; grandchildren, Calvin, Erin, Elliot, Christian, Alec, and Nicole and her husband, Jordon.

Funeral services will be held on Friday, April 14, 2023 at 11:00 am at Menke Funeral Home (12420 No. 103rd Ave, Sun City AZ). Burial will be at the National Memorial Cemetery of Arizona (23029 N. Cave Creek Rd, Phoenix, AZ) at 2:00pm. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to St. Jude Children’s Hospital or Shriners Hospitals for Children.

Fond memories and expressions of sympathy may be shared at www.Sparkman-Hillcrest.com for the Duessel family.