Brian Joseph de los Angeles

Growing up the boys did all sorts of boy things together, played with friends down the street, they roughhoused together, they played Legos together. They were outside a lot. In fact, when Brian was three, out in the garden, his mother wasn’t quite quick enough to prevent Brian from eating a worm. Brian was into sports. He played basketball and football. He graduated from Monroe High School in the year 2000.

After high school he learned to be a machinist and went to work at a friend’s machine shop. Once he got a job, he took the plunge and bought a new Pontiac Grand Am, that he named “Raven” because it was jet black.

He held down various jobs, but mostly…the main thing in his life, is that he just continued to love his brothers and his family. They continued to do a lot of fun things together: they went to Mariner’s games. They took in hockey (he liked the Chicago BlackHawks).

They watched sports on TV, played video games and they participated in a Fantasy Football League. He was so proud - and this is the thing that keeps coming up again - he was so proud of every one of his brothers, and their accomplishments.

Brian encountered numerous challenges in his life, and he used what was available to him to try to live with stability. Despite his struggles, Brian showed himself to be a thoughtful son and brother. He was truly loving to his mother and his father, and his brothers. He was expressive, telling his parents about his life, though he tried not to overshare, because he didn’t want them to worry.

He was an amazingly thoughtful gift-giver.

His gifts, whether for Christmas or for a birthday, were creative and intentional. He knew his mother liked to make jam, so he bought for her a peach tree one time and a loganberry bush, another time, things that lasted. And he planted them in the yard for her.

Brian loved his mother’s cooking. And he tried to cook like Debbie. He loved her chicken-fried steak, her fried chicken, meatloaf or marinated steak. His declared favorite, though, was her spaghetti. He wanted to be a pastry chef and started baking birthday cakes. He became the family’s birthday cake maker, making an awesome chocolate cake for everyone’s birthdays. Recently he even applied to culinary school in Oregon in order to fulfill that dream. …before Covid hit.

Brian was a man who told others what he felt.

He was expressive. One time, upon seeing a picture of his mom and dad, taken when they met around 1974, Brian said, “I’m glad you guys met”.

Another time, he looked at his mom and said, “I think you are still beautiful.” He was close to his grandmother, Twilla, who passed on March 4 of this year, from Covid. Brian was impacted by that. Brian also had a heart for spiritual things. One time several, years ago, he went to his dad and asked his dad for a prayer. So Bob gave Brian The Lord’s Prayer. He used it, absorbed it. Brian was known for showing his sweetness to others.

Brian was also proud of his Native American heritage. His father gave to each of his sons a drum that he hand-painted on the skin. Brian proudly kept his wool tribal blanket, from 8th Generation, on his bed.

Though Brian struggled with his identity, the Native community’s description of Two Spirit resonated deeply with him. He spoke of this Two Spirit resonance to his mother; and increasingly thought of himself as a Two Spirited person; one who had both a male and a female spirit within him, one who was blessed by his Creator to see life through the eyes of both genders. Though he was never completely settled and secure in his identity, he aspired to this Two Spirit balance. Brian longed to embrace the Two Spirit ideal; he wanted to embrace an ability to walk in both worlds holistically.

Brian will be remembered for his many expressions of sweetness into the world.

Brian J. de los Angeles, of North Bend, passed away Sunday, May 31, 2020. He was 38 years old.

Brian is preceded in death by his beloved grandmother, Twilla J. Morin, who passed on March 4, 2020.

Brian leaves behind his heartbroken parents Deborah (Morin) and Robert de los Angeles. He also leaves behind 3 brothers who he was so very proud of: Steven, Aron and Robbie. He is survived by nieces and nephews, cousins and many other relatives and friends.

We will miss this loving man, Brian. But we will treasure the memory of him deeply in our hearts forever.