Fay Dabney, 92, died peacefully Monday, December 9, 2019 at Massachusetts General Hospital after a brief illness. A memorial service is scheduled for March 5, 2020 at the Trinity Church, Copley Square, Boston, at 11 o’ clock. A private burial will be held at Mount Auburn Cemetery, Cambridge.
Born in Boston on November 26, 1927, Fay was the daughter of Mary Fay Dabney (d. 1978) and George Bigelow Dabney (d. 1939). She and her family lived with her grandmother, Elizabeth Eliot Fay, at 298 Beacon Street, Boston, until her parents moved the children to Old Tannery Farm in Medfield so they could grow up in “the country.” Fay received her primary education at Charles River School in Dover and her secondary education at Winsor School in Boston as a member of the class of 1946. She spent her childhood summers in Woods Hole, where her mother was born, and in Wareham at her father’s family summer home. She graduated from Smith College in 1950 with a bachelor’s degree in Sociology. Fay later earned a master’s degree in Business from Radcliffe College, erstwhile female counterpart to the then-all-male Harvard University.
Fay was predeceased by her brother, Lewis Stackpole Dabney (d. 2014) of Chestnut Hill, and her sister Caroline Miller Dabney Runner (d. 2011) and brother-in-law, Alfred (d. 2014), of Santa Rosa, CA. She is survived by her sister-in-law Edith LaCroix Dabney of Chestnut Hill; three nieces: Leila Dabney Marconi of Boynton Beach, FL, Mary Fay Runner of Garden Grove, CA, and Bettina Dabney Abe and her husband, George Allan Abe, of Acton, MA; a nephew, Alfred Dabney Runner of Novato, CA; a grand-nephew, Thomas Dabney Abe of New York, NY; and a grand-niece, Magdalen Allaine Abe of Acton, MA. Fay is survived by many cousins on both the Fay and Dabney sides of her family. She placed a high value on family connections, teaching each generation about their roots and the storied history of their ancestors.
Travel was Fay’s lifelong passion and occupation, driving her to take trips all over the world. She lived in New York City for 20 years after graduate school and moved to Boston’s Back Bay in 1978. A great lover of art, music, and culture, Fay had a “delicious” zest for life and its beauty. She traveled to Iran and Jordan when she was in her eighties; at 88 she made one last visit to Paris, her favorite city. A 30-year employee of Raymond and Whitcomb Travel Company, Fay planned detailed itineraries for her clients, who returned for her expertise again and again. Fay became known as the premier travel consultant in Boston who had firsthand knowledge of destinations around the world. Fay traveled to Africa many times; she loved all animals, but lions were her most favorite. She adored wolves and celebrated their 1995 reintroduction to Yellowstone Park by visiting the Elderhostel (now Road Scholar) there in the in winter to track and study the now thriving ecosystem, thanks to the wolf population. Undaunted by traveling solo, Fay was an unquenchable learner.
Fay was a generous supporter of local and global charities and her alma maters. A patron of the arts, she attended the Boston Symphony Orchestra, Tanglewood, Emmanuel Music of Boston, the Cantata Singers of Cambridge, and the Museum of Fine Arts, Boston. She volunteered with the Friends of the Public Garden and Hale Barnard Services. She was an active member of Trinity Church in Copley Square. She also supported the Woods Hole Historical Museum and the Church of the Messiah of Woods Hole. Fay loved to swim in the ocean and play tennis. She was a member of the Boston Badminton and Tennis Club and the Longwood Cricket Club. Fay was a dedicated fan of the Boston Red Sox and attended games at Fenway Park into her nineties, a pastime she enjoyed with her brother, Lewis.
A strong believer in human rights and an environmentalist, Fay was a lifelong Democrat. Fay believed that if you support the work of charity and citizen groups but are otherwise busy with your occupation, then you should help fund the effort. She supported, watched, and avidly listened to both public television and radio. She supported The Shafeek Nader Trust for the Community Interest of Washington, DC. and The American Museum of Tort Law in Winsted CT, participating in its historic opening in September, 2015. Fay had many deep and abiding friendships, not only with her contemporaries, but with people of all ages. All who knew and loved her can attest to her fearlessness, curiosity, joie de vivre, kindness, fierce independence, and indomitable spirit.
In lieu of flowers, donations may be made in Fay Dabney’s name to Trinity Church of Boston; the Church of the Messiah of Woods Hole; Hale House Barnard Services, 273 Clarendon Street, Boston, MA; the Boston Symphony Orchestra; and the American Museum of Tort Law (https://www.tortmuseum.org/).
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